with: Boots Raingear   Isfahan   Shell Game   Kendrick Lobstar   Sauce   Lemon  

reading: The Monarchy Forum

Content provided by Sauce. Edited by Lemon.

I really don't know how the people of royalcello dot website toolbox dot com found each other, but they've found each other. And all of the posters here believe in a single inalienable right: The Right To Rule, or rather, to be ruled, sometimes by royalcello himself who gets very testy if you say anything unkind about Charles III. Look, none of the people featured in this episode know much (if anything) about The Monarchy, but they do know they like it, and at least one of them knows The Hapsburgs belong in Spain.

This week, The F Plus wants Catherine The Great to sit on our face.

Music used:

1. David Bowie - Queen Bitch
2. Prefab Sprout - The King of Rock n' Roll

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Jack Chick   John Toast   Dijon Du Jour   K Thor Jensen   Lemon  

reading: peefans.com

Content provided by Dr. Activisionary. Edited by Lemon.

This episode is about pee fans such as fannywatcher, uniloo, Wet Man J, Iron Bladderman, Greedy Needy Girl, P155wet, girlwipes, Slick Gracey, Miss Piss, wet wulf, Al Fresco, and MegaPoop Tech. I'm just writing down those usernames because I found them all very funny.

This week, The F Plus learns the term for a manager who is somehow also a woman.

Music used:

1. Cut Chemist - What's The Altitude (ft. Hymnal)
2. Warrant - Cherry Pie (Sing King Karaoke)
3. Lady Leshurr - Juice

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Portaxx   Frank West   Lemon   Jack Chick  

reading: applerankings.com

Content provided by Alqemizzy. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

Self described appleist Brian Frange has some serious-assed opinions about different types of apples, and he wants to share all of them. And that's... honestly, that's entirely what this episode is about, Brian Frange's opinions about different types of apples.

This week, The F Plus sees a tasty unwipe anus.

Music used:

1. The Andrews Sisters - Don't Sit Under the Apple Tree (With Anyone Else But Me)
2. David Heitler-Klevans - Apples and Bananas

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Bunnybread   Victor Laszlo   K Thor Jensen   Lemon  

reading: songmeanings.com

Content provided by Smallest Sasquatch. Edited by Lemon.

Song lyrics are an indelible part of our collective cultural confidence, but can often be a puzzle. For all of these popular songs, what do the lyrics actually mean? Well, we're visiting SongMeanings.com to hear a bunch of bad theories explained amongst infighting and sex bragging.

This week, The F Plus is with the bear, and the bear is with the bear, and the bear is with the boat (you nimno).

Music used:

1. Fever Ray - Kandy
2. Aphex Twin - Windowlicker (Funbox Karaoke)
3. Got A Girl - La La La

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Lemon   Jack Chick   Achilles' Heelies   Nutshell Gulag   Turtle   Boots Raingear  

reading: goodreads.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

Let's speak honestly for a moment: We're all intelligent, thoughtful, sexual beings, right? And as such, we desire intelligent, thoughtful, well-written pornography, don't we? I dunno, but anyway here's some crap.

This week, The F Plus learns the meaning of banal anal.

Music used:

1. Talking Heads - The Book I Read
2. Yung Humma ft. Flynt Flossy - Lemme Smang It

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Portaxx   Shell Game   Kendrick Lobstar   Lemon  

reading: clips4sale.com   f-list.net  

Content provided by Sinestro,Lewdvig Tittgenstein. Edited by Lemon.

Of course, there's a lot of different ways for people to internalize their own effect on the environment, but the subjects of this episode have become super horny about it. We're starting things out on clips4sale reading the description of videos where women pollute the environment, then over to F List for some perverted pollutin' profiles, and finally closing with some Lorax/Fern Gully slashfic that probably didn't need to happen.

This week, The F Plus is a maybe on canonballing.

Music used:

1. Guts ft. Leron Thomas - Man Funk
2. Psych Beatz - Crunk Muzik
3. Baxter Dury - Saliva Hog

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Kumquatxop   Bunnybread   Nutshell Gulag   Lemon  

reading: digimonbelievers.forumotion.com

Content provided by Doctor Interrogative. Edited by Lemon.

Project DigiClipse may or may not be a cult founded upon the spiritual belief in the childrens' cartoon Digimon. And it's time for us to learn more. We're starting at Facebook, but moving into several forums thru the ages to listen to brothers and sisters of the faith testify.

This week, The F Plus get head from Gurlemurglemon.

Music used:

1. 16 Horsepower - Black Soul Choir
2. 16 Horsepower - For Heaven’s Sake (Live)

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Jack Chick   Frank West   Shell Game   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Doctor Interrogative. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

I know, we were surprised as well. But here we are, visiting r/UnpopularOpinion and it turns out there's some bad opinions in here. We weren't gonna watch what happens, but it says "watch next".

This week, The F Plus stands still and moves the goalposts around.

Music used:

1. FEAR - New York's Alright If You Like Saxophones
2. Type O Negative - We Hate Everyone

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Isfahan   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: creepypasta.com

Content provided by Doctor Interrogative. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

Okay, so for this episode the plan was for us to read the worst-rated stories on Creepypasta.com, but we spent like half that time on some dude's insistence that his boner for the Venom symbiote is the cure for liberalism.

This week, The F Plus vows to never turn left again.

Music used:

1. Orgy of the Dead soundtrack - I Am Criswell/Let's Turn Back (Jaime Mendoza-Nava)
2. Frank Zappa - Letter From Jeepers

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Achilles' Heelies   Cheapskate   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

Are you looking for love? Well as it happens there's a lot of people on Reddit, so that's probably a good place to start. We're going to be looking into a few different subreddits for personals ads, including r/cf4cf (childfree hardcore) r/AgeGapPersonals, r/VirginityExchange, r/MBTIDating and r/RandomActsOfBlowjob in search of available singles, and we're going to learn exactly why they're single.

This week, F Plus is offering distance kink education.

Music used:

1. Mitski - Nobody
2. Viagra Boys - Girls and Boys

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Achilles' Heelies   Frank West   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: overunity.com

Content provided by Doctor Interrogative. Edited by Lemon.

Good news everybody! The forum members of OverUnity have solved all our energy problems. They've created perpetual motion machines, 3 million terawatt batteries, balloons which are heavier than lead and other assorted contraptions that provide much more energy than they'd ever require. Only one problem: They can't tell you any specifics, because of Google. We're spending an hour and a half solving all the world's problems, and we're getting rich besides.

This week, The F Plus will sue you if you infringe our Boomer Blocker® patent.

Music used:

1. Viagra Boys - The Cognitive Trade-Off Hypothesis
2. Marcia Griffiths - Electric Boogie

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jack Chick   Victor Laszlo   Ironicus   Lemon  

reading: skydin.com

Content provided by dijon du jour. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

If your chakras are all out of wack and you're in the market for new ugly jewelry, Skydin Zeal would love to be your supplier. The owner of a website with where every single word is printed in every single color (and with bevels and gradients besides) you may get lost along your way, but when you're done you'll lose weight because your flatware will physically prevent you from eating.

The week, The F Plus wants one of those big pussy cars like what Joey Rembrandt paints.

Music used:

1. 50 Cent - Magic Stick
2. DJ Hodor - Emperor

September 17th @ 12:00 EST.

The internet is filled with lunatics, perverts and conspiracy nuts.

Reading their words is harmful.

Doing it for 24 hours is insane.

with: Boots Raingear   Kumquatxop   Jack Chick   Shell Game   Dijon Du Jour   Lemon  

reading: purelifeenema.com   reddit.com   michimagic.com   frugaldomme.com   cdpunishment.com   thehealthboard.com  

Content provided by Cat Examiner. Edited by Lemon.

Health & wellness is a complicated issue, and so is the butthole, but fortunately this is an issue that combines both those things. This is an episode of enema recipes - from coffee to dish soap to cocaine, and all points in between, and we're going to have a whole lot of fun with this until Auntie Flo shows up. Also apparently Lemon is a boomer for the first half of this episode? Gross.

This week, The F Plus takes a handful of Debbie Downers.

Music used:

1. King Missile - Up My Ass
2. Boots Raingear ft. Lemon - What Was That Joke?
3. Mystikal - Shake Ya Ass

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   John Toast   Nutshell Gulag   Sanguinary Novel   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Lewdvig Tittgenstein,Sinestro. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The redditors of r/SemenRetention are believers in a clandestine warfare they believe has been waged to keep down the underclass by continually robbing them of their semen. These true believers therefore are determined to maximize their personal inventory of semen... by any means necessary.

This week, The F Plus summons The Aetheric Ass.

Music used:

1. Quiet Riot - Cum On Feel The Noize
2. 1.6 Band - Pushing Shit Back Into My Ass

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Jack Chick   Achilles' Heelies   Kumquatxop   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: loohan.com

Content provided by Tipsy Almond. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

Loohan doesn't care much for Reptilians. Or anyone else for that matter. You see, Loohan's general worldview is... actually, really hard to suss out out. He believes in space monsters, and religious conspiracies, and some weird race/gender stuff we cut out of this episode, but he has the intellectual thruline of a streetcorner man wearing a sandwich board. It's a delight!

This week, The F Plus needs to consult with The Committee.

Music used:

1. Coburn - We Interrupt This Program
2. Talking Heads - Mind

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Victor Laszlo   Nutshell Gulag   Adam Bozarth   Achilles' Heelies   Lemon  

reading: cryptidz.fandom.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Lemon.

Rather than describe what's happening on The Crytpidz Wiki, I'll let the site describe itself:

Cryptids are monsters... except that cryptids could actually exist! When talking about Bigfoot or the Loch Ness Monster you're talking about something that could live right on this Earth right now! On Cryptid Wiki, we document all of the possible information you can get about cryptids and determine if they're real or not.

This week, The F Plus likes Utah, and that's pretty dang interesting!

Music used:

1. David Bowie - Scary Monsters (Live in 1983)
2. !!! - Even When The Water's Cold

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Shell Game   Kumquatxop   Lemon  

reading: hucows.com

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

Hucows (a portmanteau of "human" and "cows") is a word to describe a special kind of lactation fetishist — a gender-divided community (the cows and the farmers), who are into the idea of woman as lactation machines. And sure, you assume this community is bonkers, and you're right, but there's still a number of surprises in here.

This week, The F Plus wants you to punch our milk bags.. NICE!!!

Music used:

1. The Suburbs - Cows
2. The Suburbs - Tape Your Wife To The Ceiling
3. The Suburbs - Rattle My Bones

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Frank West   Zarla   Dijon Du Jour   Lemon  

reading: thevalkyrie.com

Content provided by Sinestro,Lewdvig Tittgenstein. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

In 1996, Diana The Valkyrie set up a website using raw HTML and her own computer in order to provide erotica for people who like the idea of strong women crushing weak men. And now, 25 years later, there's an entire library of material, plenty of it absolutely horrific... If you're new to The F Plus, just be aware this one gets pretty brutal pretty quickly.

This week, Kathy Lee Hulks Out, so just like... prepare yourself emotionally for that.

Music used:

1. Richard Wagner - Flight of the Valkyries
2. M.I.A. - Bad Girls

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Portaxx   Isfahan   Shell Game   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: tumblr.com

Content provided by Doctor Interrogative. Edited by Lemon.

In 2012, Dr. Seuss' widow and the Despicable Me company released a movie called The Lorax. It is entirely valueless, but that's not the point. The point is that the movie had a skinny boy who sang and Tumblr has horny girls on it and so the inevitable happened: The Once-ler Fandom. It mostly involves a character with no traits whatsoever making out with clones of himself. But also, there's a weird part?

This week, The F Plus trades our panties for a half a peck of sanity.

Music used:

1. The Lorax (2012) OST - How Bad Can I Be?
2. Billy Idol - Dancing With Myself

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Victor Laszlo   Adam Bozarth   Achilles' Heelies   Jack Chick   Lemon  

reading: answers.yahoo.com

Content provided by Mz. Saturn. Edited by Lemon.

After over 15 years of cultivating some of the dumbest questions The Internet has ever pondered, a series of truly horrific business decisions forced Yahoo Answers to shut down permanently on May 4th of 2021. Our memorial episode may not be timely, it may not be well thought out, and it may not be informative - but in all those ways, this episode is representative of Yahoo Answers itself.

This week, The F Plus is burning all our documents (but unrelated to that, Jeff had a fantastic orange)

Music used:

1. Mission of Burma - Academy Fight Song
2. Lush - Ciao!

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Victor Laszlo   K Thor Jensen   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Semantic Weeb. Edited by Boots Raingear.

Hang on, didn't the F Plus do a Mandela Effect episode before? Well, this reality has us going to the r/MandelaEffect subreddit, before realizing that r/Retconned is even stupider and spending all our time there instead.

This week, The F Plus is gonna drink Goldschläger until the loaf shifts.

Music used:

1. Archers of Loaf - Wrong
2. Rob Base & DJ E-Z Rock & Lemon - It Takes Two

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   John Toast   Sanguinary Novel   Dijon Du Jour   Lemon  

reading: tumblr.com

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

Inteligence iz a u konw, relativ concept, and of absolutely kinda relativ uz. While many wudd venerate intellect and self-determination as key factorz of absolutely living a ful life, dere are otherz hu feal, like, such qualitiez are inherently unladylike. Now, dat may be concerning enugh by itself, butt it'z even more concerning when yah consider people are geting a boner fwom it. WE're spending ur evening on Tumblr and looking dwugh a absolutely considerable amunt of feederism in order to transform into bimboz.

Thiz weak, Thi F Pluz believez in ya. U can do it cockbwain!

Music used:

1. Nirvana - Dumb (Unplugged)
2. Jim Reeves - BIMBO

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Lou Fernandez   Sanguinary Novel   Lemon  

reading: chocmess.com   sploshuk.co.uk   stickystoriesblog.wordpress.com   reddit.com  

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

The Urban Dictionary defines sploshing as “a sexual/sensual food exchange, in which at least one person covers another person in foods of different tastes, textures, and temperatures.” So with that, let's go to Shokolada's Messy Story archive and get ourselves properly gunged.

This week, The F Plus opens our panties for you.

Music used:

1. IDLES - I'm Scum
2. IDLES - Model Village

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Bunnybread   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: advicinators.com

Content provided by Kanyesutra. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

Predating some of the more well-known question and answer sites, the website Advicinators dates back all the way to 2003, and it hasn't changed a whole lot in the decades since. Teenagers will ask a question, typically about sexual health, and "columnists" will offer advice, typically unhelpful. And then at the end, we'll play a game about what site we're on.

This week, The F Plus gets a real nice Fing Ring.

Music used:

1. Girls Aloud - No Good Advice
2. Weird Al Yankovic - Dare to be Stupid

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Lemon   John Toast   Portaxx   Frank West   Shell Game   Boots Raingear  

reading: jwagemakers.wordpress.com

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

Jeroen Wagemakers has a fetish, and he's been blogging about it since 2006. You see, Jeroen likes perms, but like, a lot. A whole lot. It really cannot be overstated how much Jeroen loves perms, and I know that because he's been trying to do just that for 15 years but he doesn't seem to be nearly done.

This week, The F Plus makes a joke once or twice.

Music used:

1. Soul Coughing - Rolling
2. Alex Puddu - Kinky Hairdresser

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Lemon   Achilles' Heelies   Ironicus   Shell Game   Boots Raingear  

reading: cagliastrotheironring.com

Content provided by A Meat. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The Sorceress Cagliastro is an author, a teacher, a necromancer, a bloodwitch, a haunted doll maker, a 3D printmaker, and a relentless huckster. To that end, she has a whole lot of crap you can buy and classes you can take, as long as you promise you won't ever share anything you've learned with anyone else. It's a blood oath, I suppose.

This week, The F Plus is filling your head with graveyard dirt.

Music used:

1. Killing Joke - Love Like Blood
2. Lou Rawls - Season of the Witch

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Nutshell Gulag   Dijon Du Jour   Lemon  

reading: hybridchildrencommunity.com

Content provided by Smallest Sasquatch. Edited by Lemon.

Do you have alien-human hybrid children you've never met? Well it turns out that simply reading this means that you do. We know, we were surprised too. We're visiting the Hybrid Children Community - a group of people of similar class and ethnic makeup who want to tell you about their imaginary children. And then they want to share recipes.

This week, The F Plus is screaming with a huge smile.

Music used:

1. Pink Turns Blue - Walking On Both Sides
2. Ugly Duckling - A Little Samba

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Kumquatxop   Frank West   Shell Game   Lemon  

reading: fetlife.com

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

This episode is all poetry, and that poetry is entirely sourced from Fetlife.

This week, How more intense is The F Plus' hunger, Cameron?

Music used:

1. Suuns - 2020
2. PJ Harvey - Down By The Water (karaoke)
3. Madcon - Beggin'

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Adam Bozarth   Isfahan   Lemon  

reading: fandom.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69,dijon du jour. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

The Dream Fiction Wiki is a place where people work very hard to catalog, annotate and describe fake things that never happened. And while this may seem like a useless exercise, the actual determination of "which fake thing is a canonically real fake thing" is a topic that has caused a significant amount of drama in the community.

This week, uhhh.... so what's this episode about?

Music used:

1. Magnétophone - Kel's Vintage Thought
2. Parquet Courts - Wide Awake

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Victor Laszlo   John Toast   Lemon  

reading: parascope.com   smokershistory.com   sibology.com   lesbianstudies.com   lightparty.com   erols.com  

Content provided by Lewdvig Tittgenstein,Sinestro. Edited by Lemon.

None of the websites we read in this episode are still online outside of archive.org, but all of them follow one basic rule: Every conspiracy theory must have been written before 50 Cent's In Da Club. In stark silence, do you hear children crying?

This week, Victor finally wins an episode.

Lemon's note: I'm still very much interested in an Artainment cassette. Contact me.

Music used:

1. Jakob Bienenhalm - LOL Internet
2. Daft Punk - One More Time

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Victor Laszlo   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: alt.fan.dragons

Content provided by Shell Game. Edited by Lemon.

----- thoughts drift by: ----- < alt.fan.dragons is over 25 years old > < indifferent to time, immortal beings reside > < saying dumb shit with weird formatting > -- TheFPlus*

Music used:

1. Morphine - Honey White
2. Cloud Nothings - Wasted Days

with: Boots Raingear   John Toast   Kumquatxop   The Intern   Adam Bozarth  

reading: reddit.com   etsy.com   clips4sale.com   melodyohair.net   crochettattoo.com   amazon.com   knitfetish.com  

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

Rather than looking at a single website, we're going on a world tour to experience SWEATER FETISH in lots of different places: Custom-knitted skintight wool catsuits, gay sweater kindle singles, people who get off on feeling itchy, people who haven't had a woman talk to them in over two decades... it's all here, and it's all very hot. But not in that way, in the other way. Whichever way you're thinking of, it's the other way.

This week, The F Plus isn't enjoyable (except for the sweater parts) if you are a straight (not gay) guy. Why do all podcast episodes have to be gay?

Music used:

1. Baxter Dury - Sleep People
2. X-Ray Specs - Oh Bondage! Up Yours!

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   The Intern   Dijon Du Jour   Lemon  

reading: fandom.com

Content provided by Smallest Sasquatch. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

The Aesthetics Wiki has devoted itself to the cataloguing of hundreds and hundreds of aesthetics and subcultures which are seemingly identical to each other. This may seem like a pointless excercise, but that's just because you're being real Grandparentcore right now, and I'm experimenting with Darkest Academia.

This week, The F Plus is trying to get your attention. BLUT BLUT BLUT BLUT!

Music used:

1. Elise Roth - Well Armed Peasants
2. Cornelius Link - Astronomia (Medieval Style)

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Sanguinary Novel   Lou Fernandez   Lemon  

reading: rainwearcentral.com   regnfrakker.dk  

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Lemon.

The people over at Rainwear Central have a fetish for rainwear. Whether it's ponchos or mackintoshes, wellingtons or sou'westers – they've got a lot of words to write, and they're all written with a British accent. Bunnybread is the only person in this episode who is able to do a British accent, but unfortunately that doesn't stop the others from trying.

This week, The F Plus is fit to tit.

Music used:

1. Dizzee Rascal - I Don't Need A Reason
2. Sleaford Mods - BHS

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Bunnybread   Frank West   J W Friedman   Lemon  

reading: tumblr.com

Content provided by Mix,Shell Game. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

For years, a Tumblr user by the name of Sylphiste was trying to turn normal brains into galaxy brains with his pontifications on conformity, pop music, feminism, hostile alien invaders, psychiatry, dragons, The Mandela Effect, and things tagged "red pill" for no good reason.

This week, The F Plus is teddity tubbily Reddited.

Side note: This episode was recorded on February 5th, 2021 - before the deaths of both DMX and Shock G (better known as Humpty Hump), and thus those jokes end up oddly timed. Shock G will be missed.

Music used:

1. Eve & Gwen Stefani - Let Me Blow Ya Mind
2. Joy Division - Warsaw

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Frank West   Portaxx   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: fandom.com

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

The Fake Countries Wikia is a place where people can catalog countries that are not real, have never been real, and have never appeared in any piece of fiction or writing before this wiki. As an excercise it's not the most fruitful, and we intended to read about a whole bunch of different countries, but pretty quickly we found our home.

This week, The F Plus meets The Alley People.

Music used:

1. Nirvana - School
2. Nirvana - Negative Creep

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Adam Bozarth   Lou Fernandez   The Intern   Ironicus   Lemon  

reading: similarworlds.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

Similar Worlds is a website where users can share their own allegedly true life experiences in a quest for acceptance, comfort and camaraderie. Naturally, this means going off on insane rants and getting really excited about being strangled by nerd thighs.

This week The F Plus sees two things, but mostly your vagina.

Music used:

1. Useless Eaters - New World Order
2. The Tokens - The Lion Sleeps Tonight (Wimoweh)

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Kumquatxop   Shell Game   Lemon  

reading: mcstories.com

Content provided by Sinestro,Lewdvig Tittgenstein. Edited by Lemon.

I don't know what you'd expect when visiting MC Stories Dot Com, but what you'll end up with is a minimalist website hosting over 12,000 stories of mind control being used for sexual reasons. Some of these stories are very long, but fortunately some are really weird, so let's dig in.

This week, The F Plus is feeling electrahorny, so let's have sex... with each other!

Music used:

1. Björk - History of Touches
2. Quincas Moreira - Black Swan
3. Kevin MacLeod - A Singular Perversion (Darkness)
4. Little Big - Hypnodancer

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Victor Laszlo   John Toast   Portaxx   Lou Fernandez   Lemon  

reading: becomealivinggod.com

Content provided by Napoleon Blownapart. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The heavily art directed magickians over at BECOME A LIVING GOD have a number of products they'd like to sell you, and about half of those are supposed to help you get laid. There's a slut water kit, PDFs that call themselves grimoires, and there will be time for poetry.

This week, The F Plus ensourcles Ally Sheedy The Character (not Ally Sheedy The Person).

SPECIAL MESSAGE FROM PORTAXX: Hello again! After this episode I entered a frozen hell and saw the face of the Lord of the Flies himself. It looked like Ü. Terrified, I had to capture the moment before making my heroic escape.

Music used:

1. Arthur Brown - Fire
2. The Flaming Lips - God Walks Among Us

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Nutshell Gulag   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: mlhh.org   theinternallonghair.wordpress.com  

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

Men love to go on the internet and compare length. In this case, it's just their hair. We're going to be surfing The Information Superhighway and logging on to The Men's Long Hair Hyperboard; a community which has been supporting long hair-having men since at least 1997. It's actually kind of charming.

This week, The F Plus wants you to call us to let us know when you're not posting.

Music used:

1. Hair Original Broadway Cast - Hair
2. Pavement - Cut Your Hair

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Kumquatxop   bumpgrrl   Victor Laszlo   Lemon  

reading: askdrfeeder.dyndns.org

Content provided by thelizzerd. Edited by Lemon.

There's an amazing array of food out there in the world today, and yet we're still struggling with the question “How can a person get fat?” But, fortunately, “Doctor” Feeder has taken it upon himself to answer that very question... Provided you're a woman with not a whole lot of clothes on.

This week, The F Plus is taking The Wall Test.

Music used:

1. MF DOOM - Hoe Cakes
2. Aaron Kenny - American Frontiers
3. Rammstein - Du Hast (Karaoke Version)
4. The Commodores - Brick House

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Frank West   Achilles' Heelies   Jimmyfranks   Adam Bozarth   K Thor Jensen   Lemon  

reading: fandom.com

Content provided by Mz. Saturn. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

Crucially, this episode is not about the television show Supernanny. It is about the Supernanny Fanon Wiki, a website with over 10,000 pages devoted to alternate universe fanfiction wherein it's the near-future, but the only cultural touchstone worth documenting is what happened in these fictional episodes of the television show Supernanny and its spinoffs.

This week, The F Plus will see you at The Creepy Zoo.

Music used:

1. Ramones - Babysitter
2. Princess Superstar - Bad Babysitter

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Jimmyfranks   Nutshell Gulag   Ironicus   Lemon  

reading: meetfighters.com

Content provided by Napoleon Blownapart. Edited by Lemon.

The website MeetFighters is a social network for men who want to inflict pain on one another. This manifests in a number of different ways, plenty of them horrifc, and at least one involving President Abraham Lincoln.

This week, The F Plus is gonna punch that dad dad.

Music used:

1. Street Sweeper Social Club - Fight! Smash! Win!
2. Viagara Boys - Ain't Nice

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Cheapskate   Sanguinary Novel   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: cantelmoism.com

Content provided by Cheapskate. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

Chris Cantelmo is no longer with us, but his teachings remain. He described himself as a Yale Biochemist who, at some point in his life, started taking DMT and had some profound revelations about God. And has it happens, most of those revelations are about DMT itself.

This week, The F Plus has a stroke.... a stroke of genius!

Music used:

1. Fred Schneider - Stroke of Genius
2. Sturgill Simpson - Turtles All The Way Down

with: Boots Raingear   John Toast   Jimmyfranks   Achilles' Heelies   Adam Bozarth   The Intern   Lemon  

reading: rootbeerreview.com

Content provided by Alqemizzy. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

You might have guessed, but Root Beer Review is a site that hosts reviews of different root beers. What you might not have inferred is that all of these reviews are (probably) written by the same person, and the other people on the website have opinions, not just on the root beer, but on the person reviewing the root beer as well.

This week, The F Plus smells terrible like vitamins and raisins.

Music used:

1. The Beach Boys - Chug-A-Lug
2. George Jones- Root Beer

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Kumquatxop   Bunnybread   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Lemon.

The people on r/LucidDreaming have figured two things out. 1: If they touch the top of their heads while they fall asleep they'll be able to control their own dreams. And 2: Real life sex is absolute garbage compared to dream sex. Sounds like some people with helpful advice.

This week, The F Plus watches out for Wife Killer Man. He killed his wife!

Music used:

1. The Cure - Caterpillar
2. Billy Ocean - Get Out Of My Dreams (Get Into My Car)

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Jack Chick   Victor Laszlo   Lemon  

reading: ayahuasca.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Bunnybread.

The website ayahuasca.com has a forum, and its 21,000 members are (as you might guess) fans of the psychoactive drug ayahuasca. Their conversations are quite profound as they understand both gravity and Antarctica.

This week, The F Plus gets namasty.

Music used:

1. Emergency Broadcast Network - Psychoactive Drugs
2. 1200 Micrograms - Acid for Nothing

Chapters provided by Bunnybread

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Victor Laszlo   Lemon  

reading: restoringforeskin.org   reddit.com  

Content provided by Mix. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

The topic of male circumcision is a contentious one, but fortunely we're able to avoid all of that by simply reading the words of dullards who are doing horrific things to their own skin while complaining about their mothers.

This week, The F Plus would like to remind you foreskin fetish does not make sense because the foreskin is part of a man's sex organ.

Music used:

1. The Contours - The Stretch
2. Red Hot Chili Peppers - Stretch You Out

with: Boots Raingear   Nutshell Gulag   Portaxx   Bunnybread   Kumquatxop   Lou Fernandez   Lemon  

reading: chakrubs.com

Content provided by Yavuz Sultan Salim. Edited by Lemon.

The capitalist innovators over at Chakrubs have a whole bunch of different crystals to sell you, and they know where you can cram it. From yoni eggs to yoni nunchucks, for spiritual healing, emotional welness, to get over a bad breakup, or just because you're bored - the answer was inside you the whole time.

This week, The F Plus is troubled to hear a click.

Music used:

1. MS MR - Salty Sweet
2. Miike Snow - My Trigger

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Frank West   Squiddy   Lemon  

reading: vacuumland.org

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Lemon.

Five lucky ridiculists from The F Plus Podcast were selected to visit the forums of VacuumLand.Org and read what they found there. You’ll be happy to know that a love of vintage vacuum cleaners totally isn’t a fetish, except for the times when it is. But they’ve got some pretty incredible vacuum collections that they bring to conventions, and also, eventually, it will be time for poetry.

This week, The F Plus will need you to hide this in your closet for our boyfriend to smell.

Music used:

1. Komeda - More Is More
2. Poetree - Mirage
3. My Life With The Thrill Kill Kult - Freaky Fever

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Bunnybread   Isfahan   Nutshell Gulag   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: bigfooteruption.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

The website Bigfoot Eruption has a whole lot of things to say about Bigfoot. Now, Few of those things make a lot of sense, and fewer still seem to be internally consistent, but the important thing is that Cain and/or Adam and/or Satan is involved, it's a conspiracy, and it's not a bear. Pay attention to your dog.

This week, The F Plus gets a lot of milage out of that poo.

Music used:

1. Jad and David Fair - Sasquatch
2. The Legend of Dogman Song

with: Jimmyfranks   Bunnybread  

Just thought we'd get to today's news after a quick rundown of our court-ordered recognizance.

with: Boots Raingear   John Toast   Kumquatxop   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Cheapskate. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The redditors over at r/NSFWworldbuilding are constructing intricate creative universes for one reason: To make themselves horny.

This week, The F Plus can say so much with ellipses; please listen.

Music used:

1. Ween - With My Own Bare Hands
2. The Supremes - My World Is Empty Without You

with: Achilles' Heelies   Frank West   Portaxx   Lemon  

reading: fembotcentral.net   clips4sale.com  

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Lemon.

The forum posters over at Fembot Central are (as you might have guessed) aroused by the idea of robotic humanoid women. And they're all too happy to explore the many facets of their specific fembot obsession, despite how often or how loudly you try to protest.

This week, The F Plus finds out what Joss Whedon has been up to.

Music used:

1. Ratatat - Neckbrace
2. Groove Armada - Sex And The City Theme
3. The Jon Spencer Blues Explosion - Blue Green Olga

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Isfahan   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: spellcaster-psychic.co.uk   srob.co.uk  

Content provided by Seashell,Chief Beef. Edited by Boots Raingear.

Occultist author S Rob is an incredibly prolific... typist. His work spans the mediums of advice books, spellbooks, instructional videos, essays, general self-aggrandizement and, of course, poetry. We can't cover everything he's written in a single episode, but we can just cover the general tone. Including reading his bio twice.

This week, The F Plus sets sail on the SS Metathree.

Correction: Boots' original reading of S Rob was at F Plus Live 5: The Finnish Incident

Additional correction: Further evidence demonstates that Open University is a legitimate educational institution. Apologies for the assumption, apparently two seconds of Wikipedia is not enough to base a conclusion on in this case.

Music used:

1. Wonderful Kids - A Kind of Magic
2. Siouxsie and the Banshees - Spellbound

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Portaxx   Kumquatxop   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: bitcointalk.org

Content provided by Shame Boi. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

Here's a simple concept: All of the material in this episode was sourced by searching BitcoinTalk for the word "female".

This week, The F Plus (like women) really is a paths duck.

Music used:

1. The Flying Lizards - Money
2. Cardi B featuring Meg Thee Stallion with Ben Shapiro - WAP [iMarkkeyz Edit]

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Jimmyfranks   Kumquatxop   Lou Fernandez   Lemon  

reading: sexstories.com

Content provided by Seth "Slimy" Rollins. Edited by Lemon.

Since 2000, Sex Stories Dot Com has been trying to serve its titular goal: Providing the people willing to look at the website with stories of sexual activity. However, that's not all the site has. There's also essays, product reviews, self-help guides, jokes, and poetry. And that's the stuff we'll be looking at.

This week, The F Plus gives you something to listen to during your 15 minute jerk break.

Music used:

1. Adina Howard - Freak Like Me
2. Esther Abrami - No 10 A New Beginning
3. Smash Mouth - I'm A Believer (Karaoke)
4. CupcakKe - Lemon Pepper

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   STOG   Victor Laszlo   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: amazon.com

Content provided by Secret Gaygent 69. Edited by Lemon.

User reviews on Amazon drive a lot of purchasing decisions, so let's have another look at the two most important categories: Cosplay accessories and erotic gay shapeshifter novels. And then when that's done, we're playing The Rites of Price.

This week, our dick plumped.

Music used:

1. Hail Mary Mallon - Whales
2. lots and lots of Price is Right production music
3. Aegukka
4. Aldous Harding - The Barrel

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Jack Chick   Kumquatxop   John Toast   Adam Bozarth  

reading: imdb.com

Content provided by Alqemizzy. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

The forums may be gone, but the stupidity still abounds on the Internet Movie Database. Good reviews of garbage movies, bad reviews of good movies, and generally creepy undertones to everything. There's more blood, boobs, and beasts than a document from National Geography.

This week, The F Plus' pokery is undoubtedly jiggery.

Music used:

1. Keith Mansfield - Funky Fanfare
2. Violent Femmes - Hollywood Is High

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: Boots Raingear   Isfahan   Bunnybread   Portaxx   Frank West   Lemon  

reading: Patreon.com   fapp.pbworks.com   balls.horse  

Content provided by The Lesbiathan,Heavenator. Edited by Lemon.

Fapp is a furry erotic tabletop roleplaying game. Now, credit where it's due, they own the domain balls dot horse, which is a fantastic name. However, as you're about to find out, everything they enjoy is profoundly disgusting.

This week, The F Plus requests a court-ordered explungement.

Music used:

1. Viagara Boys - Down In The Basement
2. Reggie Watts - Fuck Shit Stack

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Nutshell Gulag   Jimmyfranks   John Toast   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Sovereign,Wrought. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

This time around, we're not just going to one subreddit, but five different subreddits, all of which are almost identical, and all of which ask the question "What if my preposterous hypothetical was real, would you upvote me then?" And also Satan really wants to watch you suck off ya boy.

This week, The F Plus is real, you family member?

Music used:

1. King Missle - What If
2. Moloko - Where Is The What If The What Is The Why

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Achilles' Heelies   Nutshell Gulag   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by R.S. Benedict. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

The redditors at r/ZeroCarb have a particular diet they want to share with you, and here it is: Meat. Meat at the exclusion of literally everything else. Every other comestible on the planet contains toxins, so they've found perfect health. Also they're all getting hives and incontinence and a myriad of sexual, respiratory and sleep problems, but that's probably entirely unrelated.

This week, we don't mention Jordan Peterson too much, so that's nice.

Music used:

1. FEAR - Waiting for the Meat
2. Reverend Horton Heat - Eat Steak

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Jack Chick   Achilles' Heelies   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: bulletproof.com

Content provided by A Meat. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The folks over at Bulletproof tried selling coffee with butter in it. And not only did that plan work, but their customers were willing to pay a premium for the experience. So with that lesson learned they expanded the product line: Protein bars, tinctures, vibrating platforms, books, computers with pre-installed software. These are products designed to reverse the aging process. And if that sales pitch sounds compelling to you, please give me your credit card information.

This week, The F Plus puts the coconut in the fire to relieve this bellyache.

Music used:

1. La Roux - Bulletproof
2. Modest Mussorgsky - Night On Bald Mountain
3. The Floozies - Like Butter

with: Boots Raingear   Nutshell Gulag   Victor Laszlo   Achilles' Heelies   Sanguinary Novel   Lemon  

reading: fandom.com

Content provided by Spooks. Edited by Lemon.

The Psi Wiki is an encylcopedia devoted to the art of pisonics, which takes great pains to make sure that all the information is completely accurate. So with that said, let's learn how to time travel.

This week, Venmo @TheFPlus and we'll tell you what your Radionic Box does.

Music used:

1. Self - Miracleworker
2. Valium & The Tripmunks - You Keep Me Hangin' On

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Frank West   Squiddy   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Mix. Edited by Lemon.

The Redditors on r/BadRoommates are frustrated by their roommates. Why? Well, they'd like to tell you, but that would require a familiarization with the English language far greater than any of them are capable. But the roommates have been warned!

This week, The F Plus has a Sour Daddy.

Music used:

1. Possum Dixon - Emergency's About To End
2. Mojo Nixon & Skid Roper - Ain't Gonna Wash Dishes No More

with: Boots Raingear   Jack Chick   Isfahan   Adam Bozarth   JW Friedman   Lemon  

reading: answers.yahoo.com

Content provided by SinBucket. Edited by Lemon.

Sourced from all over the internet, we're singing songs of praise and worship (25 of them to be exact) and we expect you to feel our love deep inside you, except not in a sex way this time.

This week, The F Plus begins The Upward Spiral.

Music used:

1. Portugal. The Man - Modern Jesus
2. Marilyn Manson - The Fight Song
3. Stryper - To Hell With The Devil
4. Zekka - Kill A Rainbow

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Jimmyfranks   Victor Laszlo   Achilles' Heelies   Lemon  

reading: clips4sale.com

Content provided by Mix. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

Hey, this is a gross one! We started reading a Clips 4 Sale document, and then very quickly realized was all about food. We've got recipes, we've got cooking tips, we've got women upside down with their head in a laundry basket, really - all your staples. It's very disgusting, but also fun. And Jimmyfranks bought a whistle.

This week, The F Plus can't seem to sell any of this Cookie Puss!

Music used:

1. Lil Debbie - Bake A Cake
2. The Avalanches ft. Biz Markie & Jean-Michel Bernard - The Noisy Eater

with: Boots Raingear   Nutshell Gulag   Portaxx   Kumquatxop   Lemon  

reading: ChemtrailsAreDemonic.org

Content provided by JOA. Edited by Lemon.

The uncredited former owner of ChemtrailsAreDemonic.org has a very straightforward message to explain to you, but if you think the URL will explain it all, you're going to be surprised on pretty much every turn here.

This week, The F Plus gets super efficient at releasing our sperm whales.

SPECIAL MESSAGE FROM PORTAXX: Hi! Shortly after recording this episode, I made the mistake of going outside and was sprayed by demonic chemtrails. When I came to, I realized I painted this adorable demonplane while in a possessed frenzy.

Music used:

1. Slayer vs Katrina & The Waves - Chemical Warfare (Don't It Feel Good) [by Bill McClintock]
2. Milli Vanilli - Baby Don't Forget My Number

with: Achilles' Heelies   Adam Bozarth   John Toast   STOG   Portaxx   The Intern   Boots Raingear  

reading: eattolivenottodie.com

Content provided by Tipsy Almond. Edited by Boots Raingear.

Alfredo Bowman (aka Dr. Sebi) made an interesting discovery about germ theory: Namely, that there is only one germ, which causes a disease called "disease", which causes mucus, which in turn causes disease. And germs. Also beets cause perpetual motion. It's all very sensible, so please buy this £40 tea.

This week, The F Plus is giving up the moisture.

Music used:

1. The Dead Milkmen - Bleach Boys
2. Against Me! - Piss and Vinegar

with: Achilles' Heelies   Frank West   Boots Raingear   Victor Laszlo  

On January 18th of 2020, The F Plus came to Portland in order to do something very stupid indeed. Sixteen players would come up to the stage, one by one, and read randomly selected content they have never seen before, in order to prove who is the motherfucking best.

• Achilles' Heelies - From Nightmares & Rockets (an Elon Musk fanfic) by Tesla Pike
• Frank West - How To Shave Your Genitals (Male)
• Boots Raingear - How To Get Over Your Fear Of Slenderman
• Victor Laszlo - How To Ignore Your Husband

I'm sorry, Dad.

Heat 2 | Heat 3 | Heat 4 | Final Heat

Music used:

1. Boots Raingear - wikiHow The Game Show Theme
2. Boots Raingear wikiHow The Game Show Vote Music

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: Lou Fernandez   Jack Chick   Lemon   Kumquatxop  

• King Lou Fernandez - How to Survive a Freestyle Rap Battle
• Jack Chick - How to Become Pope
• Lemon - How to Report Illegal Immigrants
• Kumquatxop - B.A.B.E.S. (Bay Area Bug Eating Society)

Don't walk on the table, Jack.

Heat 1 | Heat 3 | Heat 4 | Final Heat

Music used:

1. Boots Raingear - wikiHow The Game Show Vote Music

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: Nutshell Gulag   Adam Bozarth   K Thor Jensen   Shell Game  

• Nutshell Gulag - How to Get Rid of Demons
• Adam Bozarth - How to Turn the Super Bowl into Super Sex!
• K. Thor Jensen - How to Pretend to Have Ice Powers (for Girls)
• Shell Game - How to Escape a Minefield

K. Thor drank his own piss.

Heat 1 | Heat 2 | Heat 4 | Final Heat

Music used:

1. Boots Raingear - wikiHow The Game Show Vote Music

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: bumpgrrl   Jimmyfranks   Bunnybread   STOG  

• bumpgrrl - r/creepybossta
• Jimmyfranks - How to Fake Your Own Death
• Bunnybread - How to Throw a LEGO-themed Party (for Adults)
• STOG - How to Vomit While Driving

Hands above the waist, Bunnybread.

Heat 1 | Heat 2 | Heat 3 | Final Heat

Music used:

1. Boots Raingear - wikiHow The Game Show Vote Music

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: Achilles' Heelies   Kumquatxop   Shell Game   Jimmyfranks  

• Achilles Heelies - Daniel Songer's Comedy Act #191
• Kumquatxop - How to Win a Swordfight
• Shell Game - How to Live in a Dungeon
• Jimmyfranks - How to Cook Lasagna in the Dishwasher

That's the end. Now that you're at the end, you should probably go to motherfucking.best and vote for your favorite readings.

Heat 1 | Heat 2 | Heat 3 | Heat 4

Music used:

1. Lizzo - Boys
2. Boots Raingear - wikiHow The Game Show Vote Music

Chapters provided by Adam Bozarth

with: Achilles' Heelies   Adam Bozarth   Frank West   Lemon   Boots Raingear  

reading: starwars.fandom.com

Content provided by King Kalamari. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

The volunteer researchers over at The Wookieepedia have quite a job in front of them: They must catalog absolutely everything that has ever existed in the Star Wars Universe, including (but not limited to) the things that Disney has labeled as canon.

This week The F Plus has learned one thing about Twi'lek dancers, and it's wrong.

Music used:

1. Meco - "Star Wars" Theme
2. Max Rebo Band - Lapti Nek

with: Jimmyfranks   Jack Chick   Kumquatxop   J W Friedman   Lemon  

reading: sticky-site.com   deviantart.com  

Content provided by Mr. Hunky Academia,Girlkisser. Edited by Lemon.

The Wiki Sticky Site may no longer be with us, but the fetish it catalogued remains with us on the internet. The people who describe themselves as "Stuck In Glue Fetishists" have a specific turn-on that you might have guessed, but it is crucially important that they describe what specific kind of glue is being used in all cases, because this is not a place for fantasy.

This week, The F Plus is still stuck in the window.

Music used:

1. Ludacris - Saturday (Ooh Ooh!)
2. White Lung - Glue

with: Isfahan   Frank West   Nutshell Gulag   Zarla   Lou Fernandez   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Wrought. Edited by Lemon.

The frequent posters over at r/WhoWouldWin are looking for hard scientific evidence of what would happen if Popeye got into a knife fight with Johnny Bravo but also if being in a high altitude environment would change the outcome. It's a dumb thing to think about, and therefore there are several hundred thousand words on the subject.

This week, The F Plus is horrified to discover that Garfield has killed at least one man.

Music used:

1. IDLES - Never Fight A Man With A Perm
2. McLusky - To Hell With Good Intentions

with: Boots Raingear   Adam Bozarth   Portaxx   Cheapskate   Lemon  

reading: fetlife.com

Content provided by Montrith. Edited by Boots Raingear.

Over six years ago, Montrith gave us a Fetlife document. So thanks, Montrith.

This week, The F Plus is really into Snugglefuxxx.

Music used:

1. Rheostatics - Here Come The Wolves
2. Britney Spears - I'm A Slave 4 U

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Frank West   Jack Chick   Nutshell Gulag   Lemon  

reading: newart.com

Content provided by Cat Examiner. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

From the title alone, you may have some incorrect guesses at what's kept the community over at Newart.com thriving since 1996, but quickly you'll learn (as we did) that they're bound by a singular focus of pumping, inflating, and injecting their junk. And then they post pictures. Oh christ, we've seen the pictures. We see them when we close our eyes.

This week, The F Plus achieves The Engored Look.

Music used:

1. 20 Fingers ft. Gilette - Short Dick Man
2. The Pixies - Gigantic

with: Adam Bozarth   Achilles' Heelies   John Toast   Portaxx   Frank West   Squiddy   Boots Raingear   Bunnybread   Lemon   STOG   Nutshell Gulag   Victor Laszlo  

reading: wikihow.com

Content provided by Neal. Edited by Lemon.

At The F Plus' Suicide Banquet, we're serving the following...

1. Adam Bozarth: Roasted Lettuce, Radicchio, and Endive
2. Achilles' Heelies: Noodle and Coffee Casserole
3. John Toast: Tofu French Toast
4. Portaxx: Mashed Potato Ghosts (video)
5. Frank West: Gamer Sandwiches
6. Squiddy: Amaretto Sour Cherry Popsicles
7. Boots Raingear: Fenelon Poutine
8. Bunnybread: Boob Cake
9. Lemon: Raw Vegan Tom Kha Soup
10. STOG: Parsnip Pancakes
11. Nutshell Gulag: Tuna, Lemon Gelatin, and Pimento Pie
12. Victor Laszlo: Creamy Coconut Spirulina Superfood Smoothie

View Photos

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Music used:

1. Galt MacDermot - Coffee Cold
2. Onra - Still Broke
3. Jackie Mittoo & the Skatalites - El Bang Bang
4. Bonobo - Silver

Chapters provided by Lemon

with: Boots Raingear   Achilles' Heelies   Kumquatxop   Squiddy   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Cheapskate. Edited by Lemon.

The Redditors on r/NEET self describe as "Not in Education, Employment or Training", and yes that may be a very clumsy acronym, but what they're trying to tell is that they don't work, or go to school, or even do anything like chores. This makes some of them feel special and some of them feel sad, but if they feel sad it's just the fault of women.

This week, we start writing some magical realist self help fiction.

Music used:

1. Brad Sucks - Dirtbag
2. The Damned - Neat Neat Neat

with: Boots Raingear   John Toast   Bunnybread   Kumquatxop   Victor Laszlo   Lemon  

reading: bluelight.org

Content provided by Mix. Edited by Lemon.

While bluelight.org is not the only drugs forum on the internet, it has had about two decades to collect nearly half a million users, many of whom are very excited to share their experiences of the things they've done, thought, and said while on drugs. And most of those things are about trance albums, apparently.

This week: Dilute, dilute, dilute! OK, OK, OK?

Music used:

1. Butthole Surfers - Goofy's Concern
2. Jefferson Airplane - White Rabbit

with: Jack Chick   Frank West   Achilles' Heelies   Adam Bozarth   Lemon  

reading: coiledfist.org

Content provided by Girlkisser,The Smoking Dad. Edited by Adam Bozarth.

The people who frequent the unpleasantly named Coiled Fist are gay men with a specific predilection; Either they want much bigger men to be sexually rude to them, or they want to be sexually rude to much smaller men. Oh, also they hate shaving their balls. It's so time consuming!

This week, we started out climbing the rope but now we're all into feet.

Music used:

1. Sparks - Eaten By The Monster of Love
2. The Kinks - Big Sky

with: Isfahan   Nutshell Gulag   Achilles' Heelies   Zarla   Boots Raingear  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Seth "Slimy" Rollins. Edited by Lemon.

r/nosleep describes itself as "a subreddit for realistic horror stories." Well, realism is a hard thing to define, and while the stories that live here are mostly poorly spelled rambling essays that strain credulity, they also cause Boots Raingear's internet to drop out for a while! 😱

This week, The F Plus is waterboarding clowns correctly, for once.

Music used:

1. Beastie Boys - No Sleep Til Brooklyn
2. This Heat - Sleep

with: STOG   Squiddy   Jack Chick   Lemon  

reading: isitnormal.com

Content provided by Wrought. Edited by Lemon.

Originally launched in 2005, Is It Normal? is a website where people can describe their own peculiarities, and the rest of the internet can weigh in on if that is "normal" or not. For our second trip to the site, we're looking specifically at the food-related questions that people have asked the site, and learning very little in the process.

This week, The F Plus is in solidarity with that Chili's waiter.

Music used:

1. Wire - Strange
2. Screaming Females - Glass House

with: Lemon   John Toast   Kumquatxop   Zarla   Boots Raingear  

reading: ulule.com

Content provided by Boots Raingear. Edited by Boots Raingear.

Ulele is a crowdfunding site for self-described makers to get money for projects they may or may not actually follow through with. How does this differ from the several dozen other websites who are doing that exact same thing? Well, first of all Ulule is French. Secondly, shut up. We've got a $300 VPN box and a jockstrap for your straw boater.

This week, Boots got a new pillow.

Music used:

1. Yelle - Je Veux Te Voir
2. Nouvelle Vague - Come On Eileen

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Nutshell Gulag   bumpgrrl   Lemon  

reading: tumblr.com   deviantart.com   amazon.com  

Content provided by Mix. Edited by Lemon.

Cardiophiles are motivated by two things: An intense fetish for the functions of the human heart, and the desire to tell the entire internet that they have a fetish for the functions of the human heart.

This week, The F Plus wants to sleep on the left side of the bed.

Music used:

1. Psychedelic Furs - Heartbeat
2. John Deley and the 41 Players - Ersatz Bossa
3. Ted Leo & The Pharmacists - Heart Problems

with: Jimmyfranks   Frank West   Portaxx   Achilles' Heelies   Lemon  

reading: isoaker.com   isoaker.net  

Content provided by Cat Examiner. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

There aren't a whole lot of people who visit the iSoaker family of websites, but you can't deny the passion they have in their hobby. This is an episode of meticulously documenting all the squirt guns to have ever existed, of the life-changing obsession of being super into squirt guns, and about the super cool bad ass things these full grown adults do when they're holding a squirt gun and dressed in a ninja outfit.

This week, The F Plus can't decide which soaker for bear.

Music used:

1. Andrew WK - I Get Wet
2. Lil Debbie (ft. RiFF RAFF) - SQUiRT

with: Boots Raingear   John Toast   Kumquatxop   Nutshell Gulag   Zarla   Lemon  

reading: ashtarcommandcrew.net

Content provided by Mr. Hunky Academia. Edited by Lemon.

The Ashtar Command Crew is a global organization on a mission of.... peace, maybe? It's difficult to say. We're not even sure who's on the crew. Okay, we know three things: Ashtar is love, The Paa-Tal are old, and the tall greys are taller than the short greys. Beyond that, it's open to interpretation, which is difficult when some of these beings are in the twelfth dimension.

This week, The F Plus is best, the F Plus is blest.

Music used:

1. The Asteroid Galaxy Tour - Suburban Space Invader
2. Moloko - The Only Ones

Call your lawyers, The Garbage Day Records are online. On May 18th of 2019, The F Plus set out to record live for 24 hours straight to raise money for the National Network of Abortion Funds. Missed the live event? We won’t judge you. Visit thefpl.us to catch up on all 24 hours. Theme songs, objectivists, conspiracy theorists, garlicky vaginas, that **** Dave who can’t even **** flip, it’s all been recorded and online, alongside 12 terrific artists trying to draw something to make sense of it all. Stream the hours at your leisure and donate to the charities directly. Because this all seemed like a good idea at the time.

Just when you thought it was safe to take out the trash, The F Plus is diving back into the dumpster for Another 24 Terrible Hours. On Saturday, May 18th, gird your loins and stock up on stimulants. It's time for Garbage Day 2019: Another 24 Terrible Hours. A benefit to raise money for the Southern Poverty Law Center. The F Plus will be blowing out our backlog of topics with all your favorite ridiculists. And artists will be creating visual representations for a unique and singular entertainment experience. This 24 Hour Extravaganza will be streamed live on twitch.tv. Get all the details at thefpl.us

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Jack Chick   Portaxx   Lemon  

reading: homemade-sex-toys.com   dollforum.com   answers.yahoo.com  

Content provided by Cat Examiner. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

For well over a decade, John James has been committed to a single mission: Disrupting the economics of the global sex industry by innovationg solutions of upcycled aftermarket parts. By that, I mean that John James makes things for him to put his dick inside of and then recommends that you do the same. It's a very squishy episode, and also there's drawings.

This week, The F Plus adds bumps to our brainy zildo.

Music used:

1. The Beach Boys-Vegetables
2. The Melvins-Toy

Chapters provided by birdie

with: Bunnybread   Boots Raingear   Frank West   Achilles' Heelies   Jack Chick   Squiddy   Lemon  

reading: reddit.com

Content provided by Ambious,Cheapskate. Edited by Achilles' Heelies.

People need a moral arbiter in their lives, and while that's understandable, it's an odd move to trust Reddit to do it for you. And yet, r/AmITheAsshole is there, and it's handling hundreds of conflicts a day.

This week, The F Plus gets disgusted by an ugly 8.

Music used:

1. Sara Bareilles - Sweet As Whole
2. Nina Simone - Nobody's Fault but Mine (Remastered)

Chapters provided by birdie

with: Boots Raingear   Jimmyfranks   Frank West   Achilles' Heelies   Lemon  

reading: fantasyfeeder.com

Content provided by Amelia Blank. Edited by Jimmyfranks.

A previous subject from nearly a decade ago, the website of Fantasy Feeder is still committed to its cause: Encouraging people to overeat to an absurd degree so that other people can get boners.

This week, Zboatzboat!

Music used:

1. Georgia Gibbs - If I Knew You Were Coming I'd Have Baked A Cake
2. Big Pun - Still Not A Player

Chapters provided by ikaribattousai

with: Kumquatxop  

This week, episode.

with: STOG   Isfahan   Jimmyfranks   Portaxx   Lemon  

reading: morgan-blayde.com   amazon.com  

Content provided by Cheapskate. Edited by Lemon.

With a couple dozen books in the Kindle store at about 300 pages apiece, Morgan Blayde's contributions to the urban fantasy genre could best be described as "relentless". His protagonist has a magical tattoo that helps him straight up murder a hundred guys in hand to hand combat, and I don't need to tell you that the female characters in his books like that very much indeed.

Because sometimes you have to fight fire with hellfire, there’s episode 299 of The F Plus: Raised as a demon, armed like a gun merchant, and fueled by booze. Poorly constructed sentences are in this episode and this is that what this episode then does best.

Music used:

1. Pantera - By Demons Be Driven
2. Joey Bada$$ - Rockabye Baby

Chapters provided by ikaribattousai

with: Boots Raingear   Frank West   Nutshell Gulag   Bunnybread   Lemon  

reading: experienceproject.com   reddit.com   asmr.fm  

Content provided by LINDA. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The topic of ASMR first caught a number of peoples' attention as a very strange looking and suddenly popular YouTube goldrush. The idea of whispering, crinkling, and providing a number of close wet sounds is very much tied into the happiness of a certain demographic who we're honestly a little concerned about.

This week, The F Plus contemplates the opposite of nails on a chalkboard.

Music used:

1. The Cure - Close To Me
2. Madonna - Justify My Love

Chapters provided by ikaribattousai

with: Kumquatxop   Nutshell Gulag   Boots Raingear   Jack Chick   John Toast   Lemon  

reading: stopabductions.com   aliensandchildren.com  

Content provided by Cheapskate. Edited by Lemon.

While technical writer Michael Menkin may not be an accredited scientist, he is a man of science. One scientific field interests him in particular, and that's the field of sewing plastic bags to the insides of a leather aviator softcap in order to prevent thought-rays from hostile aliens who want to give you autism. It's a specialized field, but he's written a lot of papers on the subject.

This week, The F Plus has been manipulated by the greys to find this funny, but please do not be fooled.

Music used:

1. Morcheeba - Big Calm
2. Joe Cocker - You Can Leave Your Hat On

Chapters provided by ikaribattousai

with: Boots Raingear   Isfahan   Nutshell Gulag   Achilles' Heelies   Lemon   Tommy  

reading: budk.com

Content provided by Cat Examiner. Edited by Boots Raingear.

The world can be a scary place, and that's why the folks at BUDK Worldwide are there, day after day, to use that fear as a tool to sell cheap worthless crap to rubes with self esteem problems. We're here for the swords, but there's a lot of categories on offer here and it's easy to get distracted.

This week, The F Plus opens the box and BAM THE FREAKING BANKAI SWORD OF ICHIGOS

Music used:

1. The Jesus Lizard - The Art of Self-Defense
2. Twisted Sister - Under The Blade

Chapters provided by ikaribattousai