On today’s episode of Hear Me Out… what? Oh my god, who told you? Adoption is a complicated thing. Raising a child who’s not related to you is challenging — and being that child, in many ways, is even harder.  And it’s all too easy for adoption, particularly a white family adopting a black or brown child, to be framed as a heroic act. The truth, as adoptees will tell you, is a lot messier. Angela Tucker, a writer and transracial adoptee, joins us to argue that adoption is traumatic… and with the right reforms, it shouldn’t need to happen as often as it does. If you have thoughts you want to share, or an idea for a topic we should tackle, you can email the show: hearmeout@slate.com Podcast production by Maura Currie You can skip all the ads in Hear Me Out by joining Slate Plus. Sign up now at slate.com/hearmeoutplus for just $15 a month for your first three months. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices