Welcome to this episode of Best Friend Therapy, where we chat about what's on our minds, to get deeper in our minds.TW: miscarriageThis week we're talking about shoulds and oughts and why we feel compelled to live our lives by some pretty tough rules at times. Elizabeth shares times in her life when structure has helped her to feel in control and Emma explains why criticism can sometimes be tough to take. Correction: Emma did not know that Tetrapak cartons were now widely recyclable. She *should* know better.---Emma refers to personality adaptations in this episode (as distinct from disorders) and you can read more about obsessive-compulsive and passive-aggressive processes in the book 'Personality Adaptations', by Vann Joines and Iain Stewart, available from all good booksellers or at https://www.amazon.co.uk/Personality-Adaptations-Understanding-Psychotherapy-Counselling/dp/187024401X Claude Steiner's book, 'Scripts People Live', offers great insights into the behavioural templates we lay down in early life. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Scripts-People-Live-Transactional-Analysis/dp/0802132103/ref=sr_1_1?adgrpid=51732384845&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIlZWvoZXz9gIVycLtCh08vgU7EAAYAiAAEgKtePD_BwE&hvadid=259059343144&hvdev=c&hvlocphy=9045896&hvnetw=g&hvqmt=e&hvrand=17815643095787796303&hvtargid=kwd-299710077529&hydadcr=24405_1748889&keywords=scripts+people+live&qid=1648826478&sr=8-1Emma quotes Eric Berne's work on ego states and the Parent-Adult-Child model. You can find out more at https://ericberne.com.---Best Friend Therapy is hosted by Elizabeth Day and Emma Reed Turrell, produced by Chris Sharp. To contact us, email contact@bestfriendtherapy.co.uk---Social Media:Elizabeth Day @elizabdayEmma Reed Turrell @emmareedturrellBest Friend Therapy @best.friend.therapy