The Art of Charm

The Art of Charm Bootcamp

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Apr 17, 2023

01:04:53

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

In today’s episode, we cover breakups with AJ, Johnny, and Michael Herold.

Breakups are painful whether you’re breaking up with someone or being broken up with, so what is the best way to handle a breakup, what is the worst thing you can do after a breakup, and what can you do to stand out in a sea of unlimited options when you start dating again?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What damage is hookup culture doing to you and the people around you?
What is the worst thing you can do after a breakup?
What is the best way to handle a breakup?

Rejection can cause anger and lower IQ – 13:35
How does rejection affect your mental state?
What can you do to overcome your fear of rejection and start dating the people you’re attracted to?

Stand Out in the Modern Dating Market – 25:21
What steps do you need to take to stand out from the crowd in a dating market of unlimited options?
How do you spark attraction on the first date?
What are some ways to effectively build a social circle?

Core Values and Dating – 40:13
Why do you need to identify your core values to be successful in dating and what can you do to figure out what your core values are?
How do you build a weekly routine that filters in high quality dating prospects?

Explore the ups and downs of dating in today's world! We dive deep into the pain of rejection and what it does to our brains, as well as the damage caused by breakups. We also discuss the best ways to build a successful social life and the importance of physical self-care. Join us as we share tips on how to stand out in a world with unlimited options and how to improve your online dating profile. We also touch on the power of weak ties and how they could be the key to finding your perfect match.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Prince Ea’s YouTube channel

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Apr 10, 2023

00:59:54

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

In today’s episode, we cover happiness and fulfillment with Prince Ea. Prince Ea grew up as a shy, introverted kid who discovered conscious hip hop in high school and was inspired to make music to educate others like the rappers he admired did for him. He pursued a career in hip hop but found himself constantly comparing and competing with other artists which led him to question the meaning of happiness. He stopped rapping and began reading books on Buddhism, Hinduism, Taoism, and psychotherapy to find the answer. He found that happiness is inside all of us and began sharing his insights through poetry and informative content. He continues to be the change he wants to see in the world and helps others find peace in their own lives.

The journey to find fulfillment in life is filled with obstacles and distractions, so what can you do to overcome them, what resources can you use to find happiness and fulfillment, and how can you know who to bring with you on your journey so they don’t hold you back?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What advantages does being shy grant you over people who are extroverted?
How do you avoid the comparison trap of social media so you don’t get lost in beating yourself up over not doing or having enough?

Failure and Self-Criticism – 12:48
How do you view failure so you don’t bogged down when something you create doesn’t have the reception or impact you thought it would?
What can you do to be more patient?

Maximize the Value You Take From Books – 23:06
How do you approach a book to get the most value out of it?
What can you do to unlock your inner confidence and create lasting changes in your life?

Filtering People In and Out of Your Life – 32:28
How do you know who to allow into your life and who to remove from your life?

We explore stories of self-discovery and inner growth, ranging from the importance of self-love to the power of books and the pivotal role of relationships in our lives. We hear about a rapper's journey to finding peace, the value of prioritizing one's own world, and how comparing oneself to others online can lead to a trap. Additionally, we take a closer look at the significance of friendships, how to find a tribe that aligns with our energy, and the role language plays in our relationships. Tune in for insights and tips to cultivate personal growth and create a more fulfilling life.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Prince Ea on Instagram

Prince Ea on Twitter

Prince Ea’s website

The Mood Cure: The 4-Step Program to Take Charge of Your Emotions--Today

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Apr 03, 2023

01:07:08

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

In today’s episode, we cover the myth of normal with Gabor Mate. Gabor is a renowned physician and author who has dedicated his life to exploring the themes of health, normality, and mental health. With a background in medicine, Gabor challenges existing norms and values, advocating for a world in which our practices reflect the true needs of individuals and society. He has written a number of books, including his best-selling work The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture, in which he questions traditional ideas of what is normal and challenges readers to think critically about our assumptions.

Modern society is rewarding us for unhealthy behavior and punishing us for healthy behavior, but how did this come to be, how is it affecting you and everyone you care about, and what steps can you take to protect yourself and your loved ones?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is the myth of normal?
How has culture become toxic to the human condition?
Why is being nice harmful to your mental health?

Modern culture is destroying parent-child relationships – 15:37
How does modern culture erode a child’s ability to form bonds with their parents and what can you do ensure you have a healthy relationship with your kids?
Why do we feel the need to escape reality and pursue virtual relationships and virtual experiences?

What is trauma? – 25:11
How do we misuse the word “trauma” and how does it lead us to ignore serious problems in our relationships?
What can you do to heal your trauma so it stops harming you and your relationships?

Can we use anger to heal? – 35:40
Why is anger important for self-respect and feeling good about yourself and what is the difference between unhealthy and healthy anger?
What 5 steps can you take to overcome your limiting beliefs so you can unlock your potential and achieve your dreams?

What does it mean to be “normal” in a society where normal behavior seems increasingly harmful to our health and relationships? All the time we spend inside, alone, and on devices is not doing us any favors. But how did this happen? What pushed humans to develop lifestyles that are making us unhappy and unhealthy? It starts with the parents and how we have structured our lives to promote relationships that don’t serve us, discourage healthy expression of our emotions and boundary setting.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness, and Healing in a Toxic Culture by Gabor Mate

Gabor Mate’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Harvard Happiness Study & What it Takes to Be Socially Fit | Dr. Robert Waldinger | AOC Podcast

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Mar 27, 2023

00:54:18

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

In today’s episode, we cover how to forge a thriving life with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael.

We are at war with the modern world when it comes to leading lives of satisfaction and fulfillment because technology and society are pushing us to be depressed and isolated, so how do you overcome it, what can you do to build a thriving social life, and how do you determine a mission that keeps you focused and driven?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is the key to health, wellness, and success in the modern world?

Navigating daily life, office politics, and media can lead to feeling isolated – 10:23
How is the modern world pushing us to isolate and how do you overcome it so you don’t end up sad and lonely?

How to build a new social circle – 21:11
Where do you start if you want to create an exciting social life?
What do we use to add value to peoples’ lives and enrich the relationships in our lives so people value us and want to spend time with us?
How do you reconnect with old friends?

Define your mission to attract high value connections – 31:32
Why is it important to spend time figuring out one's mission and becoming mission-driven, and how do you figure out what your mission is?
How do you create a high value network so you never worry about being lonely, unemployed, or single?

Building relationships is key to success in many areas, including the workplace, and cannot be replaced by hard work alone. And despite external factors such as nepotism and favoritism playing a role in success, building social capital in the form of value you can add to the relationships in your life is key. This episode offers strategies and frameworks for reconnecting with old relationships that have drifted away, including reaching out and inviting people into one's life. Find and connect with people who share similar goals and mindsets. Tune in to this episode for insights on building momentum in life through a high-value network and community.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Jonah Berger | The Art of Persuasion | AOC Podcast

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 20, 2023

00:55:29

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

In today’s episode, we cover magic words and the impact of language with Jonah Berger. Jonah is a Wharton School professor, an expert on natural language processing, influence, and consumer behavior, and is the internationally bestselling author of Magic Words, Contagious, Invisible Influence, and The Catalyst.

Questions are the key to connecting with the people around you, so what kinds of questions should you ask when getting to know someone, what questions should you avoid, and how can you word questions in a way to get people to do what you want them to do?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why are questions so powerful when talking to people?
What kind of question should you ask if you want other people to like you or perceive you better?
What should you say if someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer?

Questions that Push People Out and Pull People In – 14:53
What questions do we ask that put people on the defensive and how do we reword the same questions to get the answers we actually want?
What questions can you ask to turn strangers into friends?
How many questions can you ask before a conversation gets uncomfortable?

Identity and Agency Questions – 26:29
What questions can you ask to motivate people to take the action you want them to take?
How do many of us use self-talk the wrong way and how does it sabotage our goals and dreams?
What is hedging and how does hedging make us seem less confident?

When we use questions as tools, they become powerful. They can build bridges or break them; it's up to us to decide which kind of question we want to use. If you want other people to like you and view you better, the best type of question should be open-ended, positive and interesting. Avoid questions that put people on the defensive and instead choose phrases that invoke thought and curiosity. Asking questions to strangers is a great way to get them interested in knowing more about you and forming new relationships.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Jonah Berger’s website

Magic Words: What to Say to Get Your Way by Jonah Berger

Jonah Berger | Invisible Influence | AOC Podcast

BetterHelp

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Anger, Compassion, and What It Means To Be Strong | TEDxOlympia

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 13, 2023

01:07:38

The Art of Charm is brought to you by BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/charm today to get 10% off your first month.

In today’s episode, we cover anger and compassion with Russell Kolts, PhD. Russell is Professor of Psychology at Eastern Washington University, an internationally recognized trainer in compassion-focused therapy (CFT), a TedX speaker, and the author of several books on compassion-focused therapy including CFT Made Simple: A Clinician's Guide to Practicing Compassion-Focused Therapy and Buddhist Psychology and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: A Clinician's Guide.

Many men struggle with anger, especially today because society condemns the emotion, so what does it mean to express anger in healthy ways vs unhealthy ways, what can you do to manage your anger effectively, and how can you use self-compassion to ensure your anger doesn’t destroy your relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the biggest misconceptions around compassion and why is compassion important to your ability to dominate life with finesse and courage?
Is it bad to use anger as fuel for action and growth?

How to Manage Anger – 12:40
What exercise can you implement today to make sure you don’t blow up at someone you care about the next time they make you angry?

The worst way to resolve conflict – 22:46
How do you handle conflict and arguments when your anger feels overwhelming?
How do you manage shame effectively?
Why is a problem solving approach problematic in relationship conflicts?

Tools for Building Self Compassion – 41:20
What 2 questions can you ask yourself to develop self compassion so you can be as patient and understanding with yourself as you are with the people you care about?

Self compassion doesn’t come naturally, especially for men, but it’s crucial for not allowing anger to control us. Also, it’s important to recognize the difference between using anger for positive things like motivation for taking action or problem solving versus letting anger consume us. It takes awareness, intention, and practice to be able to show the same compassion to yourself as you do the people you care about. When done effectively, showing compassion can transform any kind of hostile situation into something more meaningful, both in relationships you’re part of and in life in general.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Russell Kolts on Twitter

CFT Made Simple: A Clinician's Guide to Practicing Compassion-Focused Therapy

Buddhist Psychology and Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy: A Clinician's Guide

BetterHelp

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Connor Beaton on Instagram

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Mar 06, 2023

01:30:14

In today’s episode, we cover self mastery with Connor Beaton. Connor is the founder of ManTalks, a TEDx speaker, runs a top ranked podcast called ManTalks, and is the author of Men's Work: A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom.

We are facing a crisis of masculinity, so what can we learn from other cultures when it comes to helping and encouraging boys to become responsible and powerful men, why is it important for men to have strong friendships with other men, and what are modern men missing that lead them to fail in relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why are initiation rituals important for men and what price is society paying for not having initiation rituals?
Why do men abuse power and what can we do to prepare our sons so they don’t abuse power when they become men?

Initiation Rituals – 10:56
Why do cultures across the planet use initiation rituals for young boys to enter into manhood?
How does your self-talk hold you back from being the person you want to be and how do you improve it?
Why is it important to have groups solely for men to be men and talk about men’s issues?

Men and Self Development – 26:14
What is the most important thing men should focus on to achieve and maintain their happiness and fulfillment in life?

The Secret to Non-Neediness in Relationships – 40:05
What are men lacking in their lives that lead them to be needy in romantic relationships, causing those relationships to fall apart?

Initiation rituals have been used throughout history to help transition young boys into manhood. These rites of passage can teach us many things, but the most salient theme that remains is the need for men to face failure and powerlessness so as to enter manhood with a strong sense of self and humility. With positive self-talk we can stop ourselves from believing any false disclosures we face and learn how to think positively and productively. It is also important that men find male-only spaces where they can be men and talk about their issues.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Men's Work: A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom by Connor Beaton

Connor Beaton’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Colin and Garrett’s website

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 27, 2023

01:19:40

In today’s episode, we cover the unsold mindset with Colin Goggins and Garrett Brown. Colin and Garrett are sales leaders, teachers of the popular USC course Sales Mindset for Entrepreneurs, co-founders of Agency18, keynote speakers and guest lecturers, and the authors of The Unsold Mindset: Redefining What It Means to Sell.

Sales can be brutal if you don’t have the right mindset, so what makes the best salespeople so great, what is the one quality you should express in every interaction with a potential customer, and how do you build resilience to push through all the rejection?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What makes for a great salesperson and why don’t the best salespeople consider themselves to be salespeople?

Transformational vs Transactional Sales – 22:10
What is the difference between transformational and transactional sales and which one do customers prefer?
Why is it a strength to be intentionally ignorant when meeting/speaking with customers?
What is the most important quality you can express when interacting with a potential customer?

Rejection and Resiliency – 34:18
What can you do to build resilience in sales so you don’t get hung up on rejection?
What is the difference between toxic positivity and pathological optimism and why is one off putting while the other is necessary to accomplish great things?

Goal Setting – 56:32
How should you view and set goals so they help you rather than hinder you?
How do you find a meaningful purpose in your work when you feel your work is meaningless?

Salespeople are great connectors, and success in sales not only takes hard work but also the right mindset. Building resilience is key to sustaining energy in sales, so techniques like positive self-talk are incredibly important. By setting achievable goals and adopting motivation techniques like vision boards, you’ll be able to tackle any challenges that arise in the workplace. Attitude is everything when it comes to finding purpose and passion in your work; no matter how mundane it may seem, every task can bring joy and meaning if you choose to make it worthwhile.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

The Unsold Mindset: Redefining What It Means to Sell by Colin Coggins, Garrett Brown

Colin and Garrett on Twitter

Colin and Garrett on Instagram

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 20, 2023

01:06:53

In today’s episode, we cover the science of subtraction with Leidy Klotz. Leidy studies the science of design, his research has appeared in both Nature and Science, and his book, Subtract: The Untapped Science of Less, was ranked as one of the most influential titles in the fields of design and behavioral science.

As humans, we gravitate toward acquiring things and activities to add value to our lives, but many times we can add value to our lives by removing things from it—why is our biology working against us, how can you determine what to subtract from your life, and how do you get your family, friends, and coworkers on board?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How can you make your life more fulfilling by removing things from your life?
Why does our biology prime us to add things to our life even if those things don’t enrich our lives?

Reduce Distractions to Increase Fulfillment – 16:28
What questions can you ask to determine what you should remove from your life to improve your life?

What pushes you to add unnecessary things to your life – 31:53
What are the forces around you that are always nudging you to add things to your life that end up unnecessarily complicating your life?

Getting people on board with the concept of subtraction – 44:40
What can you say to people to convince them that removing things from their lives will improve their lives?

Many of us go through life without taking the time to analyze what brings value to our lives and what doesn’t. Our biology drives us to seek out things that we think will make us happy but often those things don’t actually bring long-term fulfillment. Consider evaluating what you have in your life and see if there are any areas where you could declutter your life for more contentment, or to free up time to focus on the things that do bring value to your life. When was the last time you took inventory of your life and considered ways you could simplify?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Additional Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Resources from this Episode

Leidy Klotz’s website

Subtract: The Untapped Science of Less by Leidy Klotz

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Fun Habit: How the Pursuit of Joy and Wonder Can Change Your Life

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 13, 2023

01:15:09

In today’s episode, we cover fun with Mike Rucker. Mike is an organizational psychologist, behavioral scientist, recovering entrepreneur, and the author of The Fun Habit: How the Pursuit of Joy and Wonder Can Change Your Life.

The pursuit of pleasure has been beaten into us as an unhealthy one by many thought leaders throughout history, but what role do fun and leisure play in increasing our productivity, how can you leverage pleasure to make daily work more enjoyable, and what can you do to create more space in your day for pleasurable activities if you find yourself burning out on work?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How does focusing on happiness lead to rumination and depression?

Hedonic Flexibility Principle – 16:02
What role do fun and leisure play in maximizing productivity and life satisfaction?
How important is it to take a sabbatical periodically to recharge and regain a healthy focus on life and work?

Activity Bundling – 34:03
What can you do to add fun and pleasure to your daily activities to make them more enjoyable and thus encourage you to do them better?

Creating Options for Fun in Your Life – 43:28
What little decisions can you make everyday to make your life more fulfilling?
What simple framework can you use to create space in your life to integrate more fun activities and decrease the number of soul-sucking activities?

It is evident that happiness does not necessarily lie in big accomplishments or major life changes, but rather in the small choices we make each day. When we focus on making those choices fun and enjoyable, we are more likely to stick with them and see lasting results. What are some small decisions you can make today to add a little bit of fun and pleasure to your daily routine?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Additional Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Resources from this Episode

Mike Rucker’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Four Horsemen: Criticism, Contempt, Defensiveness, and Stonewalling

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Feb 06, 2023

01:19:37

In today’s episode, we cover peak performance aging with Steven Kotler. Steven is one of the world’s leading experts on human performance, an award-winning journalist, and is a New York Times bestselling author of 11 bestsellers including The Art of Impossible, The Future is Faster Than You Think, Stealing Fire, The Rise of Superman, and Bold and Abundance, and his newest book, Gnar Country: Growing Old, Staying Rad.

Aging gets a bad rep because many people don’t age gracefully, but you don’t have to be one of those many—so what is it about aging that makes us feel old, what is the key to maintaining your youth into old age, and what is the secret to excelling at new skills no matter how old you are?

A Word From Our Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 30, 2023

01:08:38

In today’s episode, we cover the four horsemen of relationship dynamics with AJ, Johnny, and Coach Michael.

We all encounter four dynamics in our personal and professional relationships, so what are they, what is the best way to approach each one to minimize conflict, and in the case of conflict, what makes for the best and worst apologies?

What to Listen For

The Four Horsemen of Relationship Dynamics: Criticism – 0:00
What are the four primary relationship dynamics?
What’s the best way to handle criticism in a relationship?
How do you effectively give criticism in a relationship without angering or upsetting your partner?

Defensiveness – 15:35
What are the 3 ways defensiveness shows up in relationships and how should you approach each one?
What is the worst kind of apology?
What makes a good apology?

Stonewalling – 27:42
What is stonewalling and why does it do so much damage to relationships?
What is the best way to handle a friend or partner who stonewalls in response to potential arguments?

The Final Straw: Contempt – 44:14
What is the best predictor of divorce?
Why do you start feeling contempt for your partner?
What strategies can you use to break the cycle of feeling contempt for someone?

Nobody likes feeling criticized, but it’s an unavoidable part of every relationship and we have to know how to give and receive criticism effectively in order to grow. The key is to learn how to give criticism in a way that doesn’t damage your relationship or make your partner feel defensive. If you can learn how to recognize and manage stonewalling, defensiveness, and contempt, you’ll be on the right track to maintaining a happy and healthy relationship with your partner, friends, family, and coworkers.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Additional Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 23, 2023

01:14:44

In today’s episode, we cover chasing your dreams with Ben Nemtin. Ben is a #1 New York Times bestselling author, co-founder of The Buried Life movement, and inspirational keynote speaker who has delivered over 500 keynotes to brands and Fortune 500 companies.

Introduction

It’s easy to get caught up in the daily grind and forget about all the things we want to accomplish in life, so what can you do to create a bucket list that excites you, surround yourself with people who encourage you to chase your dreams, and share the bucket list in such a way that fires you up and motivates you?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How did The Buried Life tv show get started?

Discomfort Means Growth – 13:36
What are the 3 kinds of people around you who will encourage or discourage you from chasing your dreams?
How do you find people who will support you in accomplishing your goals and dreams?

Creating the Best Bucket List – 25:46
What’s the best way to create a bucket list to accomplish all the things you want to in life?
What should you avoid when planning your bucket list to make sure you actually get your bucket list done?

The Power of Sharing Your Bucket List – 40:14
Why does sharing your bucket list and talking about what’s on your bucket list make it easier for you tackle it?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

The Bucket List Journal

Ben Nemtin’s website

Ben Nemtin on Instagram

The Buried Life

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Avoid These 3 Low Value Behaviors (Toolbox)

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 17, 2023

01:22:29

In today’s episode, we cover quitting with Annie Duke. Annie is a national best-selling author, former professional poker player, corporate speaker, and consultant in the decision-making space, as well as Special Partner focused on Decision Science at First Round Capital Partners, a seed stage venture fund. Annie’s latest book is Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away.

Quitting has acquired a bad reputation in a culture of grit and hustle, but even the most successful people quit things they’re working on frequently, so what is stopping you from quitting a failing project or relationship, and what questions can you ask yourself and others to determine when the right time to quit is?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why is knowing to quit just as important as grit and determination?
How do you know when to quit? – 14:58
Why do many of us quit things too late and waste valuable time that we could be spending on the next success?
What are some great examples of people making the right decision to quit?
Opportunity Cost Neglect – 33:26
What is the blindspot that keeps us from quitting at the right time?
What happened to the game Glitch before Slack was created?
How do you break the Sunk Cost Neglect cycle so you stop wasting your time?
Other Biases and Blindspots – 44:30
What is Escalation of Commitment?
What is the Status Quo Bias?
What is the Omission Comission Bias?
The Questions to Determine When You Need to Quit – 1:01:20

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

A Word From Our Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 09, 2023

01:09:59

In today’s episode, we cover happiness with Dr. Robert Waldinger. Bob is the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, a 75-year-long Harvard study of adult life, and the co-author of The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.

Our social fitness was shaken over the last few years thanks to the lockdown, so what can we use from the longest study on happiness to improve our social fitness and rebuild lost relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How did the “Harvard Happiness Study” come about?
What is the Harvard Study of Adult Development and how did it start?
Social Fitness – 13:01
What is social fitness and how did the pandemic affect your social fitness?
The Biggest Motivation for Self Development – 24:18
What gives you the greatest motivation to improve your life?
What is the secret to happiness and how do you implement it at any age?
How do you make new friends? – 37:11
What should you say when you want to reconnect with someone?
How to stop feeling lonely?
How do you start a conversation with a coworker?
What are unhappy marriages missing? – 46:00
How do happy couples stay happy forever and how can you implement in your relationship?

The Harvard Study of Adult Development turned out to be the longest running study about what makes people happy. Considering the increase in mental health issues and loneliness that we experienced over the last few years, the wisdom learned from the study has the potential to help us recover our pre-pandemic social fitness and get back enjoying life again.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Additional Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Resources from this Episode

Harvard Study of Adult Development website
good-life-book.com/">The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study on Happiness
Dr. Robert Waldinger’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 09, 2023

01:04:44

In today’s episode, we cover happiness with Dr. Robert Waldinger. Bob is the director of the Harvard Study of Adult Development, a 75-year-long Harvard study of adult life, and the co-author of The Good Life: Lessons from the World's Longest Scientific Study of Happiness.

Our social fitness was shaken over the last few years thanks to the lockdown, so what can we use from the longest study on happiness to improve our social fitness and rebuild lost relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How did the “Harvard Happiness Study” come about?
What is the Harvard Study of Adult Development and how did it start?
Social Fitness – 13:01
What is social fitness and how did the pandemic affect your social fitness?
The Biggest Motivation for Self Development – 24:18
What gives you the greatest motivation to improve your life?
What is the secret to happiness and how do you implement it at any age?
How do you make new friends? – 37:11
What should you say when you want to reconnect with someone?
How to stop feeling lonely?
How do you start a conversation with a coworker?
What are unhappy marriages missing? – 46:00
How do happy couples stay happy forever and how can you implement in your relationship?

The Harvard Study of Adult Development turned out to be the longest running study about what makes people happy. Considering the increase in mental health issues and loneliness that we experienced over the last few years, the wisdom learned from the study has the potential to help us recover our pre-pandemic social fitness and get back enjoying life again.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are from referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Harvard Study of Adult Development website
good-life-book.com/">The Good Life: Lessons from the World’s Longest Scientific Study on Happiness
Dr. Robert Waldinger’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Jan 03, 2023

01:07:15

In today’s episode, we cover money and love with Abby Davisson. Abby is a social innovation leader and career development expert, was the president of the Gap Foundation at Gap Inc and a senior leader on the Environmental, Social & Governance team, and is the co-author of Money and Love: An Intelligent Roadmap for Life's Biggest Decisions.

Making big decisions in relationships can be intimidating, so what frameworks and strategies can you use to simplify the decision making process and how should you handle conversations around money and having kids with your partner?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What proven framework should you use to approach major decisions about money and love in relationships?
Thinking about Consequences of Making Big Decisions – 19:06
How should you think about the consequences of decision making?
How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone?
Relationship Compatibility – 29:26
How can you find out if you are compatible with your partner in the long term?
How do you approach the conversation of having kids with someone you just married?
Divorce and Money – 48:30
How should you approach the conversation around money when you’re thinking about getting married?

Making major decisions about relationships can be daunting, but if you break it down with a framework and consider all of the potential consequences with regular communication, it becomes much easier. Money is a major factor to consider when getting married because it can cause a lot of arguments and stress in a relationship, to the point that it is one of the most common reasons people state when getting divorced. If you approach these conversations openly and honestly with your partner, you will be able to make the best decision for both of you.

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Additional Sponsors:

Babbel - https://www.babbel.com/charm

Hello Fresh - https://hellofresh.com/charm65

Athletic Greens - https://athleticgreens.com/charm

NextEvo - https://nextevo.com/charm

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Jan 02, 2023

01:02:00

In today’s episode, we cover money and love with Abby Davisson. Abby is a social innovation leader and career development expert, was the president of the Gap Foundation at Gap Inc and a senior leader on the Environmental, Social & Governance team, and is the co-author of Money and Love: An Intelligent Roadmap for Life's Biggest Decisions.

Making big decisions in relationships can be intimidating, so what frameworks and strategies can you use to simplify the decision making process and how should you handle conversations around money and having kids with your partner?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What proven framework should you use to approach major decisions about money and love in relationships?
Thinking about Consequences of Making Big Decisions – 19:06
How should you think about the consequences of decision making?
How do you know if you want to spend the rest of your life with someone?
Relationship Compatibility – 29:26
How can you find out if you are compatible with your partner in the long term?
How do you approach the conversation of having kids with someone you just married?
Divorce and Money – 48:30
How should you approach the conversation around money when you’re thinking about getting married?

Making major decisions about relationships can be daunting, but if you break it down with a framework and consider all of the potential consequences with regular communication, it becomes much easier. Money is a major factor to consider when getting married because it can cause a lot of arguments and stress in a relationship, to the point that it is one of the most common reasons people state when getting divorced. If you approach these conversations openly and honestly with your partner, you will be able to make the best decision for both of you.

Are you ready to take your career to the next level in 2023? Looking to grow your high-value social circle?

You are one relationship away from changing your entire life.

Listen: your social circle, professional network, and lack of confidence are thwarting your attempts at accelerating your career.

But there’s something you can do about it.

After coaching over 10,000 clients including military special operators and Fortune 500 executives we’ve learned a thing or two about what it actually takes to grow your network. In fact, over 90% of the amazing guests on this show are referrals in our personal networks.

We’ve packaged our best insights inside a course called, Social Capital. And, as a thank you for being a podcast listener, we want to give you this training for FREE to start 2023.

To get your hands on this training and immediately start improving your relationships, go to theartofcharm.com/sc

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Dec 26, 2022

01:03:42

In today’s episode, we cover the Art of Charm’s best episodes from 2022 with AJ and Johnny.

Turbocharge your social skills going into 2023 with highlights from the best of the Art of Charm podcast in 2022!

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Avoid these Low Value Behaviors – 2:41
What 3 behaviors do you need to avoid if you want to attract high value friendships and relationships?
Eye Contact for Different Situations – 16:34
How do you decide what kind of eye contact you should give in personal, professional, and romantic situations?
Overcome Perfectionism – 19:22
What steps can you take to overcome perfectionism?
What are the warning signs that perfectionism is controlling your life?
Setting and Enforcing Boundaries – 28:22
How do you enforce boundaries you set with other people who keep violating your boundaries?
Overcome Nice Guy Syndrome – 38:02
What are covert contracts and why do “nice guys” make them with people they meet?
What is the biggest flaw of nice guys and how do you stop being a “nice guy” if you are one?
The Infamous Awkward Pause – 45:17
How do you make awkward pauses into powerful pauses that command attention?
What mistakes do most people make that kill their charisma?

2022 was a great year here at the Art of Charm. We hope you had a great year as well and wish you nothing but the best in 2023! See you next year!

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

How To Read Body Language | Abbie Maroño

Perfectionism: The Enemy Of Progress | Jennifer Kemp

Build and Maintain Boundaries | Nedra Tawwab

Overcoming Nice Guy Syndrome | Dr. Robert Glover

How to Influence and Persuade People | Zoe Chance

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Avoid These 3 Low Value Behaviors (Toolbox)

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Dec 26, 2022

00:58:27

In today’s episode, we cover the Art of Charm’s best episodes from 2022 with AJ and Johnny.

Turbocharge your social skills going into 2023 with highlights from the best of the Art of Charm podcast in 2022!

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Avoid these Low Value Behaviors – 2:41
What 3 behaviors do you need to avoid if you want to attract high value friendships and relationships?
Eye Contact for Different Situations – 16:34
How do you decide what kind of eye contact you should give in personal, professional, and romantic situations?
Overcome Perfectionism – 19:22
What steps can you take to overcome perfectionism?
What are the warning signs that perfectionism is controlling your life?
Setting and Enforcing Boundaries – 28:22
How do you enforce boundaries you set with other people who keep violating your boundaries?
Overcome Nice Guy Syndrome – 38:02
What are covert contracts and why do “nice guys” make them with people they meet?
What is the biggest flaw of nice guys and how do you stop being a “nice guy” if you are one?
The Infamous Awkward Pause – 45:17
How do you make awkward pauses into powerful pauses that command attention?
What mistakes do most people make that kill their charisma?

2022 was a great year here at the Art of Charm. We hope you had a great year as well and wish you nothing but the best in 2023! See you next year!

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

How To Read Body Language | Abbie Maroño

Perfectionism: The Enemy Of Progress | Jennifer Kemp

Build and Maintain Boundaries | Nedra Tawwab

Overcoming Nice Guy Syndrome | Dr. Robert Glover

How to Influence and Persuade People | Zoe Chance

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Dec 19, 2022

01:10:32

In today’s episode, we cover social media with Dr. Nicholas Kardaras. Dr. Kardaras is an Ivy League educated psychologist, best-selling author, internationally renowned speaker and an expert on mental health, addiction, and the impacts of our digital age.

Social media has gripped us by the neck with socially inept nerds calling the shots, so what exactly is going on, how is social media amplifying mental health issues, and what steps can we take to break social media addiction?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is a social media algorithm and why can they be dangerous to society?
What is the Online Safety Act and how does it serve to protect us from algorithms on social media?
The social world is engineered by the socially inept – 16:42
Why is there so much friction between what is going on in the real world and the virtual world?
How does social media amplify mental health issues and pressure young people to imitate the mentally unwell?
Who should we trust – 28:46
How do we know who to trust online and why is it risky to allow anyone to determine what is true and false?
Are younger generations more fragile than older generations?
Social media and depression – 41:46
How does social media use lead to depression?
Does an easier or harder life lead to a more fulfilling and happy life?
What practical steps can you take to deal with social media addiction?

Social media algorithms are created with the intention of getting users to spend more time on a platform, but they can have harmful consequences. By curating content and limiting the exposure to certain views, social media platforms can create an echo chamber that amplifies mental health issues and leads young people to believe that imitating the mentally unwell is normal behavior. Social media use can lead to depression, anxiety, and other mental health problems.

A Word From Our Sponsors

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Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Dr. Nicholas Kardaras’s website
Digital Madness: How Social Media Is Driving Our Mental Health Crisis--and How to Restore Our Sanity by Dr. Nicholas Kardaras

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Dec 19, 2022

01:05:17

In today’s episode, we cover social media with Dr. Nicholas Kardaras. Dr. Kardaras is an Ivy League educated psychologist, best-selling author, internationally renowned speaker and an expert on mental health, addiction, and the impacts of our digital age.

Social media has gripped us by the neck with socially inept nerds calling the shots, so what exactly is going on, how is social media amplifying mental health issues, and what steps can we take to break social media addiction?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is a social media algorithm and why can they be dangerous to society?
What is the Online Safety Act and how does it serve to protect us from algorithms on social media?
The social world is engineered by the socially inept – 16:42
Why is there so much friction between what is going on in the real world and the virtual world?
How does social media amplify mental health issues and pressure young people to imitate the mentally unwell?
Who should we trust – 28:46
How do we know who to trust online and why is it risky to allow anyone to determine what is true and false?
Are younger generations more fragile than older generations?
Social media and depression – 41:46
How does social media use lead to depression?
Does an easier or harder life lead to a more fulfilling and happy life?
What practical steps can you take to deal with social media addiction?

Social media algorithms are created with the intention of getting users to spend more time on a platform, but they can have harmful consequences. By curating content and limiting the exposure to certain views, social media platforms can create an echo chamber that amplifies mental health issues and leads young people to believe that imitating the mentally unwell is normal behavior. Social media use can lead to depression, anxiety, and other mental health problems.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Dr. Nicholas Kardaras’s website
Digital Madness: How Social Media Is Driving Our Mental Health Crisis--and How to Restore Our Sanity by Dr. Nicholas Kardaras

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Dec 12, 2022

01:05:23

In today’s episode, we cover parenting and the CIA with Christina Hillsberg. Christina is a former CIA intelligence officer, writer, and recognized expert on women in espionage, intelligence tradecraft, and parenting, and the author of License to Parent:

Being a parent is hard enough already and now we have so much technology to worry about, so how do you teach your kids to build trust and to know who to trust, how do you properly regulate their access to video games and the internet, and how do you teach kids to recognize and avoid danger?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What should you study or work toward if you want to eventually work for the CIA or other intelligence agencies?
Teach kids to build relationships – 14:22
How do you teach your kids to deal with bullies in school?
How do you build trust with your kids or stepkids?
Dealing with kids and videogames – 30:30
How do you regulate the access to video games and the internet that your kids have to keep them safe?
How do you teach your kids what information to trust online as well as who to trust online?
Avoiding danger – 42:50
How do you teach your kids to avoid danger?
What can you do to alleviate the worry and anxiety you feel as a parent?

Raising kids in the digital age is a daunting task. It seems like every day we are faced with new challenges and questions about how to keep our children safe and help them grow into well-adjusted adults. But it’s important to remember that we aren’t alone in this struggle. There are plenty of resources available to us, both offline and online, and it’s important to make use of them all.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Dec 05, 2022

01:05:48

In today’s episode, we cover leadership with John Bacon. John is an American journalist, a sports commentator on TV and radio, and author of books on sports and business including his latest best seller Let Them Lead: Unexpected Lessons in Leadership from America's Worst High School Hockey Team.

Coaching a poor performing team to victory is no easy task, so what can you learn from a high school hockey coach who did just that, how high should you set expectations, and what can you do to set them up to lead themselves to success?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why did John Bacon decide to coach the worst high school hockey team in America and how did he take them from losers to champions?
The Value of High Expectations – 15:15
Why is it important to set high expectations for your team?
What does it mean to separate the behavior from the results and why is it important for you to understand if you want to be a great leader?
Rules and Leadership – 30:18
What is the best approach to set rules and regulations as a leader and how can rules hurt your team’s performance?
What’s the best way to deal with parents as a high school athletics coach?
Questions, Questions, Questions – 42:10
How should you handle questions and concerns from your team to get the best out of them?
How to allow your team to lead themselves to achieve their goals?

Leaders should set high expectations for their team and give them the freedom to lead themselves. When team members know what is expected of them, they will be able to work more productively towards common goals. Giving your team the ability to find their own solutions and make decisions will help foster a sense of ownership and responsibility. This in turn can motivate team members to go above and beyond what is expected of them.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Nov 28, 2022

01:14:40

In today’s episode, we cover self-esteem with Dr. Steven Hayes. Steven Hayes is an American clinical psychologist and Nevada Foundation Professor at the University of Nevada, Reno Department of Psychology, where he is a faculty member in their Ph.D. program in behavior analysis, and the author nearly 670 scientific articles and 47 books including the best selling Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life.

The last couple of generations grew up in a world that focused on high self-esteem, but what exactly is self-esteem, why was it catastrophically wrong to focus on it, and what should you strive for when raising kids?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is self-esteem?
Why is it dangerous to artificially inflate self-esteem?
What is that critical voice you hear and how does it affect your self-esteem?
What is confidence – 18:30
Why are many people who appear confident not?
How does social media make it difficult for you to be self compassionate and stay true to yourself?
Stop focusing on self-esteem – 30:20
Why is it catastrophic to focus on teaching kids to have a high self esteem?
What can you do to develop your self-compassion to boost your confidence?
Friends, values, and life fulfillment – 49:42
Why are values important and how do your friends influence your values for better or worse?
Is too much self-compassion a bad thing?

We’ve seen that it can be dangerous to artificially inflate self-esteem and that it is much more important to focus on teaching kids how to have a healthy self-compassion. When we develop our self-compassion, we become better equipped to stay true to ourselves, even when faced with difficult situations or negative feedback from others. With values clarification and by choosing friends who share our positive values, we can work together to encourage each other in living out our best selves.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life by Steven Hayes, Ph. D.
Is Self Compassion More Important Than Self Esteem by Steven Hayes, Ph. D.
Alex Banayan Episode
Self-compassion protects against the negative effects of low self-esteem: A longitudinal study in a large adolescent sample by Sarah Marshall
Steven Hayes TED Talk

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Nov 21, 2022

00:50:43

In today’s episode, we cover becoming unstoppable with Michael Herold.

We all have the potential to achieve unstoppable confidence, but what are the 3 obstacles that stand in your way, what can you do to overcome them, and how do you identify your core values so you can find every day fulfilling?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the 3 obstacles you need to overcome to have unlimited confidence?
What can you do to separate yourself from your thoughts so they don’t get in the way of achieving your goals and dreams?
What question can you ask yourself to instantly quiet your thoughts?
Overcome negative emotions to achieve unstoppable confidence – 18:27
How do you overcome discomfort so you can get the most out of life?
Why do we need to redefine happiness and what should the new definition be so we can pursue a more fulfilling existence?
Find your core values –29:00
What are core values and why are they important for you to find for yourself if you want to live a rich and meaningful life?
Why are goals overrated compared to living a life inline with your core values?
What four ways can you use to identify your core values?

There is a lot you can do to separate yourself from your thoughts and achieve your goals. You need to find what works for you, but some helpful tips are: be mindful of your thoughts, practice meditation or mindfulness, and write out your thoughts and goals regularly. Discomfort is a part of life, but it doesn’t have to stop you from achieving great things. In fact, it’s often through discomfort that we learn and grow the most. Core values are important because they provide a guide for how you want to live your life. They help us make decisions when we’re faced with difficult choices and help us stay on track when things get tough. Identifying your core values is an important step in finding meaning in life.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

The Art of Charm Instant Connection Kit

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Nov 14, 2022

01:10:32

In today’s episode, we cover the pursuit meaning and fulfillment with Yael Schonbrun. Yael is a clinical psychologist, assistant professor at Brown University, co-host of Psychologists Off the Clock, and the author of Work, Parent, Thrive: 12 Science-Backed Strategies to Ditch Guilt, Manage Overwhelm, and Grow Connection (When Everything Feels Like Too Much).

The pursuit of meaning has taken a back seat in the last few decades and we’re paying the price, so what can you do to introduce more meaning into your life, how should you balance meaningful and pleasurable pursuits, and how can you you strengthen the relationships that already give you meaning?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Is it more fulfilling to be great at one role in life or divide your time between multiple roles?
How should you balance the pursuits of meaning, pleasure, and purpose?
Prioritizing the different roles in your life – 16:16
How do you determine which roles you should prioritize in your life when you have to take other people in your life into consideration?
What should you do to preface regular one-on-one check-in conversations with your significant other and kids to strengthen the important relationships in your life?
Strategies to Create Space for Strengthening Relationships – 29:40
What strategies can you implement on a weekly basis to make sure the relationships you care about don’t fall apart?
Adding for improvement vs subtraction for simplicity – 46:54
Should we prioritize adding things to our lives or subtracting things from our lives if we want to be happier and more fulfilled?

It can be difficult to determine how to balance the different pursuits of meaning, pleasure, and purpose in our lives. We often have a lot of competing demands on our time and energy. But if we want to live happier and more fulfilling lives, it’s important that we take the time to figure out what’s most important to us and then put in the effort to make sure those things stay a priority. There is no one perfect answer for everyone – each individual will need to find what works best for them.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Nov 07, 2022

00:59:44

In today’s episode, we cover talking to strangers with AJ and Johnny.

You never know what friend, business partner, or love interest you’ll meet by striking up a conversation with strangers in your daily life, but how do you create engaging conversations with anyone, what two things do you need for great conversations, and how do you make an unforgettable first impression?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How is technology harming our ability to hold conversations and how do we overcome it?
Why is it important to your health and social life to make small talk with strangers?
Simple Techniques for Talking to Strangers – 23:16
What tips can you use to have fun conversations with strangers?
How do you know what to talk about with strangers?
How do you give a compliment to a stranger?
The Art of Charm Conversation Formula – 37:05
What is the formula for great conversations?
How do you have a good conversation with anyone?
What are the two things you need to have great conversations?
Why is vulnerability important in conversations and how can you be vulnerable without being too vulnerable?

Small talk is important because it helps us to get to know other people, learn about new things, and build relationships. It can also help you feel more connected and socialize when you may be feeling lonely or isolated. To know what to talk about with strangers, think about the setting you’re in and try to find a common ground or interest that you share. The formula for great conversations is simple: ask open-ended questions, listen attentively, and then share something personal about yourself. Having a good conversation with anyone is all about being vulnerable and letting your guard down a little bit. Don’t be afraid to share some of your own experiences or feelings, as long as you do so in a way that isn’t overwhelming or off-putting.

A Word From Our Sponsors

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Conversation Magic

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Oct 31, 2022

01:22:39

In today’s episode, we cover masculinity with Richard Reeves. Richard is a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution, where he directs the Future of the Middle Class Initiative and co-directs the Center on Children and Families, and is the author of several books including his latest, Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It.

Western culture is experiencing a masculinity crisis, so what does mature masculinity look like in today’s society, what defines toxic masculinity vs mature masculinity, and how do we start instilling masculinity in our boys?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the trends in education and how are they impacting the genders?
Why is there a lack of male teachers?
The Crisis of Fatherhood – 24:07
What role should fathers play moving forward?
What does mature masculinity look like in modern society and how do we instill it in our children?
Toxic Masculinity – 38:15
What is the difference between mature masculinity and toxic masculinity?
What role do rites of passage play in the transition from boyhood to manhood and what consequences do we face as a culture without them?
Where do we start if we want to revitalize the masculinity in our society?
The Gender Pay Gap is a Parenting Gap – 59:07
What is the reason for the gender pay gap?

Masculinity is not a dirty word. It’s time to reclaim it and redefine it for the modern world. We can start by teaching our children what mature masculinity looks like, modeling healthy behavior ourselves, and creating spaces where men can gather to discuss these issues. Together we can shift the paradigm of toxic masculinity and work towards a more inclusive society that celebrates all forms of masculinity.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Richard Reeves website
Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It by Richard Reeves

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Oct 24, 2022

01:13:58

In today’s episode, we cover social engineering and corporate espionage with Robert Kerbeck. Robert is the founder of the Malibu Writers Circle, his essays and short stories have been featured in numerous magazines and literary journals, and his new memoir, RU$E: Lying the American Dream from Hollywood to Wall Street, is a thrilling look into his career as a secret corporate spy.

Espionage has been around for as long as people have kept secrets, but what do corporate spies do to get information from unsuspecting employees, what should you be on the lookout for to protect yourself and your company, and how do you become a corporate spy?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How do you become a corporate spy?
How do corporate spies prepare for deceptive calls with competitors?
Corporate Espionage Tools of the Trade – 13:36
What is a false time constraint and how do scammers and spies use them to manipulate you?
How do scammers and corporate spies manipulate you to get whatever information they want?
How do corporate spies receive new assignments?
The different ways Corporate Espionage is used – 31:24
How do corporations use corporate spies to find new employees and executive leaders?
How do corporate spies leverage fear to get what they want out of you?

In order to protect yourself from becoming a victim of corporate espionage, it is important to be aware of the tools and tactics that scammers and spies use. By understanding how they operate, you can be better prepared to defend yourself against their attempts to manipulate you into giving away sensitive information. Remember, always be skeptical of unsolicited calls or emails and never give out personal information or passwords without verifying the caller’s identity first.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Robert Kerbeck’s website
RUSE: Lying the American Dream from Hollywood to Wall Street by Robert Kerbeck

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Oct 17, 2022

01:10:42

In today’s episode, we cover hunting discomfort with Sterling Hawkins. Sterling is the CEO and founder of the Sterling Hawkins Group, a research, training and development company focused on human and organizational growth, and is the author of Hunting Discomfort: How to Get Breakthrough Results in Life and Business No Matter What.

Discomfort is an inevitable aspect of getting anywhere in life, so what are the 5 kinds of discomfort we all face, what are the ways we all deal with discomfort that make it worse, and how can you leverage discomfort to turn your dreams into a reality?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why do you risk everything you’ve worked for when you avoid discomfort?
What are the 3 default ways we try to deal with discomfort that only make the discomfort worse?
How to Evolve through Discomfort – 11:20
What can you do to adopt a mindset that embraces discomfort and leverages discomfort to evolve as a person?
What are the 3 kinds of beliefs and how do they drive everything you do?
Hunting Discomfort vs Danger – 20:11
What is the difference between seeking out discomfort and doing dangerous things because they’re dangerous?
What are the 5 types of discomforts we all face?
The Necessity of Discomfort – 40:50
What can you commit to in order to force yourself to get comfortable with discomfort?

Discomfort is a part of life. It’s what we do with discomfort that determines whether or not it will have a negative impact on our lives. When we avoid discomfort, we risk everything we’ve worked for. But when we embrace discomfort, we can grow as individuals and achieve things we never thought possible. So how do you start embracing discomfort? You can start by making a commitment to yourself get comfortable with discomfort. And then you can begin to experiment with different ways of introducing discomfort into your everyday life so that it becomes a regular part of your existence. Are you ready to take the challenge?

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Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Oct 10, 2022

01:00:19

In today’s episode, we cover the different work genius skills with Patrick Lencioni. Patrick is founder and president of The Table Group, a firm dedicated to helping leaders improve their organizations’ health and the author of ten business books including his most recent work, The 6 Types of Working Genius: A Better Way to Understand Your Gifts, Your Frustrations, and Your Team.

Knowing what kind of work your personality is inclined toward can make the difference between loving your work and hating it, having an innovative team and a failing team, so what are the different types of work and how can you leverage them to achieve incredible success?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why do we get frustrated at work and what is triggering this?
What are the skills necessary to fully function in any work environment?
Different Kinds of Working Genius – 5:32
What are the different types of working skills we already have and the skills we still need to develop?
What are the benefits of learning and knowing how these skills can change our work environment?
What Type of Worker Are You? – 18:28
How do you behave within the team and how do you react to different situations?
Are you tenacious, love to push things forward, and make sure they get done?
Interpreting the Assessment Results – 32:54
What can you do when you think your co-workers are outsmarting and outperforming you?
What is the concept of quiet-quitting and why is it causing companies to lose their genius talents?

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Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

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Oct 03, 2022

01:06:01

In today’s episode, we cover the science behind the hidden power of relationships with AJ and Johnny.

The people in your life can you lead you to success or failure, joy or frustration—so how do you know what influence people and their friends are having on your life, how can you be a high value person to attract high value friendships and relationships, and what steps can you take to upgrade your social circle?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What influence do the people around you have on your happiness and ability to achieve your goals?
How do you handle relationships that have a negative influence on your life?
High Value vs Low Value Behavior – 10:55
What does it mean to be high value and why should you avoid low value behaviors if you don’t want to lose great friendships and relationships?
What are the benefits of being high value as much as possible?
Inescapable Influence of Friends and Family – 23:01
How can your life be influenced by the friends of friends you don’t even know and what can you do to mitigate the harm they cause?
Can you filter out the negative influences of certain friends so you can keep them around for the positive influences?
Curate Your Social Circle – 47:30
What steps can you take to upgrade your existing social circle so your friends, family members, and coworkers support you rather than bring you down?
What is the difference between venting and gossiping and how should you respond to each one?

Other people are capable of having a significant impact on your life. If you let them, the right ones can set up conditions for success while leaving behind only pleasant memories and happy moments in their wake - but how do we determine which individuals will provide us with these opportunities? And more importantly: what can we do when our friends begin steering clear-cut paths towards failure or discontentment instead by trying to guide themselves into successful futures through less than honest means such as cheating at sports games etc.

A Word From Our Sponsors

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Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

What Are Social Skills? A Value Vampire Has No Clue

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Sep 26, 2022

01:06:30

In today’s episode, we cover conscious conversations with Chuck Wisner. Chuck is a business and personal consultant and an advisor to leaders in high-profile companies in several industries such as Google, Rivian, Apple, and Tesla, and is the author of The Art of Conscious Conversations: Transforming How We Talk, Listen, and Interact.

Conversations are an important aspect of running a business with employees, so what conversations should you be having with your employees and what types of questions should you ask?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How many different kinds of conversations are there and why do you need to know them all?
Advocacy vs Inquiry – 22:55
Why is it important to balance advocacy for yourself and inquiring about others?
The 4 Questions to Ask in Conversations – 34:16
What kinds of questions should you ask yourself when you’re talking to someone if you want to spark more engaging conversations?
Conversational Bypass – 48:30
Why is it important to touch on all four types of conversations in business and planning meetings in order to get the most out of your team?

The next time you’re in a meeting, think about how you can use all four conversation types to get your point across. When you advocate for yourself and inquire about others, it will create a more balanced and engaging discussion. Asking the right questions of yourself before talking to someone can help set the tone for a more productive exchange. Touching on all four conversation types is important in business because it allows for different perspectives to be explored and helps everyone feel heard.

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Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Sep 19, 2022

01:15:02

In today’s episode, we cover groundedness with Brad Stulberg. Brad coaches executives, entrepreneurs, physicians, and athletes on health, well-being, and sustainable excellence, and is the bestselling author of The Practice of Groundedness: A Transformative Path to Success that Feeds -- Not Crushes -- Your Soul.

Being present is harder than ever in a world with a million things fighting for our attention, so what can you do to stay grounded in a world of distractions, what mindset can you adopt to work hard without burning out, and build a community that keeps your carries your momentum forward?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is groundedness and what does it mean to practice groundedness?
The Principles of Groundedness – 10:22
What practice can you implement to accept where you are in the moment so you can make better decisions about where to go next?
What is the best thing you can do if you feel like you’re in a hole and time has slowed down to a crawl?
The Key to Feeling Good and Being Happy – 20:31
What piece of ancient wisdom is repeated throughout history when it comes to feeling good and being happy?
What can you do to limit the distractions in your life so you can start your day productively and with a clear mind?
Vulnerability and Confidence – 41:50
How can you leverage vulnerability to build more confidence?
What is deep community and how does it help you achieve groundedness?

When it comes to happiness, feeling good, and crushing life, there is one ancient wisdom that keeps popping up throughout history. That ancient wisdom is groundedness. Groundedness means living in the present moment, being connected to your body and your surroundings, and having a clear mind. It’s about being fully aware of what is happening around you and within you. Practicing groundedness can help you limit distractions so you can start your day productively, build more confidence by leveraging vulnerability, and feel happier and more content in life. What will you do today to start living more grounding?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Sep 12, 2022

01:12:27

In today’s episode, we cover leadership and motivation with Dan Luna. Dan formed 3LX Consulting in 2019 to empower leaders through coaching products that combine academics, consulting, and coaching, after a twenty-year career in the United States Navy SEAL Teams.

Leadership is a skill that requires conscious effort to develop, but how do we define leadership, what daily practices can you utilize to improve your leadership, and what can you do to lead and motivate your team to achieve their potential?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does leadership mean to a Navy SEAL?
Leadership Skill Transference – 10:42
How do you transfer your leadership skills from one area of your life to another?
What can you do to develop self-awareness so you know where you are lacking when it comes to leadership?
How to Start Journaling for Leadership Development – 30:51
What can you do start journaling from a leadership perspective to develop your leadership skills?
How do You Motivate Other Leaders – 43:10
How do we define motivation so we are better able to motivate other leaders and team members?
What areas can we highlight for team members to help them uncover the motivation to achieve their goals?
What can you do to give great feedback people will listen to?

Leaders are not born but they are made. You can become a better leader by taking the time to journal your thoughts and experiences from a leadership perspective. This will help you develop an understanding for what motivates you and how you can motivate others. When it comes to giving feedback, make sure that you take the time to understand the person’s perspective before offering any criticism. Feedback is most effective when it is specific, actionable, and positive.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Sep 05, 2022

01:17:51

In today’s episode, we cover the concept of belonging with Geoffrey Cohen. Cohen is the James G. March Professor of Organizational Studies in Education and Business, professor of psychology and, by courtesy, at the Graduate School of Business at Stanford University, and the author of Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides.

Humans are social creatures and our health is tied to our social bonds, so what happens when we lose the sense of belonging, what can you do to improve your ability to foster that connection with others, and how do you develop the empathy necessary to connect with people from all walks of life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does it mean to belong and what happens to us when we don’t feel a sense of belonging?
Situation Crafting – 20:48
What is situation crafting and how can you leverage it to accomplish your goals?
What simple tricks can you use to accelerate your progress toward changing or improving your behavior?
Turning Knowledge into Action – 35:30
How do you take information you learn in one area and apply it to other areas of your life to save time and energy?
What are the three ingredients necessary to effect change on an individual level?
How to connect with people across different beliefs – 45:10
What obstacles get in the way of connecting with people who have different beliefs than your own?
How do you develop empathy for cultures or belief systems you have no experience with?

We all want to feel like we belong, that we are a part of something larger than ourselves. When we don’t have that sense of belonging, it can be damaging both mentally and emotionally. But what if there were ways to create a sense of belonging for yourself? What if you could use the power of situation crafting to your advantage? There are simple tricks you can use to get started on this journey and develop empathy for cultures or belief systems that are new to you. The bottom line is that developing a sense of belonging is crucial to our well-being as humans. With the right tools and information, you can find belonging in even the most difficult situations.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Aug 29, 2022

01:06:17

In today’s episode, we cover navigating college and your career with Belle Liang and Timothy Klein. Belle is a professor of Counseling Psychology and Principal Investigator in the Purpose Lab and Tim is an award-winning urban educator, clinical therapist and school counselor, and together they wrote How to Navigate Life: The New Science of Finding Your Way in School, Career, and Beyond.

Society places a ton of pressure on kids to follow a certain path through life, but does that path set them up for success or failure, what mindset should we be instilling in kids before they choose a college, and why is the pursuit of happiness leading them away from a fulfilling life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What mindset do we learn at an early age that sets us up for failure?
What is the career and college navigation crisis?
What’s wrong with how we perceive higher education – 12:20
What do we get wrong about guiding students into the higher education system and what should we do to set teens up for success after high school?
The Three Mindsets for Success – 18:50
What are the three mindsets you need to chart the correct path through higher education?
Why is it a bad idea to follow your passions?
Why is it important to balance passion with performance and purpose?
The Value of Being Purpose-Driven – 34:00
What does it mean to live with purpose and how do you figure out what your purpose is in college?

Committing to only pursuing your passion places an unnecessary focus on only doing things that make you feel good and avoiding discomfort and hard work. That is the same as living a life in strict pursuit of happiness. If we chase happiness as a goal in life there will always be a gap between where we are now and the happiness we desire. That leads to a constant state of never being happy enough, thus defeating the purpose of trying to lead a happy life.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

How to Navigate Life: The New Science of Finding Your Way in School, Career, and Beyond by Belle Liang and Timothy Klein
How To Navigate Life website

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Aug 22, 2022

01:02:46

In today’s episode, we cover quieting your inner critic with AJ, Johnny, and Michael.

We all have an inner critic for a reason, so what is that reason, what is it doing to stop you from living your dream life, and what tools can you implement today to quiet your inner critic and start leading the life you deserve?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why do we have an inner critic and what purpose is it supposed to serve?
Quieting your inner critic – 24:30
What are the benefits of quieting your inner critic?
The tools to quiet your inner critic – 34:30
What can you do to quiet your inner critic?
How do you use self-compassion to make your inner critic into a supportive voice for growth and development?

Do you find yourself losing the battle with your inner critic? That inner critic is there to save us from danger from how much danger are you genuinely in on a daily basis? The first mistake many people make is treating their inner critic as if that voice knows what is best for them. Rather than taking your inner critic seriously, start by asking yourself, “The way my inner critic is speaking to me now, would I talk like to my best friend?”

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

David Goggins & The Art of Mastering Your Mindset

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Aug 15, 2022

01:09:37

In today’s episode, we cover peak performance with Steve Magness. Steve was two seconds away from breaking the 4 minute mile, he is a world-renowned expert on performance, coauthor of Peak Performance, and the author of the new book Do Hard Things: Why We Get Resilience Wrong.

Performing at your best will attract countless opportunities in all areas of your life, but expectations and poor goal setting will hold you back, so what can you do to set the correct goals and expectations for yourself and how do you build the resilience necessary to achieve your potential?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How do expectations alter the way we live our lives without us being consciously aware of it?
What does toughness mean today? – 19:36
What is the difference between safety and security and how has the confusion between the two led to weaker humans?
Transition from discomfort to action – 33:01
How do you take the discomfort you feel in a situation and convert it into meaningful action and goal setting?
Goal setting and training resilience – 40:07
Why do many of us set goals that lead us to fail and how can we set goals that pull us to success instead?
How do you train resilience?

Expectations play a huge role in our lives, and often we aren't even consciously aware of them. Our expectations can lead us to discomfort, but if we learn how to convert that discomfort into meaningful action and goal setting, we can achieve our potential. Setting goals is an important part of this process, but it's essential to be realistic about what we can achieve and not set ourselves up for failure. With the right mindset and some practice, we can all work towards building a more resilient self. What are you going to do today that will help you meet your long-term goals?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Aug 08, 2022

01:13:37

In today’s episode, we cover leadership with Dr. Karyn Gordon. Dr. Karyn Gordon is the CEO and co-founder of DK Leadership, a TED Talk speaker, and the Wall Street Journal Bestselling author of The Three Chairs: How Great Leaders Drive Communication, Performance, and Engagement.

Leadership skills are great for anyone to have, but they are crucial if you want to get ahead professionally, so what are the signs you need to work on your leadership skills, what can you do to work on them, and what’s the best way to ask for feedback so you know you’re improving?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the five components of emotional intelligence?
Signs your leadership skills are lacking – 18:11
What are some signs you need to work on your leadership skills before you shoot for a leadership position?
What exercise can you do with your team at work to identify weak spots in your leadership skills?
The best way to ask for feedback – 24:45
What can you do to ask your manager or supervisor for feedback that shows your willingness to excel within the company?
What are the three chairs of leadership? – 41:03
Who has the hardest time setting boundaries and what can you do to improve your ability to set better boundaries?

Leaders with a high emotional intelligence can inspire their followers to achieve great things. If you’re aspiring to be a leader, or are currently in a leadership position and feel like you could use some improvement, start by working on your emotional intelligence. There are many ways to do this, but one of the best is simply to ask for feedback. Let your manager or supervisor know that you want to excel within the company and that you’re willing to work hard to improve any areas where they see potential for growth. Then take that feedback and turn it into action. Finally, remember that setting boundaries is an important part of being a good leader. It can be difficult to say no sometimes, but it’s crucial if you want to maintain your own sanity (and health) while leading others.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Aug 01, 2022

01:08:53

In today’s episode, we cover the value of sorrow and longing with Susan Cain. Susan is the author of the Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking, and her newest book Bittersweet: How Sorrow and Longing Make Us Whole is focused on sorrow and longing as inspiration to experience sublime emotions opposed to the constant positivity expected by society.

Modern society reinforces the idea that we should strive to be positive in everything we do, but is positivity always better for you, why do we then seek forms of entertainment that evoke feelings like sadness, and how should we treat these emotions that society tells us we need to dismiss or get over?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Is there a link between creativity and melancholy?
What is the difference between melancholy and depression and why does one support creativity while the other suppresses it?
Why are we drawn to entertainment that evokes sadness – 15:21
What is it about sadness and beauty that we are drawn to?
Why is it important to have a creative outlet for our emotions and what consequences do we risk by not pursuing a healthy outlet?
What is the best way to process grief?
What can leaders do to provide a healthy work environment – 29:48
What can you do to support your employees to minimize the chances of burnout and poor productivity?
How do you figure out what you want to do with your life – 39:00
What should you do if you’re worried about hitting the milestones everyone expects of you (career, marriage, house, kids, etc)?
How to figure out what you want to do with your life?
The state of introversion vs extraversion – 49:12
What has changed in society with respect to understanding and empowering introverts?

It’s important to take care of our mental health and process our emotions in a healthy way. It’s also crucial that we don’t shy away from the things that make us feel sad or down. There is something powerful and beautiful about sadness, and when we allow ourselves to explore it we can often find new ways of looking at the world and new sources of inspiration.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Jul 25, 2022

00:58:47

In today’s episode, we cover emotion efficacy with Dr. Aprilia West. Dr. West is a psychologist and executive and team leadership coach who works extensively with artists, creatives, and entertainment execs to increase their emotional intelligence, psychological flexibility, and resilience.

Emotions influence our thoughts and actions everyday, so what can you do to understand them, understand where they come from, and understand how to manage them so they don’t lead you to make harmful decisions?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is emotion efficacy?
What is the emotional default world and how does it shape your behavior?
The importance of emotion efficacy – 13:33
What is the difference between feelings and emotions?
The signs of low emotion efficacy – 27:00
How do you know if you have low emotion efficacy?
What questions can you ask yourself to understand where you have room to grow emotionally?
Five Steps to Increase Emotion Efficacy – 35:10
What can you do to increase your emotion efficacy?
What does it look like to have great emotion efficacy in times of intense uncertainty?
The Loneliness Epidemic – 40:05
What role does emotion efficacy play in your ability to connect with others and build friendships?

Emotion efficacy is the ability to understand your emotions and express them in a healthy manner. It’s what allows you to stay in a positive emotional state and navigate challenging situations. In times of intense uncertainty, it can be one of the most important things you possess.

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Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Dr Aprilia West’s website
What You Feel Is Not All There Is by Dr. Aprilia West
Dr Aprilia West on Instagram

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Jul 18, 2022

00:59:48

In today’s episode, we cover narcissism with Lily Walford. Lily is an international dating coach and the survivor of a toxic narcissistic relationship.

Narcissists are all around us and can cause untold harm to our mental wellbeing, so what can you do to identify and disarm narcissists, how can you tell if you’re in a relationship with one, and what should you look for to avoid getting into a relationship with one?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does narcissism look like?
How to identify narcissists – 15:30
What signs can you look for if you think you’re dating a narcissist?
How do you know if someone is a narcissist?
Self-care after a relationship with a narcissist – 24:05
What can you do to take care of yourself after a toxic relationship with a narcissist?
Disarming Narcissists – 31:15
What can you to disarm a narcissist?
How will a narcissist stop you from disarming him or her?
Dating after a narcissist – 41:07
What 4 elements should you look for in a healthy relationship?
What can you do to reinvigorate a relationship?

Narcissists tend to be charismatic and successful. If you surround yourself with top performers, chances are there is a narcissist among them. So it’s important to be able to identify them before they wreak havoc on your personal and professional life. Additionally, there are steps you can take to disarm narcissists so they lose their power over you and the people around you. And if you find yourself dating a narcissist, make sure you take time after the relationship to identify what went wrong and be on the lookout for the 4 elements of a healthy relationship so you don’t end up dating another narcissist.

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Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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Jul 11, 2022

01:19:40

In today’s episode, we cover the science of competition with Ashley Merryman. Ashley is the Non-Resident Senior Fellow for the Joint Special Operations University and author of Top Dog: The Science of Winning and Losing.

Competition can be healthy and unhealthy, so how do you know the difference between healthy and unhealthy competition, what are the differences between how introverts and extroverts handle competition, and how does gender play a role in competition?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the biggest myths surrounding competition and trying to be number one?
What are the benefits of competition?
Healthy vs Unhealthy Competition – 9:00
What is the difference between healthy competition and unhealthy competition?
Where does the fear of failure come from?
Overcome Fear of Failure – 15:30
What is the difference between a challenge and a threat and how can one lead you to failure while the other leads to success?
What can you do to overcome the fear of failure when you know people are watching you?
Don’t Think About Pink Elephants – 29:40
What can you do to start being competitive again after a severe loss?
What are the differences between men and women when it comes to competition and competitive environments?
What role does gender play in competition?
Introverts vs Extroverts in Competition – 56:20
Why do introverts and extroverts approach competition differently and how can you use that knowledge to improve your ability to compete whether you are an introvert or extrovert?

Competition can be a powerful motivator, but it’s important to make sure that you are using it in a healthy way. When competition becomes destructive and fear-based, it ruins our relationships and keeps us from achieving our goals. By understanding your own tendencies and working on overcoming your fears, you can learn to use competition in a positive way that unlocks your full potential.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Top Dog: The Science of Winning and Losing by Ashley Merryman
Ashley Merryman’s website
Ashley Merryman on Twitter

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Jul 04, 2022

00:56:19

In today’s episode, we cover networking to survive the recession with AJ and Johnny.

People rely on those they trust in times of economic hardship, so what can you do to grow your network before the next economic downturn and what value can you offer to strengthen your existing network so you’re in a better position when the next recession hits?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why is networking so important when you’re starting in a new field or trying to move up in your current field?
Why is a strong network important to have before a recession begins?
What everyone gets wrong about networking – 13:03
How do you network effectively so you’re not shooting yourself in the foot at every networking event?
What is social capital and why do you need to understand it to network effectively?
What three ways can you provide value to anyone in your network?
The 4 levels of support value you can offer to anyone – 23:20
What can you do to stand out from the crowd when congratulating or supporting someone in your network?
Leverage your network to provide value to others – 33:50
How can you use your existing network to grow it while also offering value to people inside and outside of your network?
What simple strategy can you use to grow your network from nothing on LinkedIn?

It’s not a question of if the next recession will hit, but when. So, it’s important to start building your network now. A strong network can help you weather any storm. The more people you know in different industries and positions, the more resources you have at your disposal. Social capital is key to networking effectively; make sure you understand what it is and how to use it to your advantage.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

How to Attract High Value People & Opportunities | Toolbox

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Jun 27, 2022

00:56:14

In today’s episode, we cover with Angie Morgan. Angie is the co-author of Bet on You: How to Win with Risk, a book about discovering the formula for success and decision-making confidence to transform even the most risk-averse mindset.

We have to take risks in order to become great at anything, but what do you do if that risk stops you dead in your tracks, who should you seek out for advice, and how can you manage risk so you can accomplish your dreams?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How do you break something down that appears to be a large risk?
Who are the three types of people you should look out for when getting advice on a big risk you want to take, and who should you avoid?
How to Find High Value Communities – 13:05
Where can you go to find high value communities that will support you and help you on your journey to achieve your dreams?
How to Grow Your Confidence – 20:20
What are the three components of confidence you need to focus on in order to become more confident?
How to Mitigate Big Risk – 39:30
What three strategies can you implement to effectively manage the risks you take in life?

When it comes to making big decisions, it’s important to get advice from the right people. Seek out those who will give you honest feedback and support you on your journey. Avoid getting bogged down by negative people or those who are not willing to help you achieve your dreams. With the right mindset and a supportive community, anything is possible. What risks are you ready to take in order to achieve your goals?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Bet on You: How to Win with Risk by Angie Morgan

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Jun 20, 2022

00:54:48

In today’s episode, we cover building high value relationships with AJ & Johnny.

Building high value relationships requires vulnerability, but what does it mean to be vulnerable, how do you know when to be vulnerable, and what are some simple strategies you can use to be more effective in relationship building?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why is it important to build high value relationships?
How do you start making new friends?
Turn Small Talk into Smart Talk – 12:00
Why is vulnerability important when building connections with people?
How do you bring vulnerability into your social interactions?
The Three Levels of Vulnerability – 17:00
What is the first level of vulnerability and how do you know when to use it?
How do you know when to go to the deepest level of vulnerability?
What red flags should you look for in the way people react to your vulnerability?
The Cave Analogy of Vulnerability – 37:50
Why is it important to lead with vulnerability before expecting others to be vulnerable?

We hope that you walk away from this episode feeling empowered to build high value relationships with others. By being vulnerable and authentic, we create opportunities for true connection and intimacy. When we lead with vulnerability, it sets the tone for a more open and connected relationship in which both parties can be their true selves. What are you waiting for? Start building those connections today!

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

The Strength of Weak Ties by Mark S. Granovetter
Art of Charm Small Talk Cheat Sheet

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Jun 13, 2022

01:08:38

In today’s episode, we cover social engineering with Christopher Hadnagy. Chris is an IT entrepreneur, IT security consultant, and the best-selling author of five books including his latest Human Hacking: Win Friends, Influence People, and Leave Them Better Off for Having Met You.

Social engineering is an effective tool to get what you want, but what is social engineering, how can you use it to instantly build rapport with complete strangers, and what should you look for if you think someone is using it against you?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is social engineering and how do people use it every day?
How to Build Rapport – 10:10
Why is it important to learn how to build rapport and how do you go about learning it?
The Four Questions of Trustworthiness – 25:18
What are the four questions we ask ourselves to determine whether or not we can trust someone?
How can you build rapport instantly with someone you’ve just met?
When is flattery NOT ok? – 41:30
When should you avoid complimenting someone?
What’s the best way to compliment someone?

Social engineering is a powerful tool that can be used in positive or negative ways. By learning how to build rapport, you can use social engineering for good – to make connections with people, learn their stories, and understand them better. When you know how to spot red flags and protect yourself against social engineers, you become a more informed and empowered individual who can help keep themselves and others safe.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Human Hacking: Win Friends, Influence People, and Leave Them Better Off for Having Met You by Christopher Hadnagy
engineer.com/">Christopher Hadnagy’s website
Christopher Hadnagy on Twitter

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Jun 06, 2022

01:03:07

In today’s episode, we cover contextual behaviorism with Dr. Emily Sandoz. Emily is a professor of social sciences in the psychology department at the University of Louisiana at Lafayette, the director of the Louisiana Contextual Science Research Group, as well as the Editor in Chief of the Journal of Contextual Behavioral Sciences, and has co-authored three books on acceptance and commitment therapy.

Changing or eliminating problematic behavior is not as simple as flipping a switch, but what role does your environment play, how can you identify contextual problems in your daily life that are affecting your behavior, and what is the best way to learn new behaviors?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is contextual behaviorism and how does the environment influence your ability to change your behavior?
Using – 11:50
How can you use contextual behaviorism to change your problematic behavior?
What does it mean to have access to certain behaviors and how do you what behaviors you do have access to?
Learning new behaviors – 23:07
What is the best way to learn new behaviors?
How can you use contextualism to manage your perfectionism?
Give better advice with context in mind – 33:00
How can you set up your environment to be more conducive to the life you want?
How do you shift from a goal-driven mindset to a value-driven mindset and what’s the difference?

Context matters. That couldn’t be more true than with our behavioral development. Our behaviors impact the world around us and the world around us impacts our behaviors. So if you’re struggling to change your behaviors, one of the best places to look for a solution is your environment. What is it about your environment that is making it more difficult for you to change?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

behavior.org/emily-sandoz-phd/">Dr. Emily Sandoz

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May 30, 2022

00:57:24

In today’s episode, we cover high value behaviors with AJ and Johnny.

Being a high value person opens doors to opportunities you never thought possible, so what does it mean to be high value, what high value behaviors should you look for in yourself and others, and what simple steps can you take to filter high value people into your life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why are high value behaviors important if you want to have a healthy social circle and fulfilling life?
What does it mean to be high value – 16:10
What is the difference between high and low value behaviors and why should you avoid low value behaviors if you don’t want to be miserable?
How do you deal with friends who want to hold you back when you’re trying to grow and be a better person?
How to Build a High Value Social Circle – 28:00
What steps can you take to build and maintain a social circle of high value individuals who will support you and be there for you when you need them?
Examples of High Value Behavior – 37:50
How can you identify high value behavior in the people around you so you know who to connect with and who to avoid?

So, what are high value behaviors? They’re the things that help us grow and become better people. They make our lives more fulfilling and meaningful. And they attract other high value individuals into our social circles. We all want to be happy and have a good life, but too often we get stuck around low value behavior that keeps us from reaching our goals. If you want to break out of this cycle and build a better life for yourself, start by making some changes in the way you interact with the people around you. Replace low value behaviors with high value ones, and surround yourself with positive people who will support your growth. It won’t be easy, but it’s worth it.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Avoid These 3 Low Value Behaviors (Toolbox)

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May 23, 2022

00:59:04

In today’s episode, we cover winning your breakup with Natasha Adamo. Natasha is a high-performance coach, relationship coach, speaker, blogger with over two and a half million readers, and the author of Win Your Breakup: How to Be The One That Got Away.

Breakups can be painful and get drawn out, so what can you do win your breakup, what does it mean to win, and how can you avoid falling into another toxic relationship?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the signs of toxic relationships?
How do you win your breakup?
Breaking the Toxic Relationship Cycle – 19:48
How do you break the cycle of jumping from one toxic relationship to another?
What signs should you look for in a potential partner?
Stay on your white horse after a breakup – 27:20
What steps should you take after a breakup to speed up the recovery process?
What should you avoid doing after a breakup if you want to move on?
Emotional Entrepreneurship – 45:36
What is an emotional entrepreneur and why are people drawn to emotional entrepreneurs?

Winning a breakup is not about getting your ex back. It's about gaining back control of your life and becoming emotionally stronger. So how do you win? You need to understand what it means to win. Identify the signs of toxic relationships, break the cycle of jumping from one toxic relationship to another, and take steps to speed up the recovery process..

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Natasha Adamo’s website
Win Your Breakup: How to Be The One That Got Away by Natasha Adamo

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May 16, 2022

01:03:03

In today’s episode, we cover mental health with Lori Gottlieb. Lori is a psychotherapist in Los Angeles, co-host of the podcast Dear Therapists, and the author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone.

Mental health is a priority now more than ever, so what are the overlooked signs that someone is struggling with mental health, how do you know if you should talk to a professional, and why is boundary setting crucial to positive mental health?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the overlooked signs that someone is struggling with mental health issues?
What is the value in seeing a therapist versus talking to your friends and family about issues you’re experiencing in life?
The self-sabotaging stories we tell ourselves – 11:12
Why do we tell ourselves stories about what happens to us and how do those stories have lasting negative impacts on us and the people around us?
What impact do the people around us have on our mental health and what can you do if your friends aren’t healthy for you?
Setting and maintaining boundaries – 24:24
How do you set boundaries and maintain them with people who constantly violate them?
Finding the right person – 47:05
What is the number one question you should ask yourself when on a first date?

Mental health is something many people struggle with, but often don’t talk about. The signs that someone is struggling can be easily overlooked if you’re not aware of them. It’s important to be there for your loved ones and help them get the help they need if you see any of these signs. If you’re experiencing mental health issues, it’s valuable to seek out therapy. Friends and family are great sources of support, but sometimes talking to somebody neutral who isn’t invested in our lives can be really helpful, even lifesaving.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

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May 09, 2022

01:03:00

In today’s episode, we cover influence with Zoe Chance. Zoe is a teacher, writer, researcher, climate philanthropist, earned her doctorate from Harvard, teaches Mastering Influence and Persuasion, the most popular class at the Yale School of Management, and is the author of Influence is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen.

Influencing the people around you is a superpower, but how do you develop that ability through your charisma, what common mistakes are you making that kill your charisma, and what is the most important skill you need to influence people?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why is your ability to influence others a superpower?
What are the three paradoxes of charisma?
Anti-charismatic statements – 15:15
What are diminishing statements, why do so many of us use them, and how do they kill your charisma?
Charming vs Manipulating – 23:14
How can you tell the difference between people using strategies and tactics to build genuine connections and using them to manipulate others to get what they want?
How do you say no if you’re a people pleaser and what can you do to get comfortable with saying no?
What does it mean to reframe something? – 32:30
What is reframing and why is it a powerful tool in communication?
What is the worst way to try and get someone to see your point of view?
The levels of listening – 47:30
What are the 5 levels of listening, and which level is the most important if you’re trying to connect with someone?

You have the ability to influence others, and that is a superpower. It’s time to start using your power for good. When you become aware of diminishing statements and how they kill your charisma, you can start reframing your communication in order to build genuine connections with the people around you. With practice, this will become second nature, and you’ll be able to use your newfound superpower for good in all areas of your life.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Influence Is Your Superpower: The Science of Winning Hearts, Sparking Change, and Making Good Things Happen By Zoe Chance

Zoe Chance’s website

Give and Take: Why Helping Others Drives Our Success by Adam Grant

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The ACT Workbook for Perfectionism

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May 02, 2022

01:02:12

In today’s episode, we cover metabolic health with Dr Philip Ovadia. Dr. Ovadia is a board certified Cardiac Surgeon, founder of Ovadia Heart Health, and the author of Stay Off My Operating Table: A Heart Surgeon’s Metabolic Health Guide to Lose Weight, Prevent Disease, and Feel Your Best Every Day.

What you put into your body has a direct impact on your metabolic health, but what is metabolic health, why is it important, and what can you do to support a strong metabolic health so you don’t end up on the operating table or in an early grave?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is metabolic health and how does it impact the other areas of your life including mental health?
The big medical myths – 13:17
What is the biggest medical myth that is making us more unhealthy every year?
Should we be consuming supplements?
How did unhealthy food become so normalized that we serve it in hospitals where we’re supposed to go to get better?
The 5 metrics of Metabolic Health – 26:09
What metrics should you and your doctor pay attention to if you want to avoid ending up on the operating table?
What is the biggest pitfall of intermittent fasting and what can you do to work around it?
Nutrition and Metabolic Health – 35:44
What should you eat to support your metabolic health and what should you avoid?
How do nutrition and your metabolic health affect your mental well being?

It’s clear that metabolic health is critical for overall well-being. Unfortunately, unhealthy food has become normalized to the point where we are now serving it in hospitals. If you want to avoid ending up on the operating table, make sure you and your doctor are paying attention to the following metrics: fasting blood sugar, blood pressure, cholesterol levels, and waist circumference. To support your metabolic health, make sure you eat plenty of fiber-rich fruits and vegetables and other whole foods. Avoid processed foods high in sugar and seed oils. By making small changes to your diet, you can improve your metabolic health and reduce your risk of developing chronic diseases like heart disease or diabetes.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Dr Ovadia’s website
Stay Off My Operating Table Podcast hosted by Dr Ovadia
Stay off My Operating Table: A Heart Surgeon’s Metabolic Health Guide to Lose Weight, Prevent Disease, and Feel Your Best Every Day by Dr Ovadia
Dr Ovadia on Twitter
Why We Get Fat: And What to Do About It by Gary Taubes

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Apr 25, 2022

00:58:16

In today’s episode, we cover trust and cooperation with Abbie Maroño. Abbie is the Director of Education at Social-Engineer, is a lecturer in Psychology, has a PhD in Behavior Analysis, was mentored by the body language expert Joe Navarro, and performs academic research specializing in nonverbal communication, trust, and cooperation.

Trust is important because our survival depends on our ability to cooperate with the people around us, so why do we place a strong emphasis on competition, what signals should we look for to determine someone’s trustworthiness, and how do we build trust in the first place?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is the definition of trust according to modern science?
How fast can trust be built and destroyed?
The big myth about competition and survival of the fittest – 10:10
What do we get wrong about competition vs cooperation in modern society, and why does this misconception lead to unhappiness and discontent in the workplace?
What nonverbal signals should you look for to determine if someone is trustworthy?
The trust problem with Zoom and Facetime – 24:52
What 3 common mistakes should you avoid when talking to someone through a video call if you want to build trust and comfort?
How does your lower body signal your approachability to the people around you, and how should you be standing if you want to be approachable?
How to rebuild trust – 37:48
What is the best way to apologize and rebuild trust after you break it?
What are the biggest myths surrounding eye contact and trust?

Trust is essential for both our personal and professional lives, but it can be difficult to build and easy to destroy. By understanding the signals we send when it comes to trustworthiness, we can take the necessary steps to build trust or rebuild trust after it’s been broken. And by fostering a cooperative environment, we can create happier relationships and more productive teams.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Apr 18, 2022

00:49:31

In today’s episode, we cover negotiation with Barry Nalebuff. Barry is a Professor at Yale where he has taught negotiation, innovation, strategy, and game theory for thirty years, and recently authored Split the Pie: A Radical New Way to Negotiate, which is based on his negotiation course.

Negotiating can be intimidating if you don’t do it on a regular basis, so what simple tips can you remember to make your next negotiation a win, how do you negotiate with people who are clearly more experienced than you, and what is the best question to ask when negotiating your salary?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What’s the difference between Split the Pie and Never Split the Difference?
How to negotiate with unfair people – 10:55
What can you do to negotiate with people who don’t care about fairness?
How can you “be ready to walk away” from a once-in-a-lifetime deal?
Dealing with people who don’t see the win-win outcome – 21:10
How do we use empathy to get the other person’s perspective and come up with a deal that satisfies both parties?
How much information should you disclose in a negotiation if you’re worried the information might be used against you?
How to build your negotiation skills – 35:30
What can you do to develop your negotiation skills?
How can you get the other party to see the pie you’re negotiating over?
What advice should you avoid when negotiating?
Negotiate the salary you deserve – 44:08
What questions can you ask so you know how to ask for the best compensation package without losing the offer?

It is important to remember that the goal of any negotiation should be a mutually beneficial agreement, aka the pie. Both parties need to feel like they’ve won something and achieved their goals in order for negotiations to be successful. If you can walk into a negotiation with empathy and an understanding of the other person’s perspective, you’re already on your way to building better skills. What have been your biggest challenges when negotiating? Let us know in the comments below. We would love to help!

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Split the Pie by Barry Nalebuff
Co-Opetition by Barry Nalebuff

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Apr 11, 2022

01:02:33

In today’s episode, we cover the brain with Lisa Barrett, PhD. Lisa is among the top one percent most cited scientists in the world for her revolutionary research in psychology and neuroscience, and is the author of the best-selling Seven and a Half Lessons About the Brain.

As we learn more about the brain we realize how mistaken we once were, so what have we been getting wrong about the brain, what have we learned, and how can you use that information to eliminate the unhelpful patterns and bad habits holding you back from living a fulfilling life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Where did the myth about the lizard brain come from and why is it such a popular belief?
Moving beyond the Lizard Brain – 10:47
What is the correct way to think about the conflict between rationality and what we mistakenly believe is the lizard brain so we can work toward becoming the people we want to be?
How is our brain functionality connected to our metabolism and how can you use that information to increase your brain’s performance and longevity?
Busting the Memory Myth – 26:10
How do our memories influence the way we operate in life and what can you do to overwrite old patterns that aren’t helping you anymore?
How does your metabolism
Do we have control over our actions? – 35:10
How does your body react to things before you are consciously aware of them and how can you use that to recognize unhelpful patterns?
What can you do to deconstruct unhelpful patterns and habits, and make it easier to build healthier habits?
Why does anxiety make things harder? – 43:30
What can you do to make it easier to do things that would normally cause you a lot of stress and anxiety?
How do our brains wire to connect and influence the brains of the people we interact with?

Science has shown us that our words and behavior have a measurable impact on the health of people around us. This means if we want to have a positive impact on those we care about, it’s crucial that we are thoughtful and intentional when interacting with others. Be mindful of the words you use, the eye contact you make, the body language you use, and how you treat people. Every person you influence will in turn influence you, so if you want to live in a positive, supporting environment, make sure you are treating others with love, respect, and encouragement.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Lisa Barrett’s website
Seven And A Half Lessons About The Brain by Lisa Barrett
How Emotions are Made: The Secret Life of the Brain by Lisa Barrett

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Apr 04, 2022

01:04:21

In today’s episode, we cover low value behavior with AJ and Johnny.

We all exhibit low value behavior that can push people away from us, so what are low value behaviors, what makes us exhibit low value behavior, and what can you do to stop these low value behaviors from destroying friendships and relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are low value behaviors, how do they push people away from us, and how can you notice them so you stop exhibiting them?
Why do low value behaviors make it difficult to create lasting friendships and relationships?
Why do we need attention, approval, and acceptance? – 14:20
What do we need from other humans to feel safe and why does every human need it?
How does your childhood shape the way you seek out value in the world and what can you do if your childhood influenced you to exhibit a lot of low value behaviors?
How to Identify Low Value Behaviors – 24:27
What is the difference between a high value person and a low value person?
What is supplicative behavior and what are some examples so you can make sure you don’t exhibit supplicative behavior?
When is being agreeable considered low value behavior?
Combative Behavior – 43:02
Why is it low value behavior to be argumentative and confrontational?
What are the verbal and nonverbal signals of combative behavior?
The Third Low Value Behavior – 50:05
When is it low value behavior to be competitive?
What is it about these low value behaviors that repel high value people from your life and what can you shift to high value behavior instead?

One of the worst blindspots people have in social situations is the way we go about satisfying our need for attention, approval, and acceptance. And we refer to attention, approval, and acceptance as value. We all have a need for value whether you like it or not. The difference between low value people and high value people is the way they go about getting that value. Low value people beg for it, fight you for it, and compete with you for it. High value people simply recognize their own value and seek to highlight the value in the people around them.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Running out of things to say in conversation… and still struggling to get people interested in you? That’s an uncomfortable position to be in. Don’t want to risk getting tongue-tied and screwing things up the next time you meet someone? Check out Conversation Magic now to make sure you don't crash and burn. With our bulletproof formula, you'll be flirting up a storm, sparking fun and engaging conversations, and making high-value friends anywhere!

Resources from this Episode

Mira Kirshenbaum | The Biggest Myth About Arguments

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Mar 28, 2022

01:13:28

In today’s episode, we cover passive communication with Dr Robert Glover. Robert is an internationally recognized authority on the Nice Guy Syndrome, has helped thousands of nice guys transform from being passive, resentful victims to empowered, integrated males, and is the author of No More Mr. Nice Guy: A Proven Plan For Getting What You Want in Love, Sex and Life.

Trying to be the nice guy is a fatal step many men take to get what they want out of life, but what makes being a nice guy so bad, how can you identify your nice guy tendencies, and what can you do to get what you want without being a jerk?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is Nice Guy Syndrome and why is being a nice guy (or nice girl) counterproductive to getting what you want out of life?
Does Nice Guy Syndrome also apply to women?
Being a Nice Guy makes people like you less – 13:30
Why does being a nice guy lead people to trust you less and like you less, and what should you do instead?
Why do Nice Guys seem inauthentic and untrustworthy?
The Covert Contracts of Nice Guys – 19:38
What are the three secret contracts Nice Guys have with other people and why are these contracts harmful to them and their relationships?
Identify Relationships that are not serving you – 32:34
What are Cooperative Reciprocal Relationships and what exercise can you do now to understand what relationships are not helping you and what relationships you should add to your life?
Setting Boundaries and Expressing Your Desires – 44:25
What can you do if you know you should set boundaries but aren’t sure how to set them or defend them when people around you push back?
If you feel shame related to your sexual desires, what can you do to work through it and develop a healthy relationship with your needs and wants, as well as expressing them confidently instead of hiding them?

Being a nice guy sounds like a good idea, doesn’t it? Why would it be a bad thing? Turns out, when a man is trying to be a nice guy, it almost always means he’s not being authentic. Many times, a nice guy is nice because he thinks that’s what other people want him to be. He thinks being nice will result in people liking him and treating him better and sleeping with him. Instead, people see the niceness as a facade masking his true intentions and feelings. This makes him untrustworthy and unlikable. People respect and are drawn to others who are comfortable being themselves and being honest with the people around them.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Dr. Robert Glover’s website
No More Mr. Nice Guy by Dr. Robert Glover

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Mar 21, 2022

01:20:55

In today’s episode, we cover the art of insubordination with Todd Kashdan. Todd is among the world’s top experts on the psychology of well-being, psychological strengths, mental agility, and social relationships.

Being a dissenter in today’s society is hard, but it is more important now than ever, so what can you do to raise questions about problems you see without being silenced, and how can you get your message across so people rally behind you instead of condemn you?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is the art of insubordination and why should you care?
Why is it important to have a public square where people can meet and exchange ideas?
The crucial importance of a clear consistent message – 12:07
If political polarization isn’t our biggest issue in society, what is and how do we overcome it?
How does technology speed up how quickly we self-segregate and isolate ourselves from different ideas and why is this dangerous to society?
Why does the use of labels get us into trouble and how do we overcome the stigma of labels?
Why We Must Understand the Art of Insubordination – 25:17
Why is the act of dissent important?
What can you do to persuade friends and family when you are a dissenter?
How can you introduce dissent into the mainstream without getting canceled?
How to be a Principled Rebel in Modern Society – 35:12
What does it mean to be a principled rebel and why does every society need principled rebels?
What is the best way to get your message across if you are part of a struggling minority influence?
Why do we need to expose ourselves to ideas that run counter to our own beliefs and worldview?

Dissenting is about more than just holding ideas and beliefs counter to mainstream thought. You must be willing to get involved in mainstream conversations, listen to what people have to say, and provide a legitimate path forward so people can see where your ideas lead. This allows them to be more comfortable following your ideas and handling any discomfort that might come from trying to change their worldview and the world around them.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog w,hen you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

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Mar 14, 2022

01:05:06

In today’s episode, we cover leadership and decision-making with David Siegel. David is the CEO of Meetup, the largest platform for finding and building local communities, and the author of Decide & Conquer: 44 Decisions that will Make or Break All Leaders.

Success is determined by the decisions you make and the people you surround yourself with, so how can you know when you’re making the right decision for your future, what can you do to surround yourself with people who will help you create success, and how do you maintain firm boundaries along the way?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does it take to be the CEO of a great company like Meetup and how can you apply that knowledge to your own goals?
Build a powerful network like a CEO – 19:28
What can you do to build a network that will get you to the next level of your career?
How do you create luck in your life so more and more opportunities present themselves to you?
What can you do to set firm boundaries as you become more successful?
Navigate difficult conversations with ease – 38:14
When is the right time to have a difficult conversation and what can you do to make difficult conversations easier?
How do you move your ego out of the way so it doesn’t sabotage your success as a leader?
Build a thriving company culture – 49:03
What can you do to foster a company culture that is open to change and willing to cooperate on effecting change?
What’s next for Meetup?

CEOs know the importance of having a powerful network and tough decision-making. It’s what gets them through difficult conversations and allows them to build a thriving company culture. But, it doesn’t happen overnight. You have to be intentional about who you connect with and how you engage with them if you want to reap the benefits. What are some things you can do this week to start building your own powerful CEO-style network and decision-making framework?

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Mar 07, 2022

00:56:45

In today’s episode, we cover setting boundaries with Nedra Tawwab. Nedra is a licensed therapist, sought-after relationship expert who has practiced relationship therapy for 14 years, and author of the instant New York Times bestseller “Set Boundaries, Find Peace”.

Boundaries are a challenging concept to implement for many, but it can be simplified once you understand them, so what are boundaries, what does it mean to communicate and defend your boundaries, and how do you handle situations where people are repeatedly crossing your boundaries?

What to Listen For

Introduction to Boundaries – 0:00
Why did Nedra Tawwab write a book on boundaries?
Why is boundary setting pushed out of us as children only to be demanded of us as adults, and what can you do to reclaim your ability to set boundaries so you can avoid unhealthy relationships?
What does it mean to set a boundary and how do you know when you should set a boundary?
Respecting Your Boundaries – 11:00
What should you say if you need to back out of a commitment?
Should you feel bad about backing out of a commitment?
What leads someone to ghost you and how should you handle it?
Building & Defending Your Boundaries – 24:50
What should you say if someone disrespects your boundary?
How do you set new boundaries with someone?
What can you do to show up for your team while setting healthy boundaries so you can get your work done?
Healthy vs Unhealthy Consequences for Boundaries – 34:40
How do you know when a relationship should end if the other person keeps crossing your boundaries?
How do you handle family members who are unwilling or unable to respect your boundaries?

Boundaries are important because they allow us to build healthy relationships with people who respect us as individuals. If you don’t communicate to someone what it means to respect you and treat you well, you’re gambling on their ability to read your mind. I don’t know any mind readers so I’d call that a bad gamble.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Nedra Tawwab on Instagram
Nedra Tawwab’s website
Set Boundaries, Find Peace by Nedra Tawwab
Set Boundaries Workbook

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Mar 01, 2022

01:09:34

In today’s episode, we cover procrastination and perfectionism with Jennifer Kemp. Jennifer is a leading expert on perfectionism and builds flexibility and self-compassion when working with therapeutic clients.

Many of us experience perfectionism in different ways but they all hold us back from where we want to be, so what are the different ways perfectionism shows up in your life, what are the warning signs your perfectionism is unhealthy, and what can you do to overcome your perfectionism?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is unhelpful perfectionism and how is it different from the perfectionism we understand today?
What 4 signs can you look for to identify whether your perfectionism is healthy or not?

The importance of adapting vs perfecting – 13:40
How does the pursuit of perfection lead to less progression when you’re trying to learn or improve a skill?
What classes can you take to improve your conversational ability, sense of humor, and perfectionism?

What makes Art of Charm training programs so effective – 25:39
How do AoC alumni maintain their development after the program so they don’t fall back into their old behavior?
How does skill development become self-reinforcing so it feels fun rather than a lot of work?

The warning signs of perfectionism – 39:20
How is perfectionism linked to other mental health issues and how can you identify them?
What exercises can you do if you’re struggling with a harsh inner critic?

Is perfectionism keeping you from the success you’re after? You’re not alone. Perfectionism can show up in your life in several ways, including procrastination. Perfectionism can be a strength when it helps you create quality results, but it’s not doing you any favors if it stops you from taking action.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Jennifer Kemp’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The ACT Workbook for Perfectionism

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Feb 28, 2022

01:06:19

In today’s episode, we cover procrastination and perfectionism with Jennifer Kemp. Jennifer is a leading expert on perfectionism and builds flexibility and self-compassion when working with therapeutic clients.

Many of us experience perfectionism in different ways but they all hold us back from where we want to be, so what are the different ways perfectionism shows up in your life, what are the warning signs your perfectionism is unhealthy, and what can you do to overcome your perfectionism?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What is unhelpful perfectionism and how is it different from the perfectionism we understand today?
What 4 signs can you look for to identify whether your perfectionism is healthy or not?

The importance of adapting vs perfecting – 13:40
How does the pursuit of perfection lead to less progression when you’re trying to learn or improve a skill?

What classes can you take to improve your conversational ability, sense of humor, and perfectionism?

What makes Art of Charm training programs so effective – 25:39
How do AoC alumni maintain their development after the program so they don’t fall back into their old behavior?

How does skill development become self-reinforcing so it feels fun rather than a lot of work?

The warning signs of perfectionism – 39:20
How is perfectionism linked to other mental health issues and how can you identify them?

What exercises can you do if you’re struggling with a harsh inner critic?

Is perfectionism keeping you from the success you’re after? You’re not alone. Perfectionism can show up in your life in several ways, including procrastination. Perfectionism can be a strength when it helps you create quality results, but it’s not doing you any favors if it stops you from taking action.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Jennifer Kemp’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Feb 21, 2022

01:10:32

In today’s episode, we cover being an awesome human with Nataly Kogan. Nataly is a former writer for Verywell Mind, the co-founder and CEO of Happier, a leading wellness company on a mission to make millions of people happier, and the author of The Awesome Human Project.

Burnout can be a deadly trap you don’t recognize until the damage is done, so what can you do to avoid it (and still be successful), how does perfectionism make it worse, and how do you find your “why” so you can push through tough times and criticism?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are some obvious signs of burnout?
What is the biggest lie entrepreneurs and leaders tell themselves to keep pushing through burn out?

Be an Awesome Human – 12:47
How do you edit your thoughts to help you be the best version of yourself?
What two questions can you ask yourself to edit your thoughts and stop your mind from sabotaging your work, relationships, and goals?
What does it mean to treat yourself with compassion and why do we ALL need to treat ourselves with more compassion?

Perfectionism is the Enemy of Completion – 31:00
How can you reframe perfectionism so it doesn’t stop you from finishing what you start and putting your work out there for others to enjoy?
Why is it detrimental to your success to value every piece of criticism you receive?

Find your “why” and flourish in any job – 41:31
Why is it important to know your “why” when it comes to long term success and fulfillment in any line of work?
What is emotional fitness, why is it just as important as physical fitness, and how do you develop it?

It’s easy to undervalue our physical and mental needs when pursuing ambitious goals. You can get lost in devoting countless hours to building a company and push aside physical exercise because it takes time away from the company. You can get lost in spending all of your free time at the gym and push aside quality sleep because “sleep is for the weak.” But we tend to forget the only reason we can do any of these things is because we have one precious life to work with.

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Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalog when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Nataly Kogan’s website

The Awesome Human Project by Nataly Kogan

Awesome Human Hour hosted by Nataly Kogan

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Arthur C. Brooks’s website

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Feb 14, 2022

01:01:32

In today’s episode, we cover happiness with Arthur C. Brooks. Arthur is a professor at the Harvard Kennedy School and Harvard Business School, and is the author of 12 books, including the national bestsellers “Love Your Enemies” and “The Conservative Heart”, and his newest title “From Strength to Strength”.

Happiness and meaning are two things we all want but many of us follow the wrong paths to find them, so how do you figure out what the correct path is and how do you find meaning in a world that is focused on satisfying superficial desires?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What is the ultimate secret to happiness according to science?
What are the 4 disciplines exhibited by happy people on a daily basis that you can start implementing today?
How can you get the benefits of religious faith & community if organized religion isn’t your thing?

Achievement does not equal Fulfillment – 14:19
Why do some of the most successful people on the planet feel empty and alone?

Why do many of us reach a point in our careers when we feel we’ve peaked and what can you do to keep excelling in your profession beyond that point?
What is success addiction, how do we fall into it, and what can you do to kick the addiction if you find yourself addicted to success?

Strive for fulfillment instead of achievement – 29:10
What should we be pursuing if our current goals of money, power, fame, and pleasure are leading us to feel unhappy, alone, and empty?

Why is school/education not the answer if you’re looking for more meaning in life, and what are we looking for when we think school is the answer?

How are music and other creative pursuits related to our ability to find fulfillment and happiness?

Everyday the world tries to convince us the path to happiness and fulfillment is traversed by spending money on a product or service. We are made to think being famous will lead to fulfillment and love. We mistakenly believe having more power and control over the world around us will lead to feeling complete and accomplished. The funny thing about happiness and fulfillment is they are found in the simple things that do not require significant sums of money: loving the people around you, wanting and needing less, having strong spiritual beliefs, and doing work that is a service to others.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

From Strength to Strength: Finding Success, Happiness and Deep Purpose in the Second Half of Life by Arthur C. Brooks

Dr. Judson Brewer | Unwinding Anxiety

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Dr Taylor Burrowes’s website

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Feb 07, 2022

01:04:33

In today’s episode, we cover neuroticism with Dr. Taylor Burrowes. Taylor received her PhD in Marriage and Family Counseling, is a retired mental health counselor and marriage & family therapist, and now works independently.

Like mental health in general, we all fall somewhere on a spectrum of neuroticism, so how can you notice when you’re exhibiting neurotic behavior and what can you do to make sure it doesn’t ruin your relationships?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What is neuroticism and how does it show up in all of us?
Who is Dr Taylor Burrowes?

The signs of neuroticism – 15:18
How are restlessness and neuroticism connected and how can you identify when restlessness is leading you to make poor decisions?

Why are pauses important in conversation when you’re speaking to one person or an audience?
What can you do to stop overthinking from ruining your relationships while still allowing it to help you in areas like work?

How does neuroticism influence your social development – 33:36
Why is overthinking detrimental to your ability to be seen as authentic and build relationships?

Why is coaching so important when it comes to developing your social skills?
Why do we jump to conclusions that often have no evidence supporting them and how can we stop doing it?

What causes you to experience neurotic behavior – 52:20
What are the root causes of the neurotic behavior we all experience at times and what can you do about it?

We’re all a little bit crazy, and that’s ok. Neuroticism shows up in all of us in several ways including restlessness, overthinking, and jumping to conclusions. It can get in the way of healthy relationships, especially for men, because neuroticism conveys a lack of confidence in who you are. Once you can recognize neurotic behaviors, you can remind yourself it’s important to not act on them.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Dr Taylor Burrowes on Twitter

10 ways neuroticism shows up in men and what to do about it | YouTube

The Vetting System by Dr. Taylor Burrowes

The 4 Stress Languages | YouTube

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us

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Jan 31, 2022

01:05:16

In today’s episode, we cover regret with Daniel Pink. Daniel is the author of several New York Times bestsellers, including Drive and To Sell is Human, and his newest book, The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward.

To have freedom of choice means we will experience regret, so what can you do to have a healthy relationship with your regrets, and how can you look at regret moving forward so you make the decisions that will lead to the least amount of regret?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What is the best way to motivate a team working on a long term project?
What is the single biggest motivator in someone’s day-to-day work and how can you use that to increase your productivity and your team’s productivity?
What question can you ask to get unstuck when you’re not sure how to proceed in work and life?

Is it possible to live life without any regrets – 13:19
Why is it actually unhealthy to try to live without regrets and what benefit do regrets serve us?

What is the difference between regret and rumination and why can one be good for you but not the other?
What are the four categories of regrets?
How do you know when you should reach out to someone you’ve lost touch with?

How to use regret in a meaningful way – 38:00
What strategies can you use to develop a healthy relationship with your regrets so they don’t stop you from enjoying life and becoming successful?

Why is self-compassion important for neutralizing the harmful effects of regrets?

Regrets can suck, but there are a variety of ways to reframe regret and develop a healthy relationship with it so it guides you rather than torments you. When we feel regret over a decision we made, it’s important to spend time understanding why you feel that regret. Then think about the next time that decision might have to be made and commit to making it. Write it down. Tell your friends so they can hold you accountable if possible.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Daniel Pink’s website

The Power of Regret: How Looking Backward Moves Us Forward

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Is Efficiency Overrated?: Minimal Social Interactions Lead to Belonging and Positive Affect

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Jan 24, 2022

01:02:41

In today’s episode, we cover breaking the ice with AJ, Johnny, and Michael Herold.

Why is breaking the ice an important skill, what impact does it have on your health, and what strategies can you use to make breaking the ice easy and effective?

What to Listen For

Breaking the ice and your health – 0:00

Why should we be engaging in more small talk and why is it dangerous to our mental and physical health to spend too much time alone?
What is the first obvious signal that loneliness is your new normal and what can you do to break out of that cycle?

Make small talk more effective – 20:18
Why are witty one-liners ineffective at breaking the ice and what should you say instead?

What questions should you avoid when meeting someone for the first time, and what questions should you ask instead?
What is the easiest way to revive a conversation if you feel like it’s dying or getting awkward?

Break the ice MORE OFTEN! – 30:58
How should we be looking at breaking the ice and small talk if we want more opportunities, more friends, and a more fulfilling life?

How do you break the ice with someone wearing headphones?
Why is making small talk important if you have goals and dreams you want to accomplish in life?

It’s easy for us introverts to dismiss small talk and interactions with strangers as a waste of time. What’s the point, right? The problem with this mentality is that it ignores our human nature. We are social creatures, and as social creatures our mental and physical health will suffer if we are isolated from our tribe. That is one reason being exiled from the tribe used to be the ultimate punishment as life without the support of your fellow tribesmen surely meant death in the wild.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Art of Charm Ice Breaker Cheat Sheet

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Breath: The New Science of a Lost Art by James Nestor

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Jan 17, 2022

01:05:57

In today’s episode, we cover breathing with James Nestor. James has written for Scientific American, BBC, The New York Times, The Atlantic, National Public Radio and more, and is the author of the best-selling book, Breath: The New Science of a Lost Art.

Breathing incorrectly can have detrimental effects on your sleep, metabolism, inflammation, and even your lifespan, but what is the correct way to breathe, why is evolution working against us so we breathe worse over time, and what exercise can you use to train your body to subconsciously breathe correctly?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

How did James Nestor become so focused on breathing?
How is evolution working against our breathing?
What do people often get wrong about survival of the fittest and evolution?

The Lost Art of Breathing – 11:10
Why is breathing not talked about by the medical community when it’s so crucial to our health and wellbeing?

How does breathing impact your sleep and what can you do to improve your sleep with your breathing?
How does breathing impact your metabolism and how can you use your breathing to help you burn more calories?
How are lung capacity and lifespan connected and how can you increase your lifespan?

Breathe CORRECTLY to eliminate inflammation – 34:00
How is your breathing on a daily basis making your chronic inflammation worse and how should you be breathing instead?

Why do you need to stop breathing with your mouth?

Why do we feel better as humans when we breathe through our noses and not our mouths?
How long should you inhale, hold your breath, and exhale to train your body to breathe correctly?
How can correct breathing make you a better public speaker?

Many people go through their entire lives without thinking about the way they breathe. It’s one of those things that our bodies do automatically so it’s easy to shrug off, but breathing is arguably one of the most important activities we do on a daily basis, so time should be spent trying to understand the best way to breathe.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

James Nestor’s website

Why We Sleep: Unlocking the Power of Sleep and Dreams by Matthew Walker

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Unwinding Anxiety: New Science Shows How to Break the Cycles of Worry and Fear to Heal Your Mind by Dr. Judson Brewer

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Jan 10, 2022

01:07:10

In today’s episode, we cover anxiety with Dr. Judson Brewer. Jud is the Director of Research and Innovation at the Mindfulness Center and associate professor in Behavioral and Social Sciences at the School of Public Health and Psychiatry at the School of Medicine at Brown University, as well as head of behavioral health at Sharecare.

Anxiety can make anyone’s life more difficult, but you can take steps to minimize or eliminate it altogether—so how are your habits and thought processes making your anxiety worse, and what can you do to take back control of your life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What common misconceptions do people have about anxiety?
How do habits and anxiety play off each other and what can we do to prevent our habits from creating crippling anxiety?

Taking back control from our environment and biology – 12:51
What can you do to overcome the influence our environments and biology have on amping up our anxiety?

What simple exercise can you do to stop bad habits and when should you do it?
What question can you ask yourself if you want to stop binging or over indulging?

Is anxiety stopping you from pursuing positive activities? – 34:56
What can you do if your anxiety is getting in the way of doing things that are good for you?

How can bringing awareness to your anxiety help you to get your life back from anxiety dictating your actions?

The danger and harm caused by worrying – 49:20
What is going on when you worry and how does it impact your behaviors?

What can you do if you’re constantly worrying?

In ancient times, anxiety was useful for teaching us what we should be concerned about. But in the modern world, we are bombarded with a million things everyday that we “should” worry about. Between notifications on our smartphones, the news, that overflowing email inbox, and everything we see on social media, the anxiety can be overwhelming. As a result, we tend to develop habits as a way of coping with the anxiety, and those habits can lead to even worse anxiety.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Dr. Brewer’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Dr. Yael Schonbrun’s website

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Jan 03, 2022

01:12:03

In today’s episode, we cover healthy relationships and finding the right partner with Dr Yael. Dr Yael is a licensed clinical psychologist, assistant professor at Brown University, and writer about parenting, work, and relationships.

A healthy relationship takes work, but how do you know what relationships are worth the work, is moving in together a good test for the relationship, and how do you reignite passion in a relationship?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

Why did Dr Yael Schonbrun take the Art of Charm Unstoppable program?
What is the trap many of us fall into in the modern dating world and why are we making it harder to find healthy relationships?

Value based dating and moving in together – 13:00
What questions can you ask to figure out what you want to get out of dating?

What mindset do you need to avoid if you’re thinking about moving in with someone you’re dating?
What signs should you look out for when thinking about moving in with someone?

Looking beyond lust for red flags – 30:40
How should you think about lust when you’re actively dating?

Reigniting passion in a relationship – 44:40
What is the foundation for passion in romantic relationships and what can you do to reintroduce it?

What is the evolutionary need for novelty in romantic relationships?
How do you know when a relationship is worth ending?

Your relationships require the same work we put into everything else in life. If we go about life acting as if those relationships will always be there, we are bound to lose them. Why should they invest time in us if we’re not willing to invest in them? The first step in developing healthy relationships is making that commitment to invest and following through.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Unstoppable Coaching Program

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Victoria Medvec | Master Negotiation By Avoiding These 3 Traps

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Dec 27, 2021

01:02:17

In today’s episode, we cover what we learned in 2021.

2021 was a wild ride for everyone, so let’s take a moment to reflect on what we’ve learned, overcome, and how far we’ve come.

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What was the most powerful takeaway for negotiating we heard from our guests?
What simple and effective strategy can you use to make healthy habits much easier to adopt?

Asking for help doesn’t need to be hard – 20:00
What simple mental switch can you flip to make asking for help a positive experience for both people?

What proven strategies can you use to better manage your anxiety on a daily basis?
Why is the pursuit of balance the wrong goal to chase if you want to be successful?

How do AJ and Johnny decide how to interview each guest – 37:01
What can you do to prepare a solid interview experience for anyone you have on a podcast?

What have AJ, Johnny, and coach Michael done and learned over the last year and what can you take away from their lessons?

The podcast has had some amazing guests over the last year. Let’s take a minute to highlight all the game changing tips, tricks, and strategies we’ve learned in 2021.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Katy Milkman | Eliminate Unhealthy Habits Today with 3 Scientifically Proven Strategies

Dr. Caroline Leaf | The Secret to Cleaning Up Your Mental Mess & 5 Steps to Healing Grief

Joe Navarro | Become an Exceptional Communicator by Mastering These 5 Traits

Tim Grover | Achieve Superhuman Focus by Annihilating Distractions

Erica Dhawan | Communicate Powerfully by Mastering Digital Body Language

Carey Nieuwhof | Incredible Productivity and Never Burn Out

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Top 10 Gifts You Should NEVER Give

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Dec 20, 2021

01:02:15

In today’s episode, we cover the art of gift giving with John Ruhlin. John Ruhlin is the founder and CEO of Ruhlin Group, the master of building businesses by giving gifts, and the author of Giftology: The Art and Science of Using Gifts to Cut Through the Noise, Increase Referrals, and Strengthen Retention.

Giving the right gift can radically strengthen any personal or business relationship, but what questions should you ask when thinking about the right gift for someone, what gifts should you avoid at all cost, and when is the right time to give a gift?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

Who do people often overlook when it comes to building and maintaining relationships?
What can you do to make gift giving feel less like a transaction and more like a natural part of relationship building?
How can you make gift giving a game changer for all of your personal and professional relationships?

The secret to giving gifts that change your life – 13:17

How much money should you set aside for giving gifts every year and why do you need to plan for it?

What is the ultimate recipe for gift giving and what should you think about when giving gifts?

Examples of business changing gifts – 26:23

What crucial questions should you think about when personalizing a gift for someone?

How should you start giving gifts if it’s not something you’re used to doing?
What types of gifts should you never send?

Tips for personal gift giving – 45:36
What gifts can you give to deepen your personal relationships?

The right gift can change someone’s life and create a memory that will last forever. But how can you figure out what that gift might be? For one, it must be meaningful to the receiver, and what things in a person’s life are likely to be the most meaningful? In many cases, it’s our values and our families, so think about how you might personalize an item that person uses or sees everyday and incorporate something related to their values or family. An example? How about a knife set in which each knife is engraved with a different favorite quote of theirs.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

John Ruhlin’s website

Giftology website

Giftology: The Art and Science of Using Gifts to Cut Through the Noise, Increase Referrals, and Strengthen Retention by Josh Ruhlin

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Great Good Place: Cafes, Coffee Shops, Bookstores, Bars, Hair Salons, and Other Hangouts at the Heart of a Community by Ray Oldenburg

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Dec 13, 2021

01:03:24

In today’s episode, we cover moving to a new city with AJ, Johnny, and Michael.

Moving to a new city can often feel like a scary or intimidating life event, but it doesn’t have to—so why does moving feel like a bad thing, what can you do to look at moving as an exciting opportunity, and what can you do to make sure you live a fulfilling life no matter where you go?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What should you NOT do if you want to create a new life when moving to a new city?
What can you do to meet new people in a city before you move there?

Third Place: what is it and why do we need it? – 11:41
What is the “third place” and why is it important for the health and strength of every community and its residents?

What is the most important factor in a communal meeting place within your community?

How to find (or create) your third place – 21:56
What easy exercise can you do today to find a great place to meet new people who share your interests and are open to meeting new people?

Where can you look to experience your city from a different perspective that makes it easy to meet new people?

Meeting people made easy – 36:40
Why is it important to have missions in life and what missions can you give yourself with to make it easy to build a social circle anywhere in the world?

Moving to a new city can be scary when you don’t know anyone there, but it doesn’t have to be. There are several things you can do to make the process of building a social circle or professional network from scratch easy. Start by making a list of hobbies or interests you enjoy and look for opportunities to engage in those activities in the city you’re moving to.

Be sure to grab a copy of our Move To A New City Checklist: https://theartofcharm.com/newcity

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Dec 06, 2021

00:58:01

In today’s episode, we cover self-compassion with Dr Kristin Neff. Kristin received her doctorate from the University of California at Berkeley, is a pioneer in the field of self-compassion research, and is releasing her new book Fierce Self-Compassion: How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power and Thrive.

Self-compassion is the key to stop your inner critic in its tracks, but what is self-compassion, why is it important to be happy, and what can you do to develop a strong sense of self-compassion?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What are the three elements of self-compassion and how can you use self-compassion to improve your daily life?
What are the warning signs you need self-compassion and what ways can you apply self-compassion?
Why is it easier to show compassion toward others and not ourselves?

Exercises to Strengthen Self-Compassion – 18:22
What simple exercises can you use right now to show yourself more compassion and stop being so hard on yourself?

What can you do to work on mindfulness?

Setting and Maintaining Boundaries – 27:10
Why are boundaries important in developing your self-compassion?

How can you set boundaries and learn how to say no while showing compassion and self-compassion?

Perfectionism and Self-Compassion – 39:00
What can you do to manage your perfectionism with self-compassion so you can stop beating yourself up over mistakes and failures?

If you struggle with accepting your mistakes and failures, self-compassion is your key to developing a healthy relationship with your imperfect self. We all make mistakes, but for some reason we are much better at showing compassion to the people we care about than ourselves. Cultivating a practice of self-compassion can change that and allow you to be kind to yourself while still pushing yourself to keep improving.

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Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

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Resources from this Episode

compassion.org/">Dr Kristin Neff’s website

compassion.org/fierce-self-compassion/">Fierce Self-Compassion by Dr Kristin Neff

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The Sweet Spot: The Pleasures of Suffering and the Search for Meaning

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Nov 29, 2021

01:02:49

In today’s episode, we cover the pursuit of meaning with Paul Bloom. Paul is Professor of Psychology at the University of Toronto, Professor Emeritus of Psychology at Yale University, is the author of six books including his newest book, The Sweet Spot: The Pleasures of Suffering and the Search for Meaning.

The pursuit of meaning is often overshadowed by the pursuit of happiness, but which one is more important to living a fulfilling life, how are suffering, meaning, and happiness related, and what steps can you take to pursue meaning in your life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

How does science define suffering and why is some good while some is bad?
Why do we seek out sorrow, suffering, and pain in experiences like spicy food, roller coasters, scary movies, etc?

Pursuit of Happiness vs Pursuit of Meaning – 11:40
How does pain lead to an increased sense of meaning in life?
How does money influence our suffering and happiness?
Why are people in rich countries generally happy while people in poor countries have more meaning in life?
What can you do to help your children understand the difference between happiness and meaning in life?

A fulfilling existence is not just about positive feelings – 31:56
Why is it important to embrace painful experiences on a regular basis?

How can you find meaning in life without thinking about it or intentionally seeking it out?
Is there a link between chasing prestige, status, and meaning?
What is the difference between pursuing pleasure and pursuing meaning?
How can anxiety prevent you from finding meaning in life and what can you do to overcome it?

It is unfortunate that we put so much effort into avoiding pain, discomfort, and suffering. It is understandable from a short term perspective because it is natural for anything that feels pain to avoid things that cause pain. But it is the pain, discomfort, and suffering in our lives that leads to us learning and becoming stronger, wiser, more competent humans. This is not to say you should go outside and break your arm, but that pain is inevitable, and if we can learn to embrace it and work through it, those efforts will pay off much more in the long run than simply trying to be comfortable and safe as much as possible.

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Resources from this Episode

Paul Bloom’s website

Paul Bloom on Twitter

Master Your Mindset with David Goggings | AoC Podcast

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Nov 22, 2021

00:52:12

In today’s episode, we cover how to change with Katy Milkman. Katy is a professor at The Wharton School of the University of Pennsylvania, host of Charles Schwab’s popular behavioral economics podcast Choiceology, and the former president of the international Society for Judgment and Decision Making.

Making long lasting changes in our behavior can be difficult, so what mindsets help us to make changes, what can you do to overcome low confidence when making big changes, and how do you overcome procrastination so you don’t keep putting off the life you want?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What mindsets are best suited to achieving long lasting results when attempting to change something about yourself?

Overcoming low confidence when making big changes – 14:00
What can you do if you don’t feel confident in your ability to improve yourself or make a big change in your life?
What can you do to create accountability in you and your friends’ lives?
What simple and powerful tip can you implement to make hard habits easier to form?

Strategies for overcoming procrastination – 25:00
What strategies can you implement to overcome procrastination?

How can you set up your life so it makes it easier for you to make better decisions for yourself?

It’s not easy to make long-lasting improvements in our lives. Fortunately, there is plenty of science to show us different ways to make those improvements easier, whether it’s relying on friends for accountability, associating the behavior change with a positive activity you enjoy, or even different ways of punishing yourself for not following through with your commitments.

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Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Katy Milkman’s website

How to Change: The Science of Getting from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be by Katy Milkman

Stickk website

Beeminder website

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Nov 15, 2021

01:10:12

In today’s episode, we cover social media’s impact on mental health with Dr Brian Primack. Brian is the dean of the College of Education and Health Professions at the University of Arkansas, the professor of public health and medicine, and is the author of You Are What You Click: How Being Selective, Positive, and Creative Can Transform Your Social Media Experience.

Science is showing us that social media use in any dose can have detrimental effects on our mental health, so what can we do to ensure we have a positive experience on social media and protect ourselves and those we care about its effects?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00

What amount of social media use won’t increase the risk for mental health issues?

Social Media vs Traditional Media – 11:37
What does “You are what you click” mean?
How are social media algorithms working against your mental health and what can you do about it?
What are the two things we can control while using social media that limit the harm it does to us?

Do different platforms have different impacts? – 21:47
Does the number of social media platforms you use impact your risk for mental health issues?

What can you do to have a positive experience on social media so you’re not negatively impacting your mental health every time you log in?
How much impact does social media use have on your quality of sleep and what can you do about it?

The damage of constantly comparing yourself to others – 31:00
Why is it bad for you to constantly be looking at the highlight reels of other people's lives and what strategies can you use to overcome the harm?

What effect do parasocial relationships have on your mental health?

Social media, misinformation, and disinformation – 42:17
How do the algorithms used by social media lead to drastically different perceptions of who you know and the world around you?

What can we do to guard our own mental health as well as the people we care about who aren’t aware of the dangers of social media use?

The simplest way to prevent the harm done to us by social media use is to stop using social media altogether. But that’s easier said than done for many people, so what can you do if eliminating social media from your life isn’t feasible?

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Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

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Resources from this Episode

You Are What You Click by Brian Primack

Brian Primack’s website

books.typeform.com/to/Ljgb2nm8">You Are What You Click Personality Quiz

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You Can Change Other People by Peter Bregman

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Nov 08, 2021

01:03:00

In today’s episode, we cover changing ourselves and others with Peter Bregman. Peter blends his deep expertise in business, leadership, and people to deliver quantifiable results in business, professional, and personal development, and is the bestselling author and contributor of over 18 books, including his newest book, You CAN Change Other People: The Four Steps to Help Your Colleagues, Employees—Even Family—Up Their Game.

Changing other people is not easy, but there are steps we can take to make positive changes in other peoples’ lives and do so in a high value cooperative way, so why do people resist change so much, what are the four things anyone needs before they will change, and how do approach people about making a change without coming across as the critic or the bad guy?

What to Listen For

Why do we struggle so much trying to change people – 1:53

Why do we readily accept changes we make for ourselves but strongly resist changes that other people try to make for us?
What is the most important skill you can develop as a leader in your organization?
What are the misconceptions we have about changing ourselves and people around us?

The 4 things people need before they’ll change – 8:30
What gets in the way of people making changes in their lives and how can we help them make the changes they want?
What emotion do we experience that makes it so much harder for us to change?

Strategies to manage emotions in high pressure situations – 30:31
How do you approach helping people improve themselves so you are viewed as a friend or ally rather than the enemy?

Indicators of a thorough plan for implementing change – 46:13
What can you do to implement change in your organization if you are not yet in an official leadership position?

Changing other people is not easy, and that’s a good thing. If it were easy to change other people, that would make it easy for other people to change you. As individuals, we cherish our autonomy. We value our ability to be ourselves and resist the changes other people want us to make. With that said, none of us is perfect and we all have areas in our lives that could be improved and make our lives better. But in order for us to be open to allowing other people to help change us, there are four things we need. Once we have all four, we can come up with a plan and be held accountable by someone other than ourselves.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Bregman Partners website

Peter Bregman on LinkedIn

Peter Bregman on Twitter

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The 7 Signs of Toxic People (Cheat Sheet)

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Nov 01, 2021

01:10:02

In today’s episode, we cover toxic relationships with AJ, Johnny, and Michael.

Toxic relationships can suck the joy and satisfaction out of our lives, so what can you do to recognize the toxic relationships in your life, what can you do to remove them, and what traits should you look for when bringing new people into your life?

What to Listen For

What makes a toxic person toxic – 0:00

What one question can you ask yourself to determine if someone in your life is toxic?
What situations draw out toxic people in our lives and how can we recognize them when they show themselves?

Identifying toxic people in your life – 11:49
What simple methods can you use to identify toxic relationships in your life?
How can your own self-awareness help you recognize why you are surrounding yourself with certain people?
What can you do to support friends and family who have different values than you?

The 7 signs of toxic people – 22:44
What are the 3 ways toxic people will try to control you and stop you from pursuing your goals?

What are 4 ways your generosity can be taken advantage of by toxic individuals?

The 3 high value traits of non-toxic people – 51:03
What traits should you look for in potential friends and professional connections?

Removing toxic people from your life – 54:54
What are 5 ways to remove toxic people from your life?

Loneliness and toxic relationships have been on the rise over the last couple of decades. But what does it mean for a relationship to be toxic? The easiest way is to ask yourself, “Is this person taking away happiness or purpose from my life?” Now, no one is perfect so there might be moments when you feel that way about a person, but if you feel that way consistently about someone, it’s time to see if their behavior is on our list of 7 traits of toxic people and then determine how you want to handle it.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Michael Herold’s TEDx Talk

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Dr Wendy Suzuki’s website

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Oct 25, 2021

00:54:10

In today’s episode, we cover anxiety with Dr Wendy Suzuki. Dr Suzuki is a professor of neural science and psychology at the New York University’s Center for Neural Science, and the author of “Healthy Brain, Happy Life: A Personal Program to to Activate Your Brain and Do Everything Better” and her newest book, “Good Anxiety: Harnessing the Power of the Most Misunderstood Emotion.”

Anxiety is typically something we try to avoid, but why do we avoid it, what does science tell us about anxiety, and how can we use anxiety to our advantage?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 2:35

What is good anxiety and how do you recognize when anxiety is good or bad for you?
How do you recognize when the anxiety you’re experiencing is bad enough that you should seek help?
What behaviors might you be exhibiting that make your anxiety worse?

Relationships and their impact on our anxiety – 11:32
How do your relationships impact your anxiety and what can you do to mitigate that impact?
What simple exercise can you do anywhere to get a handle on your everyday anxiety?
How can you use small rituals and habits to stop your anxiety from ruining your daily activities and responsibilities?

Conquering anxiety – 27:12
What can you do if your anxiety is stopping you from falling asleep at night?

What simple mental exercises can you use to diffuse your anxiety so it doesn’t have such a strong influence on your life?
How can you prepare for social events so your anxiety doesn’t ruin the event for you?

Managing anxiety in loved ones – 39:30
What can you do as parents if you are concerned about anxiety in your children?

What do many of us do to make our anxiety worse when we believe it’s actually making our anxiety better?

We tend to place anxiety into a category of emotions we try to avoid. While you can experience anxiety that is so bad it warrants professional help, the anxiety most of us deal with on a daily basis can be embraced for what it can teach us about ourselves and the people around us. If you want to better manage your anxiety, start by looking at it from a place of curiosity and creativity. Next time you’re experiencing anxiety, take a moment to ask yourself where the anxiety is coming from. The more you can look at your anxiety objectively, the faster it will subside and be manageable.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Do you LOVE the toolbox episodes? Did you know that every week we give a LIVE mini-toolbox lesson inside our Private Facebook Group? Best of all it is FREE to join. Join today and get access to all of our live training and level up your communication, leadership, influence and persuasion skills. With 14,000 members it’s a great place to network, learn and overcome any obstacle that’s in your way.

Did you know that you can get the whole Art of Charm catalogue when you subscribe to Stitcher Premium using our link? That’s 15 years of podcasts featuring expert guests and toolbox episodes! Sign up today and use Code “CHARM” to get a free month!

Resources from this Episode

Good Anxiety: Harnessing the Power of the Most Misunderstood Emotion

Healthy Brain, Happy Life: A Personal Program to to Activate Your Brain and Do Everything Better

Dr Wendy Suzuki on Twitter

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

You Have More Influence Than You Think by Vanessa Bohns

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Oct 18, 2021

00:58:40

In today’s episode, we cover influence with Professor Vanessa Bohns. Vanessa is a social psychologist, an award-winning researcher and teacher, and a professor of organizational behavior at Cornell University.

We all have the ability to influence those around us to some degree, so what can you do to understand your influence, grow your influence, and use your influence to help you achieve your goals?

What to Listen For

Intro and Vanessa’s origin story – 0:00

What do many of us get wrong about our influence over others, the perception others have of us, and how much other people actually like us?
Why do we always feel like everyone is watching when we feel embarrassed?
What is the spotlight effect?

How to start recognizing your influence – 13:34
What can you do to overcome the limiting beliefs you might have about how much influence you actually have?
What can you do as an introvert to feel confident and comfortable in situations where you know it’s going to be uncomfortable?

Being more genuine during the chaos of cancel culture – 24:30
What can we do to be more comfortable being genuine when people are scared to say the wrong thing?

What can we do to counter those who want to use their power and influence against us if we are trying to be more open and trusting of others?

What can you do to overcome your fear of rejection?

Learning to say no – 36:16
How do you learn to say no to someone who is in a position of power or authority over you?

Our common misconceptions about influence – 44:25
Why and how do we underestimate the compounding effect of our individual influence outside of the people we interact with directly?

How do we view our influence compared to how our influence actually works on people around us?

We often underestimate the impact we have on the people around us because of our misconceptions about how influence works. We get caught up in thinking influence is our ability to directly influence a person’s actions with our words, but in reality we influence the people around us in small amounts over extended periods of time.

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Resources from this Episode

Vannesa Bohns’s website

Vanessa Bohns on Twitter

The invisibility cloak illusion: People (incorrectly) believe they observe others more than others observe them

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Compassionate Mind Collaborative website

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Oct 11, 2021

00:47:59

In today’s episode, we cover anger management with Dr. Isabelle Leboeuf and Chris Fraser. Dr. Leboeuf integrates hypnotherapy, cognitive behavioural therapy, and compassion-focused therapy in her private practice in the North of France. Chris has been helping children, individuals, and families to be the best versions of themselves for over 25 years, and co-authored the book Freedom: How Teens Can Use Mindful Compassion to Thrive in a Chaotic World and Grow a Purpose-driven Life.

Anger is an emotion we all experience throughout life, but how we respond to it makes all the difference in the world, so what even is anger, how should we look at it, and what are some healthy strategies for dealing with intense emotions like anger?

What to Listen For

Relationship between self-compassion and anger – 2:06

Is there a difference between the anger we feel toward others versus the anger we feel toward ourselves?

Healthy strategies to process and work through anger – 11:00
What exercises should you use to work through anger and what should you avoid doing when you’re angry?
What is the difference between compassion and self-compassion?
What three words can you tell yourself to alleviate strong feelings of anger or frustration you’re experiencing?

Is self-compassion just being easy on yourself? – 20:25
What are the three components of self-compassion?

Defining and discovering core values – 29:00
How can you use negative and positive emotions to help you figure out what your core values are?

Learning from compassion-focused therapy – 35:18
What can you learn from compassion-focused therapy to equip you with the tools to better handle intense emotional states so you don’t do something in the moment that you’ll regret?

A full human life is arguably one in which you experience the entire spectrum of human emotions, positive and negative. Negative in this case can be interpreted as the opposite of what we think of as positive emotions, but it doesn’t mean a negative emotion is bad or should be avoided. As a society, we generally look down on or seek to avoid negative emotions such as anger and frustration, which can then lead us to not teach kids how to properly manage their anger. And a lack of anger management within an entire population will spell disaster for an entire generation that is not equipped to process and deal with their emotions in a healthy manner.

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Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here!

Resources from this Episode

Freedom: How Teens Can Use Mindful Compassion to Thrive in a Chaotic World and Grow a Purpose-driven Life by Chris Fraser

Dr. Isabelle’s website

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Peak Mind: Find Your Focus, Own Your Attention, Invest 12 Minutes a Day

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Oct 04, 2021

01:04:51

In today’s episode, we cover focus and attention with Dr. Amishi Jha. Dr. Amishi Jha received her Ph.D. from the University of California–Davis, is a professor of psychology at the University of Miami, and is the Cofounder and Director of Contemplative Neuroscience for the Mindfulness Research and Practice Initiative.

It seems like our attention spans are getting shorter every year, but are they really, what can we do to improve our ability to focus, and how do we deal with the countless entities always clawing for our attention everywhere we look?

What to Listen For

Introduction and Dr. Amishi’s origin story – 9:00

How does meditation better equip us to deal with everything that is fighting for our attention in daily life?

What is attention and why should we care? – 19:24
What are the three components of attention and how do mindfulness practices influence our ability to pay attention?
What mindfulness exercise can you start doing now to begin seeing the benefits of meditation?
Are our attention spans actually getting shorter?
How do we use our brain to combat our own lack of attention or focus?

The Finder Flashlight Practice for developing focus – 31:20
What can you do to help your children learn to pay attention and focus?

What advantages do people with ADD/ADHD have that people without it don’t have?

Improving focus while living under a lot of stress – 48:50
What 12-minute exercise can you do on a daily basis to boost your ability to focus, even in high stress, high demand situations and environments?

Our ability to focus on something for an extended period of time is one of the significant differences between humans and other animals. However, like other animals we can easily be distracted and lose that focus. So what can we do in today’s world where everything in our daily lives is fighting for our attention? We can start by meditating (or implementing a similarly effective mindfulness practice) that can help us cultivate a sense of awareness that isn’t so reactive and easily distracted.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here!

Resources from this Episode

Dr. Amishi’s website

How to Tame Your Wandering Mind (TED Talk by Dr. Amishi)

Dr. Amishi on Twitter

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Sep 27, 2021

01:15:17

In today’s episode, we cover networking with AJ, Johnny, and Michael.

Many of us don’t realize there is more to networking than simply showing up to events and introducing, so what kind of preparation should go into networking events, how do you know what value you have to offer those you meet, and how can you use digital platforms to be the super connector no one forgets?

What to Listen For

Intro to networking and Coach Michael’s recruitment – 0:00

What common misconceptions do people have about networking and interacting with people in your network?
What 3 questions can you ask yourself to prevent you from wasting a life-changing networking opportunity?

Networking hurdles and overcoming them – 9:50
What does science say about why so many of us feel uncomfortable about networking and what can we do about it?
When and where should you avoid networking?
Why is networking about more than just career development?

Social capital and networking – 21:15
What are the 3 components of social capital and why do you need to know your social capital if you want to network effectively?

What are the 2 strategies to networking and why do you need a mix of both in order to be successful at networking?

Effective networking in the digital era – 34:50
What tips can you start using today to build an amazing network and connect with people you look up to?

Why is it important to know your WHY when it comes to networking?
What is the best way to introduce two people in your network?
What are the best practices for following up with people you meet at a networking event (and what should you avoid doing)?

Many of us view networking events as isolated opportunities to meet new people in which you only have the event itself to make new connections. The most effective networkers, however, know that is inefficient because that’s when everyone else is trying to do the same. Great networkers utilize the time before and after the events to start and strengthen new relationships. This can be as easy as messaging the attendees and speakers on LinkedIn before an event letting them know you are looking forward to meeting them and/or hearing their presentations.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here!

Resources from this Episode

Professional Networking Makes People Feel Dirty (HBS Article)

Susan McPherson | Effortlessly Build a World-Class Network by Using These 5 Tips (AOC Podcast Episode)

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast

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Sep 20, 2021

01:15:48

In today’s episode, we cover peak performance and burnout with Carey Nieuwhof. Carey is the author of the best selling “Didn't See It Coming: Overcoming the Seven Greatest Challenges That No One Expects and Everyone Experiences” and the host of one of our favorite podcasts, The Carey Nieuwhof Leadership Podcast.

Introduction

With all of the pressure to increase output and creativity these days, burn out is a real threat, so what are the warning signs you’re entering a dangerous burn out cycle, how can you avoid it, and how can you improve your skill set without risking burn out?

What to Listen For

Introduction and Carey’s history with burnout – 2:00

How do you manage the risks of burnout when building a business or focusing on your career?

What does it mean to be at your best? – 14:10
What is one of the biggest myths about building a fulfilling career and life?
What forms does burnout take and how can you recognize when you need help?

The stress spiral and how to avoid it – 25:09
What are the warning signs you are stuck in the destructive stress spiral?

What are the three types of energy zones we all have in a day and how do you identify them so you know when to do your best work and when to avoid doing work?

Always be working on your gifts and skills – 43:45
How do world-class performers work to improve their talents and abilities?

What do many of us allow our lives to be filled with that we should be saying no to?
What exercise can you use to easily structure your week ahead of time so you don’t end up feeling overwhelmed or burned out?
Why should you set goals for yourself if you want to learn how to start saying no effortlessly?

If you are feeling burnt out at work, it might have less to do with how much you’re working and more to do with when you’re trying to work. It has been shown that humans have a specific window of peak energy during the day, and if you try to push yourself too far outside of that window, the effects can be detrimental to your productivity as well as your physical and mental health. By structuring your day around your individual peak window, you can revitalize your passion and productivity while easily saying no to work and appointments that don’t serve you.

A Word From Our Sponsors

Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 13,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here!

Resources from this Episode

At Your Best: How to Get Time, Energy, and Priorities Working in Your Favor by Carey Nieuwhof

Didn't See It Coming: Overcoming the Seven Greatest Challenges That No One Expects and Everyone Experiences by Carey Nieuwhof

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Brett Hagler on Instagram

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Sep 13, 2021

01:00:55

In today’s episode, we cover finding your life mission and turning it into a business with Brett Hagler. Brett is the CEO and Co-Founder of New Story, a Y Combinator graduate, and a cancer survivor recognized on Forbes’ 30 Under 30 list, named one of the Top 100 Most Intriguing Entrepreneurs by Goldman Sachs, and his company was named among Fast Company’s “Most Innovative Companies in the World” four different times.

It’s no easy task to decide on a life mission, so what can you do figure out what yours is, why is it important to find work you’re passionate about or at least interested in, and how should you handle risk-taking and failure when pursuing a business idea that goes against the grain of mainstream thinking?

What to Listen For

What is New Story and why should you know about it? – 2:04

How did Brett Hagler realize solving homelessness is his life mission?
What can you do to figure out what your life mission is?

Why you should strive to do work you’re passionate about – 17:05
What hidden price do we pay for doing work we don’t find interesting or exciting?
How can 3D printing be used to solve homelessness around the world?
What’s it like going through Y-Combinator as a non-profit organization?
How affordable will 3D-printed houses be and how soon will you be able to buy one?

Building a base of loyal customers when starting a business – 33:50
What can you do to build a genuine connection with your customers when first starting a business that will set you apart from your competitors?

How do you overcome self doubt when trying something new or experiencing success for the first time?
What counterintuitive advice should you think about when starting and scaling a business if you don’t want to lose your best talent to your competition?

Key strategies for handling failures in business – 47:50
What are the two ways to approach risk-taking when running a business and why should you avoid one?

What are some of New Story’s greatest success stories?

It’s true that the journey to finding your life mission is not easy. But if you want to be successful, it's worth taking the time and effort to find what you are passionate about—or at very least interested in doing. When starting a business for yourself, make sure you properly connect with your customers by providing them high-quality products they can't get anywhere else. And when failure strikes (and it will), use a few key strategies to handle tough times until better days come around again. Remember, "failure is just another word for opportunity."

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Resources from this Episode

Brett Hagler’s website

Brett Hagler on LinkedIn

Brett Hagler on Twitter

New Story website

New Story on YouTube

New Story on Instagram

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Jonathan Horowitz on LinkedIn

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Sep 06, 2021

01:10:50

In today’s episode, we cover stress and anxiety with Dr. Jonathan Horowitz. Jonathan Horowitz received his Ph.D. in clinical psychology, and is the CEO and founder of the San Francisco Stress and Anxiety Center where he helps people manage and overcome stress.

Science is showing us that we are dealing with increased levels of stress and anxiety thanks to the pandemic, so what can you do to prevent your stress and anxiety from overwhelming you, how can you prevent burnout, and when do you know it’s time to seek professional help?

What to Listen For

Dr. Jonathan Horowitz’s origin story – 2:06

How easily can other people tell when you’re feeling nervous or anxious in a conversation?
How does perfectionism get in the way of you achieving your goals and what can you do to move past it?
Can you control whether or not people like you?

Warning signs you’re not adequately managing stress – 22:40
What can you do to better manage your stress levels so it doesn’t damage your health and relationships?
How does stress impact your ability to be creative and an effective problem solver?
What can you do to help manage the stress of working from home and not having a clear distinction between home and work?

Preventing burnout by practicing self-care – 37:56
What small but meaningful exercises can you do in your daily life to better take care of yourself so you don’t get overwhelmed by stress?

What should you avoid doing if you don’t want to get overwhelmed by stress?
How has our social anxiety been impacted by COVID and the lockdown and what can we do about it?
How do you know when you should see a therapist?

While short periods of stress (like exercise or solving a difficult problem) can provide countless benefits to our physical and mental wellbeing, long periods of chronic stress can have detrimental effects on our minds and bodies. But what can you do about it when it seems like being stressed out is normal? It comes down to small daily habits that any of us can implement in our lives because we all have a few minutes to spare to take better care of ourselves.

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Resources from this Episode

San Francisco Stress and Anxiety Center

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Anne-Maartje Oud on Twitter

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Aug 30, 2021

01:07:52

In today’s episode, we cover negotiation with Anne-Maartje Oud. Anne is a behavioral advisor, trainer, and the CEO & founder of The Behaviour Company based in Amsterdam.

Your behavior plays an essential role in getting your message across, so what can you do to make sure your message doesn’t get lost, why is emotional validation crucial if you want to be a great leader, and how should you prepare for and handle conflict in the workplace?

What to Listen For

The biggest myths about reading body language – 1:30

What can reading body language tell you about someone and what can it NOT tell you?
What questions can you ask yourself to find out what external and internal factors might be influencing your body language?
What can you do if you are over analyzing your communication to the detriment of your relationships and career?

The brain-body connection and how you feel – 18:05
What are easy ways you can convey trustworthiness in the workplace?
What changes can you make to boost the effectiveness of your speaking and presentation style through Zoom?
What are pacifying behaviors and why do we need to be on the lookout for them when talking to someone or a group of people?

The importance of validation in the workplace – 36:46
What is emotional validation and why do you need to have a handle on it if you want to be an effective leader?

What kind of feedback should you avoid giving if you want to lead your team effectively?

DOs and DON'Ts of dealing with conflict in the workplace – 46:30

What are the 4 ways people use to deal with conflict and which ways should you avoid if you don’t want to lose your relationships?
What can you do to prepare yourself emotionally for a difficult conversation or confrontation so you don’t lose your cool when it matters?
What advice surrounding body language should you avoid at all cost?

A person’s body language communicates a great deal about the person, but it’s not magic. In order to effectively understand body language, it’s important to dispel some of the myths surrounding body language so you know its limits. Body language can give you a glimpse into what a person might be feeling at that moment, but it cannot tell you what they’re thinking.

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Resources from this Episode

Anne-Maartje Oud on LinkedIn

Art of Charm podcast with Joe Navarro

The Importance of Validation by Joe Navarro, Anne-Maartje Oud

Dangerous Personalities by Joe Navarro

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Medvec & Associates: Critical Decision and Negotiation Partners website

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Aug 23, 2021

01:05:18

In today’s episode, we cover negotiation with Dr. Victoria Medvec. Dr. Medvec a master negotiator, Kellogg professor, CEO of Medvec & Associates, and is the author of Negotiate Without Fear: Strategies and Tools to Maximize Your Outcomes.

Negotiating is a part of life, personally and professionally, so how should we be looking at it, how can we remove the fear and anxiety from negotiating, and what strategies can you implement from a professional negotiator to take your negotiating skills to the next level?

What to Listen For

Dr. Victoria Medvec’s origin story – 1:35

What do great negotiators enjoy about the act of negotiating?
What are the biggest fears people have about negotiating that prevent them from getting what they deserve and what can you do to overcome those fears?
What is the most important element of effective negotiation and how can you use it to overcome your fears of negotiating?

Creating win-win negotiation outcomes – 12:59
How can you think about future negotiations in a way that makes both parties excited about the outcome?
What questions can you ask in a negotiation to get a better understanding of what the other party is looking to get out of the negotiation?
What does it mean to prepare for a negotiation and how can you show the other party during the negotiation that you’ve put in the work ahead of time?

Common traps many expert negotiators fall into – 23:07
What are the 3 most common traps experienced negotiators fall into and what can you do to avoid falling into those traps?

How do you bring creativity into negotiating to ensure both parties walk away from the negotiation with a win?
Why are emotion and storytelling important in the art of negotiation?

Managing emotions during negotiations – 37:00

What 4 steps can you take to manage the emotions during negotiations to prevent them from ruining a deal and making you and/or your company look bad?
How do you effectively negotiate your salary to get what you deserve while also giving the company a positive outcome?
How do different generations view negotiation and why is it important?
What are

We typically associate the word “negotiation” with negotiating a raise or negotiating the price of a car, but in reality just about anything can be negotiated. Unfortunately, many of us never try to negotiate because negotiating seems intimidating, or we just assume the price or cost of something is set in stone. If you want to get what you deserve out of life, no one is going to give it to you, you must be willing to know your worth and ask for it.

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Resources from this Episode

Negotiate Without Fear by Victoria Medvec

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Charisma: An Ill-Defined and Ill-Measured Gift

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Aug 16, 2021

00:59:38

In today’s episode, we cover charisma with AJ, Johnny, and Michael.

Charisma can make the difference between a fulfilling life and a depressing lonely existence, but what actually is charisma, why is it so powerful, and how can you develop it to bring out the best in you and the people around you?

What to Listen For

What is charisma? – 1:10

How does science define and perceive charisma?
What is it about charismatic leaders that makes them stand out and what can you learn from them?
Can charisma be learned?

The importance of being present – 11:02
What are the three internal dials you can play with in order to figure out the level of charisma best suited for your personality?
What does it mean to be present and why is it important if you want to be charismatic?

Turning up your enthusiasm – 26:30
What do many people get wrong about enthusiasm and what does it mean to live with more enthusiasm?

What simple changes can you make right now to be more enthusiastic in your interactions with other people?
What easy steps can you take to increase your enthusiasm and put you in a better mood?

Confidence is the key to unlocking your potential – 40:15

When is confidence most useful and why do those times also allow you to strengthen your confidence?

Charisma might feel like something a person just has, but like many traits, it can be broken down into easily understood components. Once you understand what those components are, you can then take steps to develop them and allow your personality to shine by being a more charismatic version of yourself.

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Resources from this Episode

Skills vs. Attributes: What Should You Focus On

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The Caretaker - Everywhere At The End Of Time

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Aug 09, 2021

00:49:25

In today’s episode, we cover memory improvement and competition with Dr. Johannes Mallow. Johannes is a 2-times World Memory Champion, completed a PhD thesis on the topic of Magnetic resonance imaging (MRI), and worked as a researcher and engineer at the University of Magdeburg.

Our ability to recall complex information is one of our defining characteristics as humans, but what do we get wrong about memory, what daily exercises can you perform to improve your memory, and what can you learn about memory from a memory world champion?

What to Listen For

Dr. Johannes Mallow’s journey into memory games – 1:46

What do people enjoy about memory competitions?
What exercises can you do to train your memory and improve it?
How does Dr. Johannes Mallow memorize a deck of cards in 20 seconds?

The science of memory vs the sport of memory – 14:35
What is the brain great at memorizing and how can you use that fact to avoid forgetting important information?
How does training for memory sports impact your memory in your day to day life?

Simple strategies for memorizing people’s names – 21:39
What can you do if you find yourself in a high pressure situation and you need to remember something but your mind goes blank?

What daily memory exercises can anyone perform to improve it?

Most common misconceptions about training memory – 39:06

Why should we be concerned about developing our memory when we have powerful devices at our fingertips to remember things for us?

The secret 2000 year old memory technique – 51:13

What is the memory palace technique and how can you use it to remember almost anything?
What is the keyword method and how can you use it to learn new languages?

Your memory is like a muscle. The more you train your ability to recall information, the better you will become at it. Humans have been working to improve their memory for thousands of years and have come up with some great techniques along the way, and if you have five minutes to spare each day, you can improve your memory so you stop forgetting names of people you just met, important upcoming events, and your anniversary!

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Resources from this Episode

mallow.com/">Dr. Johannes Mallow’s website

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Aug 02, 2021

01:11:06

In today’s episode, we cover becoming exceptional with Joe Navarro. Joe is a retired FBI special agent and recognized as one of the world’s foremost authorities on reading nonverbal communication. He has co-authored many international best sellers including What Every Body is Saying, The Dictionary of Body Language, Advanced Interviewing Techniques, and his latest one, Be Exceptional: Master the Five Traits That Set Extraordinary People Apart.

Being an exceptional human doesn’t require anything out of the ordinary, but there are a handful of necessary traits to focus on if you want to be exceptional, so what are they and how do you develop them?

What to Listen For

What does it mean to be exceptional – 1:53

Why aren’t we taught how to be exceptional or charming when we’re growing up, and how can we learn to be so today?

The five traits of exceptional people – 15:21
What does self-mastery look like in today’s world and why is it important if you want to be exceptional at anything?
Why is the skill of observation important and what can you do to improve it?
What is more important to us than validation and why do we mistake it for seeking perfection?

The biggest misconception about giving validation – 38:30
Can you give validation to someone while also disagreeing with them?
How are validation and trust related?

Strategies to start divisive conversations on the right foot – 45:02

How do you have a productive conversation with someone who is clearly married to an ideology and doesn’t want to listen?
What simple exercise can you use to better understand yourself and your worldview?

Anyone can be exceptional, but not everyone is willing to understand what it takes and work at it. For example, being observant is a trait of exceptional people according to Joe Navarro, and being observant seems like a rather basic trait, doesn’t it? The problem is most people don’t think about or question what they observe. When most people think they’re being observant, they’re really just noticing something and instantly passing judgement on it.

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Resources from this Episode

Joe Navarro’s website

Be Exceptional by Joe Navarro

What Every BODY is Saying by Joe Navarro

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McPherson Strategies website

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Jul 26, 2021

00:59:55

In today’s episode, we cover human connection and networking with Susan McPherson. Susan has 25+ years of experience in marketing, public relations, and sustainability communications, and is the author of The Lost Art of Connecting: The Gather, Ask, Do Method for Building Meaningful Relationships.

As we emerge from lockdown, connecting and reconnecting can feel difficult, so what can you do to set yourself apart, forge lasting connections with those you meet, and reconnect with friends you haven’t spoken to in years?

What to Listen For

How lonely and disconnected are we according to science – 3:05

Why does negativity spread more on the internet than positivity?
What is the Gather, Ask, Do method and how can you use it to form stronger connections with the people around you?

The critical objective of today’s youth in a digital age – 14:38
What is the power of reciprocity and how can it help you grow an amazing network?
What questions can you ask if you genuinely want to help the people around you?
What questions should you avoid at all cost if you sincerely want to help people?

Tips for introverts to connect better – 28:24
What is pre-connecting and how can you use it to make networking easier and less stressful while also being more effective as an introvert?

What should you focus on when meeting people at networking events and what should you NOT focus on?
What tips can you use to reconnect with people after the pandemic/lockdown?

The big myths around connecting with others – 44:40

What simple tips can you use to amplify your effectiveness when meeting people and creating unforgettable first impressions?
What are the best five follow up tips when networking to make sure your hard work doesn’t go to waste?

Connecting with others is one of the key ways to get ahead. With the tips and strategies in this episode, you’ll create deep connections and your connections will multiply exponentially. Even as an introvert, you can forge lasting relationships and reconnect with old friends you haven’t spoken to in years. Take these lessons from our experts on how to become a force of nature who gets things done effortlessly while creating lifelong bonds along the way!

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Resources from this Episode

Susan McPherson on Twitter

Susan McPherson on LinkedIn

The Lost Art of Connecting by Susan McPherson

5 Ways to Listen Better TED Talk by Julian Treasure

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Jul 19, 2021

01:16:07

In today’s episode, we talk about MeetUp with David Siegel. David is the CEO of MeetUp and the host of the new podcast Keep Connected.

People are feeling lonely now more than ever, so what can you do if you’re feeling lonely, where can you go to meet new friends who share your interests, and what is the cheat code to making new friends anywhere you go?

What to Listen For

How did the Art of Charm get started using MeetUp? – 2:50
When creating an account on MeetUp, should you try to join MeetUp groups or create/host your own?
Why are people suffering from loneliness now more than ever and what can you do about it?

The evolution of MeetUp through the pandemic – 10:51
How did the pandemic affect people’s willingness to meet up using sites like MeetUp?
Is it a good time to start attending events and MeetUp groups in person yet?

Are MeetUp groups welcoming to introverts? – 24:15
What kinds of MeetUp groups should an introvert attend and avoid?
Is MeetUp a good tool for professional networking?
What sports should you look into if you’re interested in trying something new and popular?
Can you find MeetUp groups that center around happiness and mental well-being?

The cheat code to meeting a lot of people – 43:52
What are 3 traits of the best organizers on MeetUp?
How do the best hosts on MeetUp provide great experiences for the attendees?
What are the 3 steps in giving value that solidify a connection with guests and members who attend your events?
What are the top 5 best practices in networking can you implement in your next MeetUp event?

In a post-COVID world, people are struggling to figure out ways to be social again and get a handle on the loneliness they experienced during the lockdown. What better way to do both than find a group of likeminded humans on a site like MeetUp? One of the major advantages MeetUp groups/events have for people who aren’t sure how to make friends is that MeetUp self-selects for people who are open to meeting new people. That means people who attend MeetUp groups are going to be friendly, welcoming, and approachable.

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Resources from this Episode

MeetUp

Keep Connected Podcast hosted by MeetUp CEO David Siegel

David Siegel on LinkedIn

David Siegel on Twitter

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Jul 12, 2021

01:10:45

In today’s episode, we cover the mastery of sales with Jeb Blount. Jeb is the best-selling author of over 13 books and among the world’s most respected thought leaders on sales, leadership, and customer experience. He helps leaders to develop leadership and coaching skills and shows them how to apply a more effective organizational design and cultivate a high performance sales culture.

Sales is often considered a field for extroverts, so why do world-class salespeople consider introverts to have the greatest potential, what can you do as an introvert to become a great salesperson, and what is the biggest challenge introverts face in sales?

What to Listen For

How Jeb Blount get started in sales – 1:06

Can introverts be world-class performers in sales?

What are the three myths about sales? – 5:35

What are the five basic questions people ask themselves about you when talking to you?
What do so many people get wrong about being great at sales?
What is the greatest gift you can give another human being and why is that gift critical in the world of sales?

The one problem introverts have in sales – 9:46
What are the two types of listening and when should you use each one?

What can you do to stop making assumptions? – 23:45
What is the WAIT acronym and how can you use it to keep yourself in check when interacting with potential customers?
Why are moments of silence in conversation so important in sales?

Theses traits mean certain failure for people new to sales – 35:00
What is one of the biggest hurdles entrepreneurs face when starting a business for the first time?

What can you do to overcome yesterday’s mistakes every day you wake up?

Strategies for handling objections – 46:45
What framework can you use for overcoming objections?

What is the difference between a good salesperson and a great salesperson?

Introverts aren’t regularly associated with great salesmanship, but as the world evolves, introverts have an edge in sales. People want to be valued and they want to be understood. The more you can listen and ask questions, the better idea you will have about how you can solve their problem.

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Resources from this Episode

Jeb Blount’s website

Sales Gravy

Sales EQ by Jeb Blount

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

The Sales Podcast hosted by Wes Schaeffer

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Jul 05, 2021

00:58:50

In today’s episode, we cover the fundamentals of sales with Wes Schaeffer. Wes is the creator and owner of The Sales Whisperer, a sales training, marketing and consulting firm with an emphasis on CRM & email marketing software sales, support and optimization.

Sales skills are integral to our daily lives because we are regularly trying to solve problems and get other people to buy into our ideas, so what are the fundamentals of great salesmanship, how can you work to improve your sales skills, and why do you need to be a great listener to be great at sales?

What to Listen For

How did Wes Schaeffer get started in sales – 3:00

Do you need to be an entrepreneur to get the most out of life?
How should you think about your day job if you dream of being your own boss one day?

The biggest misconception about people who are not in sales – 8:10

Why do we need some degree of sales skills to be successful in all areas of life and what can you do to improve yours?

The new ABC’s of sales – 12:35
What is the difference between influencing, persuading, and manipulating someone?
What do great sales people understand about the actual significance of the transaction stage in making a sale?

What is the difference between mediocre and great salesmanship? – 24:00
What mistakes do new people in sales make to shoot themselves in the foot over the long term?
What should you be trying to identify when talking to a potential customer that will allow you to determine the perfect product or service to address their needs?

The two halves of listening – 33:40
Why do people experience beginner's luck?

What should you focus on when improving your sales skills?
What is the difference between education and training?

Anytime you are trying to influence or persuade someone, you are utilizing sales skills. It can be something as simple as convincing your friends where the best place to get dinner is, or persuading your boss to give you a two week extension on a deadline.

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Share your vulnerabilities, victories, and questions in our 17,000-member private Facebook group at theartofcharm.com/challenge. This is a unique opportunity where everyone — both men and women — celebrate your accountability on the way to becoming the best version of yourself. Register today here!

Resources from this Episode

Wes Schaeffer's website

The Sales Whisperer Way by Wes Schaeffer

Check in with AJ and Johnny!