Hello and welcome to the Travelling Introvert. Want to talk

about guilt? Guilt comes up a lot in many different ways and one of the things

I found is it is a real driving force to what people do and why they do it. And

guilt guilt can come up in many ways that can be detrimental but.

Also can be helpful. But a lot of it is cultural.

And what you've been taught to do. And if you're a people

pleaser, this is a huge thing. It's not necessarily about pleasing people, it's

the guilt involved if you don't. So, are you guilty for no reason? Guilt is a

feeling that everyone experiences at one time or another and that is fine. It

is an emotion that tells you that you've done something wrong. But while guilt

is a normal and healthy emotion, there may be times where you end up feeling

guilty for no reason. And this type of guilt is known as irrational guilt and

is often the result of irrational thinking. And what this means is that you are

thinking about something in a way that's not based on reality. The thoughts you

are having are not a fact. There is no data supporting that information. For

example, if you feel guilty because you think you should have known better than

doing something even though you had no way to know about it, you're wasting that

emotion. You end up feeling that guilt. Alternatively, you may feel guilty

because you could have done more to prevent something from happening. As a

result, you just made the wrong choice, which may lead to anxiety and even

depression.

So we need to talk about ways to kind of look at guilt.

First of all, figure out is the guilt based on data or is it just a thought? If

it is just a thought, you need to acknowledge that guilt that you're currently

feeling is irrational. Remember that just because you feel guilty doesn't mean

you actually are guilty of anything. If you can convince yourself or point

yourself in the right direction and reframe and take a look at the data and see

that the guilt is irrational, it will be easier for you to let go of it. Write

down your feelings so you can read them out loud. Take notice of the areas that

are just thoughts and not fact and not based on data and are not realistic.

Circle them or write a note, whatever it takes to make you aware of how

irrational it is, then identify the source. Once you have acknowledged that the

guilt is irrational, it's really crucial to figure out where that is coming

from. What's in your past that might be causing you to feel guilty? Often the

source of guilt isn't even something that you should feel guilty about.

If you can identify the basis of, let's be honest, the

shame, then you'll be able to better deal with it. And sometimes that takes

time and practise, and that's okay. It's not something that will happen

overnight. This is a continual practise. Especially if you're the kind of

person who's been feeling guilty for most of your life and say you're now 2030

or 40 years old.

It is going to take a long time for you to unlearn.

That automatic a lot of the time. Feeling of Guilt one thing

you can do is try to change your thinking patterns. This means learning to

question your thoughts and evaluating whether they are based on data and facts

or reality. If you find that your thoughts are not based on facts, then you can

start to challenge them. Another thing you can do is talk it out. Another way

to overcome that irrational guilt is to find someone to talk to. It could be a

friend, a family member, a therapist, somebody that you trust. Talking through

your feelings and talking about them can help you understand them better and

might help you get answers. It is essential to take action to overcome feeling

guilty all the time. It shouldn't be a habit. And to be fair, a lot of the time

it is just because of the way that we've been conditioned. This might mean

forgiving yourself, for whatever it is you feel guilty about, or taking steps

to make sure that you don't repeat the behaviour that caused that guilt in the

first place. Taking action will help you overcome that guilt and move on. Don't

get me wrong.

Everyone struggles with guilt in some way, shape or form.

You are not alone. It is a common emotion. But there are things that you can do

to overcome it. Talking to someone about changing your thinking patterns and

with mindfulness and time, you'll learn to overcome that irrational guilt which

will help you move on with your life and your career. Thank you for listening.

This is Janice at the Career Introvert, helping you build your brand and get hired. Have a great rest of your week.