BRAP BRAP! What's going on, Internet? Oh boy, do we have a story -- it's about a nonsense podcast that has run for nearly the length of a full U.S. primary education (with, come to think of it, pretty equivalent educational standards and pay for the teachers).

But now, it is the proverbial graduation ceremony, which means it's time to get day-drunk on hobo liquor one last time with your favorite goofball hosts in this three-hour spectacular. Before we put the button back in cold storage, we get up to the usual stupid shenanigans, reflect on the last 11.5 years, answer a few final listener questions, and hear from our significant others (and yes, someone cries). From the entire Comedy Button cast to everyone who has supported this silly endeavor of ours: Thank you.

Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Anthony Gallegos, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar, with special appearances from Theresa Altano, Stacey Bromley, and Jenn Scoville.

Kristin declares war on caramel, Ryan tells us about the time he almost died from eating Swedish Fish, Avatar: The Way of Water was apparently just stunningly OK, and our pal Jenn crashes the show to taste-test Valentine's Day candy and participate in perhaps the stupidest anatomical discussion that any human beings have ever had. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar, with special guest Jenn Scoville.

Gadzooks! After more than 11 years of this nonsense horseplay, we're finally putting the ol' button back under the protective glass and pretending to go about our lives as well-respected adults who have it all figured out. 

Yes, the Comedy Button is coming to a close with our final episode, coming to you at the end of February/beginning of March/something like that. We've got all the details right here in this mini-episode, so if you don't want to go through life confused and bewildered about why your usual Friday podcast stopped appearing on the Zune Marketplace or wherever these things go now, give it a listen! 

Sincerely from your pals, Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

We manage to introduce the show three different times thanks to the dumb Internet turning off. In part 1, Kristin tells us about her new acting career. Then in part 2, after we lose Kristin, we get lost on some tangent about bumper stickers. Finally, in the epic conclusion, Kristin makes her surprise return and we learn about TikTok haircut culture, hear about a motel that Harry Styles might have banged out in, and go on a wild 1990s movie marathon. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Ryan blows no one's mind with Laff-A-Lympics lore, we learn all about the thin and colorful lines that dumb people put on flags, we do our annual check-in on terrible candy, and we still have that dream about eating a cheese pizza in an airport limo. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Max Scoville.

The Comedy Button presents: A New Year's PSA to clean up your dog's poop. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Kristin shares her birthday plans, we learn George Jetson facts, Ryan gets UM ACTUALLY'd, and we learn about all the times Kristin laughed at some dumb stuff. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

We learn about Pilates, revisit some of the worst sounds on this show, share some George Washington facts, reveal our most-desired cartoon injuries, and offer up some parenting advice. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Ryan attempts to turn this into an ASMR podcast (with horrifying results), Max has a Tim Dolphin update, Scott loves him some Tay Sway, and we collectively discover the dumbest bears, the worst Etsy listings, and the pitfalls of Mystery Inc's business structure, in some of the worst radio we could possibly muster. Starring Brian Altano, Scott Bromley, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

Kristin tells us about her haunted private school, Max is the new hype man for upcoming YouTube star Tim Dolphin (be sure to stick around after the episode for a brief clip), Ryan is somehow starting to feel better about life, and we declare Renaissance Faire to actually be Renaissance Convention. Starring Brian Altano, Ryan Scott, Max Scoville, and Kristin Van De Yar.

(And here's a convenient link to that Tim Dolphin song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nv1ZK6fmjfc)