This week we discuss the Heidi Klum Seal breakup, Obama's State of the Union Address, porn actors being made to wear condoms, Gabrielle Giffords retiring, Gingrich taking the lead thanks to his wanting an open marriage, Gleib in Men's Health magazine, Paula Deen getting diabetes after telling us all to eat bacon donut burgers, If Russell Brand is writing a tell-all book about Katy Perry, Taylor Swift's new "romance", Perry dropping out, Chuck Norris, SOPA and PIPA being postponed, the d!ckhead Italian cruise ship captain, Gleib's "Don't be a d!ck" pledge, Kim Kardashian's pregnancy knowledge, a woman with 2 vaginas, Mitt Romney releasing his taxes, Mormonism's Magic Underwear, the crackdown in Syria, if pork cures nosebleeds, North Korea, Burger King bringing it to you, scientists making the bird flu more dangerous, monitoring fat kids, dying bats, if Cougars offend high school kids, and Earth under attack! Plus, THE THUNDER ROUND.