Welcome to Hello Shite — the podcast that attempts to polish culture's biggest turds. Or, if it can't do that, at least spray them liberally with Febreeze Mist and present them in a slightly jaunty hat.
9 Available Episodes (9 Total)Average duration: 00:50:43
Mar 07, 2018
The Next Big Thing
00:50:02
Marc and Edward declare war on the obscure in this episode, by cruelly mocking a weak - and largely forgotten - Channel 4 documentary series from the 1990s.
'The Next Big Thing' follows the fortunes of top indie-style band FMB: from gigging in London's fashionable Islington (and supporting erstwhile rock behemoths Guns N' Wankers), all the way to the 1993 Reading Festival.
There are ups and downs for Hello Shite's hosts too.
Due to the long gap between episodes, Marc introduces Edward to his replacement - before setting out on the road to chock out some serious power chords...
Nov 17, 2017
In the Dead of Shite – Listeners' Ghost Stories at The Cock Tavern
00:47:36
Hello Shite’s listeners’ ghost stories.
Recorded live. At Halloween. In a haunted location. With a séance.
There were technical difficulties, a drunk presenter, a 1986 Sam Fox calendar – and a lot of weirdness.
Oct 27, 2017
Halloween Special: Ghostwatch
00:40:22
The first of our Halloween specials: in which Edward and Marc fondly remember Stephen Volk's remarkable 1992 mockumentary Ghostwatch – on its 25th anniversary!
Expect shell suits, Ade Edmondson impressions, gloryholes, professional Yorkshiremen, curtain lurking, drawn-on willies, cupboard capering – and, of course, scattered dog foetuses!
Mr. Pipes will see you now…
Sep 26, 2017
James Bond: Moonraker
01:10:51
This month, Team Shite overanalyse the Roger Moore James Bond film ‘Moonraker' (1979).
Expect flappy slacks, heavy-handed henchmen, pudding-bowl haircuts, tiny truncheons, killer lipsticks, double-taking pigeons, Kung-Fu monks, satin burgling shirts, very intuitive dogs – and a shit-load of clumsy product placement.
Serving suggestion: wash down podcast with a warm 7 Up, whilst trying to get your wrinkly end away on a grassy knoll.
Aug 18, 2017
The Twilight Zone: The Man in a Bottle
00:53:07
This month, Team Shite overanalyse the 1960 Twilight Zone episode The Man in the Bottle!
Expect non-dimensional characters, manky shawls, above-the-odds wish-granting, magical Chianti bottles, acne-scarred genies – and, of course, fat Hitler.
Serving suggestion: wash down podcast #8 with a vial of poison, whilst an unconvincing Nazi burbles at you in a broad Italian accent
Jul 04, 2017
Star Trek: Mirror Mirror
00:55:15
Marc and Edward overanalyse the Star Trek episode ‘Mirror Mirror’(1967) in this not-so-special sci-fi episode of Hello Shite!
Expect gilded tits, fishing waders, extraneous beards, velour crop tops, sexual lieutenants, agonising shower cubicles, shit stunt-doubles and a murderous alien device that Marc naturally assumed was some kind of sex toy (yes, this does happen).
Serving suggestion: wash down podcast #7 with lashings of kiwi lemon 20/20 whilst simultaneously tricking a stranger into snogging you. Like some kind of paunchy hero.
May 22, 2017
Doctor Who: Day of the Daleks
00:52:54
Edward and Marc look at the classic Doctor Who serial ‘Day of the Daleks' (1972) in this special sci-fi episode of Hello Shite!
Expect ultramodern Milton Keynes, camp Daleks, alien Terry Nutkins, low-speed trike chases, Officer’s Club fashions, and a surprising dependency on red knicker fabric.
Serving suggestion: wash down podcast #6 with a ripe Gorgonzola and lashings of sardonic wine. (Preferably stolen.)
Apr 21, 2017
Most Haunted: Bodmin Moor Gaol
00:43:32
Marc and Edward learn to wax spiritual in this new, spooky episode of Hello Shite, which overanalyses the popular paranormal investigation show Most Haunted. Expect British weather, weak South African accents, silent fog horns, assiduously gelled hair, puffer jackets and heavily-discounted scones. Oh, and one extremely tedious séance. (Fortunately for us all, Derek Acorah’s on cracking form…)
Mar 27, 2017
East 17: The Reunion
00:42:52
Edward and Marc turn up the sexiness in this new episode of Hello Shite - and there is nothing more devastating than two (ostensibly straight) middle-aged men discussing who the pretty one in East 17 is.
Featuring gratuitous pie-eating, hardcore violence, shit RB, psychic mediums, Essex karaoke, Blakey from 'On the Buses'...plus, thrills, pills and plumber's mates.
Mar 07 | 00:50:02
The Next Big Thing
Nov 17 | 00:47:36
In the Dead of Shite – Listeners' Ghost Stories at The Cock Tavern
A podcast full of sound and fury and representing nothing. The two presenters are great fun and their very different - but equally silly - personalities make for very good listening. The Doctor Who and the East 17 episodes are particularly good.