It's not often that we come across a movie that makes us reflect on the big questions: what is art? What qualifies as a movie? Why the hell did we watch this? Join Tom and Ryan as they talk self-aggrandizing actors, dream logic editing, katana-wielding priests, and of course, Zen filmmaking. It's our review of The Legend of the Rollerblade Seven!

Time stamps:

0:03:45 - Background

0:30:40 - Summary

0:33:30 - Notable Scenes

0:51:00 - The Good

0:57:30 - The Bad

1:04:05 - The Ugly

There's a rogue agent looking to unleash a wave of terror on the world, and only a proto-Charlie's Angels squad of female agents can stop him! Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss super-imposed explosions, surprise assassinations, and undermined female empowerment. It's our review of The Doll Squad!

Time stamps:

0:03:35 - Background

0:23:10 - Summary

0:34:15 - Notable Scenes

0:44:30 - The Good

0:51:50 - The Bad

1:08:25 - The Ugly

A meteorite has awakened a primitive beast from its slumber in the Pacific Northwest. How will a bunch of 1970s hillbillies stop its murder spree? Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss surprising special effects collaborations, condensed plot arcs, and bad British accents. It's our review of The Crater Lake Monster!

Time stamps:

0:03:40 - Background

0:18:30 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:29:55 - Notable Scenes

0:39:40 - The Good

0:44:05 - The Bad

1:00:05 - The Ugly

It was only a matter of time before we ended up reviewing a SyFy original movie, and our desire to revisit the disaster film genre has led us to doing just that. The disaster this time? Earthquakes! Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss phoned-in performances, stealth lasers, and shoe-meltingly bad effects. It's our review of Megafault!

Time stamps:

0:03:40 - Background

0:28:50 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:43:45 - Notable Scenes

0:52:00 - The Good

0:54:50 - The Bad

1:16:35 - The Ugly

It's time for some classic Roger Corman, and this time we're looking at one of his earlier films, a horror monster movie with a classic sci-fi bent. Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss liquid shellfish, never-ending action, and The Professor from Gilligan's Island. It's our review of Attack of the Crab Monsters!

Time stamps:

0:03:40 - Background

0:24:40 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:38:10 - Notable Scenes

0:45:40 - The Good

0:53:35 - The Bad

1:08:35 - The Ugly

Rocky, Million-Dollar Baby, Real Steel...just how many fighting sport films are out there, anyway? This film makes the case that there's at least one too many! Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss porno credits, wrestling vs kickboxing, and Maine-based community theater. It's our review of Final Impact!

Time stamps:

0:02:30 - Background

0:22:00 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:31:40 - Notable Scenes

0:40:05 - The Good

0:44:40 - The Bad

0:57:30 - The Ugly

Foreign sci-fi films are our bread and butter, so how could we resist watching a late 60s Italian film about brave atronauts meeting troubled aliens? Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss Mombasa, Level 4 specimens, and the most successful sci-fi book series ever made. It's our review of Mission Stardust!

Time stamps:

0:04:15 - Background

0:16:25 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:29:30 - Notable Scenes

0:34:15 - The Good

0:39:00 - The Bad

0:51:55 - The Ugly

2022 was the year we came out of and/or started ignoring the pandemic, but did the movies this year make us sick? Which visual was the most stomach-churning? Which terrible moment is seared into our memories? And what exciting first is happening for our awards this year? Find out in the 2022 Schlocky Awards!

Time Stamps:

0:03:25 - Explanation, Film List, and Lifetime Achievement Award 0:12:50 - Worst Character 1:07:10 - Worst Moment or Line 2:01:50 - Worst Visual 2:17:35 - Best Moment 2:26:05 - The 10 Worst Films of the Year

Ho ho ho! It's our seasonal holiday episode, and we're once again tackling a Christmas romance that doesn't deliver! This time it's former sweethearts who have gone their separate ways...but can the magic of the season bring them back together? Join Tom and Ryan as they discuss beauty pagent drama, movie Santas, bad sound production, and real-life rom-coms. It's our review of The Christmas Coupon!

Time stamps:

0:02:55 - Background

0:19:35 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:30:15 - Notable Scenes

0:38:20 - The Good

0:40:35 - The Bad

0:55:45 - The Ugly

More Roger Corman?? Say it ain't so! We've got a depressing 1950s morality tale all about the corrupting influence of money, power, and worst of all--women! Join Tom and Ryan as they talk about professional safecrackers, precise timing, and swift conclusions. It's our review of High School Big Shot!

Time stamps:

0:03:55 - Background

0:21:50 - Back-of-the-Box Summary

0:35:00 - Notable Scenes

0:43:10 - The Good

0:49:15 - The Bad

0:58:35 - The Ugly