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Will I ever know it if I have a healthy relationship? I’m finally out of a toxic relationship, again, after a repeated cycle. I think my picker is broken. I’ll never date again. It isn’t worth the risk.

Is there a difference between love bombing and the initial excitement of a new relationship anyways? How would I ever know the difference? What does healthy actually look like?

These are some of the questions that I get asked repeatedly. I am four years post divorce. Never yet been on a date, and not sure if I ever will. Probably, someday. Maybe, maybe not.

I do know this though, I am far healthier than I was the day I left. I am way more in touch with who I am and listening to my heart in a way that I never had before.

Could I ever get duped again? Yes. I do believe that could still happen. Covert narcissists are extremely good at what they do. They manipulate, deceive, take advantage of, and absolutely drain their victims. And me? I’m still a giving, self-sacrificing person. Believing in the good of others, willing to give the benefit of the doubt. So could I get duped again? Yes, I could.

So how do we protect ourselves? How do we keep from being deceived again? Let’s start with learning what healthy even looks like in the first place.