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Submit ReviewGoing through different stages of life and relationships is never easy. It’s easy to break down, fall apart or become numb and completely lose yourself along the way. Lisa Bilyeu has experience with navigating change and transitioning from a traditional supportive housewife to being the badass CEO and Co-founder of Impact Theory she now is. In this episode, Lisa and Tom reflect and share the lessons they’ve stumbled through along the way over the last 19 years of marriage to support Lisa’s awakening.
Join them as they deep dive into how to get beyond the surface level arguments, discover the value of your frame of reference, and what it truly means to evolve together to be supportive. The trip is bumpy, a little messy, not as graceful as you may imagine or believe, but the way they are honest and committed to each other makes it successful and worthwhile every time.
Check Out Relationship Theory for solid relationship advice at every stage: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtHuUTWVRHUXVjmRrvS8WYg
SHOW NOTES:
0:00 | Introduction Lisa Bilyeu
2:36 | Why Love Isn’t Enough
3:24 | The Gap Between Love & Divorce
4:43 | Change Impacting Relationships
6:03 | Not Understanding Each Other
7:16 | Surface Level Arguments
10:15 | Find the Frame of Reference
16:46 | Preparing for Disruptive Changes
22:04 | Self Soothing Through Change
23:06 | Embracing Change Together
30:42 | Evolving Plans Call for Change
31:58 | When Personality Changes
39:02 | Making The Transitions Work
42:02 | Pivot from CEO To Cuddly Wife
45:23 | What You Need vs. Want
48:35 | Power In Being Needed
52:18 | Why You Have To Communicate
57:18 | Emphasis of Feelings
1:01:28 | Own Your Triggers & Insecurities
QUOTES:
“The problem with emotions, they make things seem self evidently correct.” Tom Bilyeu [6:40]
“If someone who loves you, and that you love are going that head to head, you don't perceive the situation the same. Therefore, the entire argument should stop instantly, and you should simply say, where's the misperception?” Tom Bilyeu [10:26]
“If you want someone to be there when you're weak, you have to be honest about where you're weak.” Lisa Bilyeu [18:02]
“So the goal was for me to change my life to break out of the mundane.” Lisa Bilyeu [19:35]
“I had to be very aware, and really respectful to the fact that my change is going to impact you.” Lisa Bilyeu [24:16]
“We had the goal, we had the strategy, and in that strategy, I got lost, I lost myself.” Lisa Bilyeu [31:30]
“So as you're going through that transition, the thing for me to fall back on was, I'm in this forever. So now I'm only looking for ways to make it work. I'm not looking for the exit ramp.” Tom Bilyeu [39:02]
“I want you to become whoever you want to become in order to be proud, and I want you to feel that you've become as powerful as you want to become.” Tom Bilyeu [40:31]
“As your business partner, I owe it to you to not be weak, and I owe it to you to stand my ground if I believe in something and you owe it to me to stand your ground.” Lisa Bilyeu [42:23]
“I would never be able to stay with a wife who didn't know how to make me feel powerful… it feels so good… If you're with a man that doesn't know how to make you feel beautiful, you're missing a trick.” Tom Bilyeu [45:23]
Follow Lisa Bilyeu:
Website: https://www.lisabilyeu.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeir7Wbzzfg43c1eL7PSa3g
There are dozens of reasons why dating nowadays is so hard for men and women. While lack of communication seems to be a significant factor, being able to read the people you date is also part of the equation.
Is he asking you out just because he’s interested in sex?
He booked reservations at a high-end restaurant you’ve been wanting to go to, does this mean he’s serious about you?
You’re having a great time together, what will he think if you decide to sleep with him on the first date?
Being able to spot red flags is great, but it helps very little without you being brave enough to address it, ask questions and assess his behavior also.
Stephan Speaks, one of YouTube’s favorite relationship experts has a straightforward approach and way of helping women (and men) understand and see the challenges everyone is facing. Dating is complicated and there’s a lot of unhelpful advice being shared with both sexes.
This episode is going to help you spot the red flags if he’s only in it for the sex, learn how to better interpret his actions, determine if he’s toxic or just not the guy for you, and figure out how to solve the dating problems keeping you single.
QUOTES:
“The guy that just wants to have sex is trying to get the most for the least effort.”
“I believe that real love, real connection happens extremely fast if not instant.”
“Him chasing you is not always the greatest indicator that he’s serious about you, or that he has genuine interests.”
“It can’t not be true love on my end but true love on your end, it doesn’t work that way, [...] true love requires a flow back and forth.”
“Every woman who dates from now on should give that man permission to be blatantly, brutally honest because it will save her the headache of confusion and his fear of how she’ll receive it.”
“It’s not about what the person does, it's about how they handle your feelings about it.”
“A lot of situations are just symptoms that they’re with the wrong person.”
“Red flags are not see it, run. Red flags are see it, address it, and if it’s not corrected walk away.”
“You either want to be heard or you want to be received.”
“When there is connection, there will be chemistry.”
Follow Stephan Speaks:
Website: https://www.stephanspeaks.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPBO9gLGy8ujsJ7xjARI7ow
Twitter: https://twitter.com/StephanSpeaks
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stephanspeaks/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/StephanSpeaksRelationships/
Download For FREE: The Most Important Questions You MUST Ask Your Partner here! - https://bit.ly/3dWyB2d
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
Sponsors:
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
Post your job for free at http://www.linkedin.com/Lisa. Terms and conditions apply.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at http://www.betterhelp.com/womenofimpact and make sure to check out our exclusive series for Mental Health Awareness month, only on Spotify.
On this very personal episode of Heath Theory, Tom Bilyeu interviews the co-founder of Impact Theory (and his wife), Lisa Bilyeu. For years Lisa has suffered from catastrophic dysbiosis, and her battle with illness is actually the inspiration for Health Theory.
Now that her health is manageable, she is sharing the most important lessons she has learned.
In this episode, she explains why she needed to take total ownership of her health, how she dealt with shame and fear, why she has learned to use controlled experiments, and why it is so important to challenge accepted beliefs on health.
SHOW NOTES:
Lisa and Tom discuss how and when her health issues began [1:37]
Lisa shares her story of how her eating problems developed [3:31]
Lisa explains the emotional distress and shame behind her sickness [6:22]
Lisa talks about the fear of appearing weak that accompanied her chronic illness [9:51]
Lisa explains how she got over the desire to hide her illness [12:46]
Lisa and Tom discuss the first few times they sought help [15:56]
Lisa and Tom talk about how important it was for her to take ownership [23:32]
Lisa explains why taking ownership allowed her to figure out how to heal herself [26:43]
Tom and Lisa talk about how different people have wildly different triggers [33:01]
Lisa discusses what she is going to try to do next [37:17]
Lisa and Tom talk about trying the carnivore diet and other experiments [40:01]
Lisa and Tom talk about never quitting [47:04]
Follow Lisa Bilyeu:
Website: https://www.radicalconfidence.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/
Twitter:https://twitter.com/lisabilyeu
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisabilyeu
Sponsors:
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
Post your job for free at http://www.linkedin.com/Lisa. Terms and conditions apply.
This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at http://www.betterhelp.com/womenofimpact and make sure to check out our exclusive series for Mental Health Awareness month, only on Spotify.
Relationships can be really fun and exciting, and they can also get a bit messy, awkward and questionable. Even after investing years of your life.
Pop quiz for the ladies still searching for the right relationship and for the ones questioning the relationship they’re in now, and you have to be totally honest.
Have you chosen the wrong relationship because it beat the idea of being alone? At least you weren’t the single friend, or the one that walked away first.
Can you think of someone you dated that clearly only happened because you lowered your standards enough?
Has the thought of starting over and walking away from a relationship that obviously had no future kept you in an unhealthy, unhappy, and unfulfilling relationship way past the expiration date?
If you answered yes to any of these questions and smirked thinking about your friend, sister, or cousin that would be a HELL YEAH to one or more of these questions, then you’re in for a treat. Today’s guest, Case Kenny, is one of the most influential voices of reason for millennials, an internet entrepreneur and the host of the podcast, New Mindset, Who Dis?
Case is talking with Lisa and shares why being alone isn’t just 1000% better than settling for the wrong person, it’s freaking dangerous! Irrational fear of being alone and the stigma that comes with it jeopardizes you being your happiest most vibrant self.
Check out Case Kenny’sBook: That’s Bold of You: https://www.amazon.com/Thats-Bold-You-Thrive-Vibrant-ebook/dp/B0BRHYQTZK?ref_=ast_author_dp
QUOTES:
“I don’t think you’re ever too picky because you have the experience, it’s not just theory for you.”
“Starting over doesn’t mean you’re getting farther away from what you deserve, it means you’re getting closer, logically.”
“Speaking to what you need is the most romantic thing ever.”
“The right relationship gives us the opposite of settling down, with that person it gives you more life and more of everything.”
“The right partner makes you more independent.”
“A big problem is we date in potential and we don’t date in reality.”
“I think love is always worth the chance, is worth the risk, if we are willing to wipe the slate clean. finding a way to wipe the slate clean, finding a way to say this person hurt me, but not all people are like that.”
“Life changes for the better when we prioritize how our life feels to us instead of how it looks to other people.”
Follow Case Kenny:
Website: https://newmindsetwhodis.com/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/thecasekenny
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/thecasekenny/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/case.kenny/
Download For FREE: The Most Important Questions You MUST Ask Your Partner here! - https://bit.ly/3dWyB2d
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
On this episode of Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu, we explore the importance of setting boundaries to avoid feeling worthless and being pushed around in any relationship, and why speaking up and pissing people off is essential to have your own back and maintain your self-respect.
Lisa also delves into how cultural or societal pressures can impact decision-making and why prioritizing oneself is crucial in the long term.
Follow Lisa Bilyeu:
Website: https://www.radicalconfidence.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/
Twitter:https://twitter.com/lisabilyeu
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisabilyeu
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
Good news ladies! If you haven’t figured it out yet, there’s sex of all kinds for us to enjoy, and it’s not all about His parts. There’s much more to sex than penetration, his pleasure, and the nonsensical pressure to perform like a porn star in the bedroom every night.
This episode is dedicated to a happier, healthier sex life for the empowered badass woman that’s prioritizing her health and well-being.
Depending on your background, religious beliefs, and parental tolerance for the conversation of sex, you may not realize the sex-pectations society has pushed on you or the reason your sex drive is non-existent some days.
Dr. Jolene Brighton is the sex-ed doc we all wish our younger selves had (but you’ve got her now, so pay attention!) She’s the author of the book we all need to check out, Is This Normal? Judgment Free Straight Talk About Your Body. She’s a clinical sexologist helping women, a.k.a. “vulva owners” get answers to the questions they dare not say allowed or in mixed company.
In this episode Lisa’s putting aside all the shame and embarrassment to get the takeaways every woman needs to hear today:
Male centric messages about sex have been screwing up our sex lives, our pleasure and our health.We’ve got a lot of messages wrong about porn, about orgasms, and about intimacy. You can start here and now with an upgraded sex-ed class that prioritizes your sexual pleasure not his!
QUOTES:
“Working on your hormones is easier than working on your relationship.”
“Because we put that word sex drive on everything makes people feel like no, but this is something I have to be doing. And that pressure alone, that puts a lot of women out of the mood.
“It's going to take stimuli for your brain to start registering sex for you to start getting into the mood.”
“body image issues can not only put you out of the mood, but it can stop your arousal.”
“The secret to living longer is good sex and lots of pleasure.”
“It's very short sighted for us to only be talking about hormones. I say that as a hormone doctor, in that women are much more complex than that.”
“If your body's in survival mode for any reason, even if it's just because you have a stressful job, you're not going to want to be in the mood, you're gonna have a harder time having pleasurable sex…”
“If she orgasms before penetration, she is more likely to have an orgasm during penetrative sex.”
“As women we are challenged with almost an impossible task, which is loving ourselves and being confident in our bodies and being confident in our relationships. Well, we are inundated from messages in our society that constantly tell us that we're not good enough that we are the problem.”
“In anything you do, consent can always be revoked.”
“if you think about just how much people are shamed about their bodies in general, and then you take it to the genitals, and it's a whole next level”
Follow Jolene Brighton:
Website: https://drbrighten.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DrJoleneBrighten
Pinterest: https://www.pinterest.com/drjolenebrighten/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drjolenebrighten/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drbrighten/
Download For FREE: The Most Important Questions You MUST Ask Your Partner here! - https://bit.ly/3dWyB2d
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
When crap hits the fan and it gets hard, what is your go to response? We’ve all responded to hard situations in ways we’re not proud of.
If you carefully look through some of the toughest moments in your life you can see where insecurity took the lead and where anger and the broken 8 year old you showed up too. Luckily, no matter how old (or recent) those situations are, you still get to decide the meaning of it all and even more importantly you get to decide who you are and how you show up in the thick of it.
Cassandra Freeman has been gracing the screen alongside some of the biggest names in Hollywood and is one of the strongest, most confident and vibrant women you’ll ever come across. As an artist, a performer and actress on screen, Cassandra shares with us her best strategies for not allowing hairy situations to get the best of you.
Uncertainty is undoubtedly something you’ll have to deal with in your journey to being the best badass version of yourself. Before you allow insecurities to bring out the worst in you, take notes on how you can use Cassandra’s Reset Practice to take on the day like nothing ever happened.
Cassandra is an actress and writer best known for her role in Inside Man and better known today as Aunt Viv from Bel-Air, the television series remake of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air..
QUOTES:
“If this was a movie, how does she get through this?”
“Reset is a huge part of my life. Reset and let’s pretend like nothing has happened. Nothing bad has happened and begin again.”
“There’s certain ways that you can create survival for yourself in the darkest moments that allow you to disconnect so you can survive.”
“You have to feel the entire emotion and know it’s going to take you somewhere else.”
“Love throws people off when you greet them with love and grace, it shames them.”
“The brain is like Google, if you’re looking for it, it will hand it to you.”
“Rejection is redirection.”
The unknown is usually what keeps people stuck. The unknown is also where people put their past.”
Follow Cassandra Freeman:
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/cassiedamsel/
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
Sponsors:
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
Visit http://www.srimu.com/lisa to unlock 10% off artisanally crafted NOT cheeses made with plant based ingredients for a delicious new take on the cheeses you adore!
Go to athleticgreens.com/lisa and receive a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase!
Go to http://aura.com/lisa for a 14 day free trial to see if your personal information has been leaked online.
Visit my sponsor Future: https://tryfuture.co/lisa to try your first month for $19 and make 2023 the year you crush your fitness goals.
Go to our sponsor Viome https://tryviome.com/lisa to get 20% off your first 3 months and free shipping - learn if inflammation is causing your issues!
Today’s narrative of the independent, strong, secure, empowered woman says we can do anything we want without a man’s approval. We are not victims or damsels in distress, we are total badasses capable of being CEO of Fortune 500 companies, caring mothers, best friends, truck drivers and construction workers.
With all that we are and all that we do there are still biological differences we may be ignoring in our fight against society’s narrative of oppression.
Is pursuing a man that you’re interested in a defiance of our biological nature or an act of defiance against what men in society say we shouldn’t do?
Pastor RC Blakes is a voice for female empowerment that doesn’t dance around hard conversations and addresses the realities women are struggling with in society. He’s the bestselling author of Queenology, Father-Daughter Talks, Soul-Ties and more. He and his wife, Lisa, also host women's conferences to bring healing and power to women in search of a better version of themselves free of abuse and manipulation.
Today’s conversation brings us some interesting points, some of which may be triggering:
What happens when women pursue men
Why women can’t behave like toxic men without consequences
Instead of looking for a high-value man, seek out what it takes to be a high-value couple with the right person
“Submissive” doesn’t have to be trigger, it can be a clear indication of the man your with
There is a relational rhythm of a healthy masucline-feminine dynamic in high-value relationships that may be a better target to aim at in your next relationship.
QUOTES:
“There’s a price to be paid for a woman who pursues a man.”
“If a woman has to jumpstart a man she will have to keep him motivated in the relationship.”
“If you need to be married or joined to someone, you don’t need to be married or joined to anyone. In other words, if you’re not a fulfilled, healthy and happy individual as a stand alone, you really don’t need to be joined with anyone.”
“When you don’t know your value, people can put you in places that you don’t deserve.”
“No woman should submit to a man that demands submission. If a man has to demand submission he does not deserve it.”
“Just cause a man can afford you doesn’t mean he can value you.”
Follow RC Blakes:
Website: https://www.rcblakes.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@RobertBlakes/
Twitter: https://twitter.com/RC_Blakes
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/rcblakes/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/RCBLAKESJR
Download For FREE: The Most Important Questions You MUST Ask Your Partner here! - https://bit.ly/3dWyB2d
Sponsors:
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
Visit http://www.srimu.com/lisa to unlock 10% off artisanally crafted NOT cheeses made with plant based ingredients for a delicious new take on the cheeses you adore!
Go to athleticgreens.com/lisa and receive a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase!
Go to http://aura.com/lisa for a 14 day free trial to see if your personal information has been leaked online.
Visit my sponsor Future: https://tryfuture.co/lisa to try your first month for $19 and make 2023 the year you crush your fitness goals.
Go to our sponsor Viome https://tryviome.com/lisa to get 20% off your first 3 months and free shipping - learn if inflammation is causing your issues!
If you ever needed a louder, clearer, better reason to start taking care of your brain this is it! Women are more likely to get Alzheimer’s than men, and the shocking truth is that it starts in your brain decades before the first symptom!
Sound the alarm and grab a seat, you’re going to need all the time and determination you have to start changing the habits that have been doing more harm than good on your brain health.
Dr. Daniel Amen, founder of Amen Clinics has scanned brains from all over the world and has one of the largest databases of brain imaging anywhere. He’s scanned brains of A-list celebrities and thought leaders such as Justin Beiber, Jay Shetty, his wife Radhi, and even Lisa’s homie Mel Robbins.
In the next hour you’re going to walk away better than ever armed with the knowledge you need to start examining which habits you have that are destroying your brain health:
Dr. Amen is a psychiatrist that has been helping people recover from traumatic brain injury, emotional trauma, childhood trauma, addiction and more. The female brain has developments and experiences unique to women that men do not. Understanding that difference alone is life changing.
Check out Dr. Amen’s New Book: Change Your Brain Every Day: https://www.amazon.com/Change-Your-Brain-Every-Relationships/dp/149645457X
QUOTES:
“If you are blessed to live to be 85 or older you have a one in two chance of having dementia or having lost your mind, [...] and Alzheimer’s disease starts in your brain decades before you have any symptoms.”
“Your brain is involved with every decision that you make. It’s the organ of loving, learning, and behaving. And when it works right, you tend to work right.”
“I love my mind, but it’s a trouble maker.”
“It’s the undisciplined mind that’s driving the epidemic of teenage depression.”
“Every part of your brain you don’t use becomes less active over time.”
“Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary feeling.”
Follow Dr. Daniel Amen:
Website: https://danielamenmd.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCdHz-vi0JIugmscU_CkUxUQ
Twitter: https://twitter.com/DocAmen
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/doc_amen/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/drdanielamen
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
Sponsors:
Women of Impact Podcast is sponsored by Growthday Network: https://growthday.com/podcasts
Visit http://www.srimu.com/lisa to unlock 10% off artisanally crafted NOT cheeses made with plant based ingredients for a delicious new take on the cheeses you adore!
Go to athleticgreens.com/lisa and receive a FREE 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 free travel packs with your first purchase!
Go to http://aura.com/lisa for a 14 day free trial to see if your personal information has been leaked online.
Visit my sponsor Future: https://tryfuture.co/lisa to try your first month for $19 and make 2023 the year you crush your fitness goals.
Go to our sponsor Viome https://tryviome.com/lisa to get 20% off your first 3 months and free shipping - learn if inflammation is causing your issues!
First dates can be so much fun but we tend to make them way too intense when we start overthinking everything. You’ve got the right outfit, hair and makeup are on point, but when it comes to conversation how deep are you willing to go?
One of the biggest challenges when you start dating is secretly decoding what he meant when he said that? You start conference-calling your closest friends to play detective and decipher his messaging, but why are you not asking him what you really want to know? Why are women so scared of asking the wrong questions and scaring him off too early?
It’s clearly better for us all, emotionally, to find out A.S.A.P is he really into you, does he just want to hook up, or is he really searching for a committed relationship.
Matthew Hussey has been giving women massive truth bombs about men, dating, and how to not be broken hearted for years. His YouTube channel is clearly a fan favorite with close to 3 million subscribers and almost half a BILLION views on his content.
This bite sized nugget is worth replaying and really thinking through before your next date. If you’re already several dates in, this episode is still for you too. Matthew is very clear that you have to stop dismissing and trying to explain away when your partner is saying difficult things for you to hear.
Him: “Not looking for a serious relationship.”
You: “Well, one day he will…”
Stop getting stuck in cycles and start listening and being brave enough to ask the hard questions that really matter to you.
Matthew Hussey has been a guest here on several episodes all binge worthy, and he’s said often, “You can’t scare off the right person for you.” Ask the questions and listen to the answers!
Previous Episodes with Matthew Hussey Relationship Truth Bombs:
Finding the Right One: https://youtu.be/3xyaIh154HE
He’s Not Serious About You: https://youtu.be/pse1IbIc7vM
Avoid This Type of Guy: https://youtu.be/y-Oy9VYg4wM
When He Doesn’t Value You: https://youtu.be/qW7eC_BAqhQ
QUOTES:
“If someone is telling you something that will make their life more difficult to tell you then it’s probably true.”
“We have this real idea of heroes and villains that we need to let go of.”
“A lot of men aren’t liars, they're just great avoiders.”
“Women have to be brave enough to ask the questions that they’re afraid of the answers to.”
“Be kind in your tone but ruthless in your actions.”
Follow Matthew Hussey:
Website: https://www.howtogettheguy.com/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/gettheguyteam
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thematthewhussey/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/CoachMatthewHussey/
Download For FREE: The Most Important Questions You MUST Ask Your Partner here! - https://bit.ly/3dWyB2d
Check out my FREE 4-Part Confidence Workshop! - https://bit.ly/3fZcbO5
Make sure you check out the full interview I did with Matthew Hussey right here! - https://pdst.fm/e/chrt.fm/track/G9GD5F/traffic.megaphone.fm/GRWD9931782208.mp3?updated=1673391422
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