In honor of Halloween, Kevin conjures up a spooky tale of vampires and a town gone mad. Also, Greg drinks a White Claw.

Sources:

https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/the-great-new-england-vampire-panic-36482878/

https://www.history.com/news/the-last-american-vampire Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

John discusses a NASA math blunder that took out a satellite. (Hint: they forgot to carry the one.) Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

They say war is hell. And no one knows that better than the Australians. In 1932 they waged war against a fighting force that is still undefeated to this day. The force? Emus. On this episode Greg discusses the great Australian Emu War of 1932. Come for the knowledge…stay for the accents.

Sources:

emu-war-how-australia-started-a-war-against-flightless-birds-and-lost.html">https://www.republicworld.com/world-news/australia/great-emu-war-how-australia-started-a-war-against-flightless-birds-and-lost.html

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HDI is back! On an early fall day in Arkansas, 1980 the sky was blue, the birds were chirping, school was just back in session, and a three megaton nuclear bomb nearly decimated a chunk of the state. How could this happen? We’ll talk about that and Kevin’s high level safe word on our latest episode.

Sources:

https://interestingengineering.com/innovation/1980-titan-ii-disaster-fallen-socket-wrench-triggers-explosion-of-armed-nuclear-missile

https://ualrexhibits.org/zerohour/titan-ii/

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Hey Mistorians! We are taking a much needed summer break. We are also going to do some retooling of the show. We are confident that it will be bigger than 10 Super Bowls. But let’s not oversell it. We’re on hiatus for the month of August, returning in September. Have a wonderful summer and go out and make some history! Or babies. Or elotes. Or bathtub gin. We don’t care what you do. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

“Guns don’t kill people. People kill people.” But as the great Eddie Izzard once said…the gun helps. On the latest episode of HDI John talks guns. And holy shit he knows a lot about them for a pacifist! You’ll laugh…you’ll cry…you’ll learn…then you’ll probably cry some more because America’s gun problem shows no signs of getting better. at lease we’re on a Canadian podcast network. Keep those couches warm for us, Sonar. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

As most of us know five conservative judges from the US Supreme Court recently took it upon themselves to drop their collective pants and shit all over women’s rights by making it so that abortion is no longer a guaranteed right. This is, of course, after some judges said they wouldn’t do that in their confirmation hearings. Yes, even judges can be lying pieces of shit hellbent on promoting their personal, religious agenda. On the latest episode of HDI we get fiery over this and other human rights the court may try to take away. Because if there’s one thing we know about people in power, they rarely give a shit about the rest of us.

Also, John airs his grievances concerning the inconsistencies within the Star Wars universe. How can they harness the power to create lightsabers but they can’t teleport or time travel? What the fuck, Lucas?

And John still isn’t drinking. Which is lame. But he still brings up Del Taco. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

All of us have some experience coaching and/or being coached. Sometimes your coach was a mentor…a teacher…a friend…someone to confide in. And other times your coach was just a giant piece of shit. On this episode Greg talks about coaching and what it means to him to mold the young people of America. And John and Kevin wonder how he passed the background check. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

The idea of American isolationism has a long and complicated past. From George Washington to Trump and his minions people have clamored for an America first approach to diplomacy throughout our history. On the latest episode John leads the charge in a discussion about our role as a world leader. Plus, Kevin has a suggestion for John and Greg on how to fix their combative relationship. (Hint: it’s sex.) Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Stand up comedy is an art, it’s a platform, and it’s one of the best mediums for social commentary. But it’s not without it’s pitfalls. On this episode we talk about everything stand up comedy and how difficult it is to walk the line of being funny and being offensive. Plus you’ll hear about John and Greg’s short (very short) stand up careers. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Back in June of 2020, when we were all hiding in our homes and spraying Lysol on our groceries, Kevin led an HDI episode about whether or not the divide in America was so deep that it couldn’t be fixed. He asked the question, should America break up? We decided we should stay together for the kids but the divide is greater than ever. Should we now think about a split? Join us for our latest episode as we discuss in our first ever HDI Revisited. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

On the latest episode of HDI John leads the crew in a discussion about feminism. The disparity in pay and even rights between the sexes that still exists…today…in 2022…is unacceptable. We don’t have all the answers. Just most of them. Plus Greg smokes the pot. Like…a lot of the pot. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Kevin needs to have a convo with his friends and co-hosts about something that is concerning him: the amount of crazy assholes in Congress. On this episode we discuss Marjorie Taylor Greene, Lauren Boebert, and the whacky conspiracy theorists infecting our government. Are we doomed? Probably. But it’s a hilarious kind of doom. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Marriage can be tough and not every couple can make it through until the end. Unless that end is one person murdering the other or, more commonly, in divorce. Greg takes the crew on a journey about divorce in a thinly veiled attempt to justify his impending breakup with John. It won’t be pretty. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Here at History Defeats Itself we like to put our guests to work. Why should they have it easy?! Rahaleh Nassri of the incredible podcast Violent Femme was kind enough to slum it with Kevin, John, and Greg for an episode and she leads us in a discussion about gender parity. Download the new episode today and laugh along as Rahaleh tells the boys to get their little asses into the kitchen and get her a sandwich. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Some see graffiti as art, others as vandalism. But whether it’s funny, political, clever, a crime, or just fucking cool everyone can agree that it elicits an emotion. On the latest episode of HDI it’s part three of our spirit animal series. John reveals his spirit animal to be the chimpanzee and we discuss street art. How did we get there? Great question! Listen and find out. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

On episode two of our Sprit Animal Series Kevin has an inner conflict about his actual spirit animal and ultimately leads the crew in a discussion about sport hunting, also known and trophy hunting. Do we solve this existential crisis? Let’s put it this way: after listening to this episode the NRA and PETA are going to be the bestest of buddies. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

In part one of our three part series about our spirit animals, Greg reveals that his spirit animal is the drug Klonopin. And if you’ve listened to Greg, and you know what Klonopin is, you get it. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

What’s better than listening to three heathens discuss the history and issues with the Catholic Church? Listening to four heathens talk about the history and issues with the Catholic Church! On this episode former pastor and current atheist Trevor Poelman of the hilarious podcast Belief it or Not joins us to discuss the complicated and often illegal and immoral history of the Roman Catholic Church. Bring your crucifix because you’re gonna need to say some Hail Marys after this one. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

There are people out there who believe wholeheartedly that the Wim Hof Method has immense health benefits. Many swear by cold showers and ice baths. Did Kevin find his inner fire after six weeks of g-tummo breathing, cold therapy, and meditation? Did he find positives in taking freezing cold showers on freezing cold mornings? Will his story convince John and Greg to give it a try? Check out part two of Kevin’s Wim Hof adventure and find out. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Pain: it sucks. And treating pain can suck even worse as you try to navigate the insurance, skeptical doctors, and the chance of opioid addiction. On this episode Greg talks about pain and pain management. It sounds heavy but if anyone can make pain funny, it’s us three idiots. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

One of the biggest things we’ve learned through two years of isolation and semi-isolation is that feeling connected to people is very important to our well being. On this episode John discusses human connection with his bestest buds, Kevin and Greg. Because if any three people have a strong connection, it’s us. Unless one of us loses internet. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

What if we told you the keys to healthy living are breathing exercises that mimic hyperventilating and taking cold showers? You might decide that healthy living isn’t for you. On this episode Kevin introduces his co-hosts to Dutch extreme athlete and motivational speaker Wim Hof and breaks down his Wim Hof Method that focuses on deep breathing, meditation, and cold exposure to help find your inner power. Is this guy crazy or is he on to something? To find out, Kevin is committing himself to following the Wim Hof Method for the next six weeks after which he will report his findings. Let’s hear it for hypothermia! Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Toxic masculinity is a real thing and it permeates our pop culture, politics, social media, the workplace, and many other aspects of daily life. On this episode Greg leads a great conversation about how toxic masculinity affects our society, what we need to do about it, and what it really means to be a man. And he shows us all how emo he truly is. Not because of his sensitivity. But because of the beanie he’s wearing indoors. In California. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

There is some amazing technology out there that we use every day but we rarely, if ever, think about the advancements in safety that came along with this technology that keeps us from maiming ourselves. On this episode John educates us on the past, present, and future of safety plus he reveals his secret for getting in the carpool lane. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

When the Washington Redskins finally changed their name most of us thought…how did it take this long? But it doesn’t end there. The Cleveland Indians will have a new name for 2022 and there is increasing pressure on teams like the Atlanta Braves, Kansas City Chiefs, and Chicago Blackhawks. The issue is that many Native Americans don’t want sports teams using their names and likenesses in cartoonish ways to promote their brands and sell apparel. Some say it’s past time to make changes, others feel some are being overly sensitive. Join us as we tackle the mascot debate and laugh along as John tries to understand sports. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

What does it mean to be agnostic? Is it simply someone who doesn’t believe in God but is too scared to admit it, ya know, just in case? Greg enlightens the crew on the subject of agnosticism. Is this episode blasphemous? Sure. But if there’s a heaven and hell we’re pretty much screwed anyway. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Cancel Culture has taken the world by storm. But is it just? Should we be working harder to educate those who are saying things that get themselves canceled so we can have a more understanding and more inclusive society? We give our thoughts on this and more. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

When society as we know it collapses…will you be ready? We sure as hell won’t be! On this episode we discuss survivalism and prepping. You’ll learn the history, some tips, and what one item John would bring if he was on Naked and Afraid. Hint: it’s not even remotely useful for survival. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

If you’ve listened to our show the one thing you undoubtedly don’t want from the three of us is advice. After all, in our last episode about the stock market Kevin suggested people should invest in Netscape. But Greg decided to give the advice game a go anyway. On this episode we discuss the 7 year itch. Why do people get a wandering eye and how can couples prevent it? Greg has all the answers. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Do you have a lot of really basic questions about the stock market but don’t want to ask anyone for fear that you’ll sound stupid? You’ve come to the right place because we don’t have any issues sounding like idiots. On this episode John attempts to teach Kevin and Greg how the stock market works. You know…with all the bonds, dividends, moneystuff, and what not. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Essential oils are everywhere now. If you have an ailment, there’s an oil for it. But are they real or are they simply useless products that are part of pyramid schemes? On this episode Kevin guides his cohorts in a discussion about essential oils and aromatherapy. And, as a bonus, you’ll get a multi level marketing lesson from John and Greg. You’re going to want to get in on the ground floor, we promise you that. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Stress can be really hard on us. Whether you’re having trouble at work, dealing with problems at home, or having to do a podcast with two people who berate you on a regular basis our problems in life can cause physical, mental and emotional anguish. On this episode Greg talks about the history of a stress diagnosis and how best to cope. Apparently heavy drinking and large amounts of weed are not good ways to handle stress. Which was very disappointing to Kevin and John. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

On this episode we are joined by special guests Rhys and Jesse of the hilarious podcast Canadian Politics is Boring to discuss pharmaceuticals. We’ll get into the good, the bad, and the ugly of legal drugs. Plus, Rhys talks about the joys of playing with a bucket of mercury when he was a kid. All I got to play with when I was little were Transformers. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Bullying is a real problem in this country. From middle school lugheads who call fellow classmates childish names and steal their lunch money to former presidents who call fellow politicians childish names and try to steal all the money, bullies are everywhere. On this episode Greg talks about the acts and ramifications of bullies and their victims. It’s not a good life for either. There’s no better place to learn about the effects of bullying than from three friends who constantly bully each other. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Most people learn a lot in college. Like how we didn’t give up when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor. But aside from learning, college also provides many of our young people with something else: massive student loan debt. On this episode of HDI Kevin guides his cohorts along the perilous road of rising college costs and the debt kids amass trying to get an education. Plus, Greg reveals his thoughts on what a toga part means in his adult years. Hint: it’s not something you’d want to attend. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

We’ve been to a few bars in our day. And by few I mean thousands and thousands. On this episode John goes into the past and present of bars, taverns, pubs, speakeasies, gin joints, and watering holes. Grab a stool, order a cold one, and try not to make eye contact with the creepy dude in the corner. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Owning a home is something most people strive for. We all deserve the chance to have our own piece of land, have a house we can customize however we want, and to be in crippling debt. This week Greg is the landlord as we discuss home ownership in the U.S. You better have his rent, or you’re going to end up doing things you’re not proud of. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

One of the more divisive topics in the United States, along with the Taco Bell vs Del Taco debate, is gun control. On one hand you have people who want sensible gun laws and efforts to curb gun violence and mass shootings. And on the other hand you have people who believe any gun laws trample on their Constitutional rights. If you’re a fan of HDI, you probably know how the three of us feel about it. But nonetheless we have a solid discussion and attempt to truly look at both sides of the coin. Plus, Greg and John write an REO Speewagon parody song. You’re welcome, “Weird Al” Yankovic. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Feeling guilty about not giving enough to charity? Well, join along so John can make you feel worse! On this episode we discuss philanthropy and charity. We discuss the most giving people throughout history, how the system works and doesn’t, and what needs to happen to ensure an equitable society. Plus, laugh along as Kevin tells the story of his snowboarding accident and hospital stay. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

On our first episode back from our short time on the IR Greg leads the charge in an enlightening, if not frustrating look at the English language. Why do we use the same words for different meanings? Why are there silent letters? Why can’t John figure out how to use commas? Join along as we break it all down. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Kevin’s old. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

We all occasionally read our horoscopes and have a good laugh, share with friends, or wonder what the hell it could possibly mean. But some take these things very seriously. On this episode we talk horoscopes and we dabble in astrology. We’re pretty sure we’re all astrologers now too. It doesn’t seem very hard to get that title. Grab a crystal, invite your favorite high society neo-shaman over, and let’s find out what your future holds. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

As marijuana becomes legal in more states and countries the debate about the legalization of all drugs continues to rage. So John set out to research and discuss one of his favorite things: weed! Join us as we talk about the history of cannabis, how it became illegal, and why Kevin is still hesitant to smoke out of a bong after an incident in high school. Spark up a J, order some Taco Bell, and enjoy along with us. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Everyone wants to live their best life. But in today’s tech-filled world of instant gratification and 24 hour accessibility, are we prone to constantly wondering if we could be living a better one? That’s what Greg set out to discover. On this episode we’re talking about FOMO, or, fear of missing out. Even as I was typing this I got a text message and stopped typing to check it. Was it important? No. But if I didn’t check it I would have been consumed by the thought of what it could be. Is it an emergency? Is it a new Instagram like? Did Conan O’Brien finally lift the restraining order and accept my friend request? I would never have known. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

There are a growing number of “prophets” appearing in this country who claim to be messengers for God. Sometimes their predictions are right, like when one predicted the Chiefs would win the Super Bowl in 2020. Most times they’re wrong, like when they proclaim that Donald Trump will win a second term, or that he’s been anointed by God, or that he’s not a complete piece of shit. Join along as as we talk about political prophecies, why the prophets are dangerous, and what happens when these so called prophets are wrong. Grab some sacramental wine and laugh along with us. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Motivated by his desire to learn more about Valentine’s Day, John leads the crew in a discussion about holidays from around the world and across history. You’ll learn about the origins of holidays like Halloween, strange holiday traditions of yore that even include assault, and why John enjoys camping so much. (It’s not just the fresh air he looks forward to.) Join us as we celebrate every holiday in about an hour! Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Hangovers are no fun. Considering the nausea, headache, fatigue, and general malaise they cause you would think we would just abstain from alcohol. But do we? Hell no! We get right back on that horse. On this episode Greg teaches us all about the joy and wonder of hangovers. Grab some Advil, a little hair of the dog, and feel the pain along with us. Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Let’s be honest, most people are terrible drivers. Not us though. We’re great drivers. Everyone else is the problem. But few things can get people more blind with rage than when someone wrongs them on the road. On this episode Kevin takes the crew for a ride as they discuss road rage. Get those middle fingers ready…because John isn’t using his blinker.

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We are so excited to be joining The Sonar Network that Greg and John went and got Covid. But that didn’t stop us from recording! Join us as John leads the crew in a discussion about propaganda and how it is used to tell us what to think. Because, let’s face it, we humans are easily manipulated. Mask up and enjoy the conversation!

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We all yearn for the day when we can eat at restaurants without wearing Hazmat suits. But until then, come reminisce about it with us. On this episode Greg leads the way in a rousing discussion about dining out, restaurant experiences, and food. Plus John recounts an adorable story about stealing money from shitty teenagers. Pull up a chair and join us. Drinks are on Greg.

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Is local news dying? The short answer is yes. The long answer is also yes. But there is still time to save it. On this episode of HDI Kevin rings in 2021 with a topic that threatens our democracy as we know it. Also John gets pretty drunk. Not intentionally…he’s just a lightweight. Happy New Year, Mistorians!

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For the final episode in our series of episodes about things that make us uncomfortable Kevin reveals that he is not the biggest fan of heights. The crew discusses thrill seeking and adrenaline junkies in our most action packed episode yet! We recommend listening to this episode while free climbing or hang gliding.

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In part two of our series of episodes about things that make us uncomfortable John confirms what everyone already knew: he’s afraid of very optimistic people. Join us as we explore the benefits of optimism, the advantages of a pessimistic outlook, and John’s feeling that extremely optimistic people are dangerous. Give it a listen. Or don’t. What does it matter anyway? Sigh…

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Before Kevin’s baby came into the world to dominate his life the crew recorded a quick series of episodes to publish while Kevin is out of commission. The theme: things that make us uncomfortable. On the first of the series Greg leads us in a conversation about enochlophobia. We know what you’re thinking…what the hell does that mean? It means he has a fear of crowds. Another thing we know you’re thinking: that guy is afraid of everything. You are correct.

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Donald Trump did his best to destroy and pillage some of the most beautiful places in this country. Hopefully beginning in mid-January we can work to undo…well…pretty much everything he did in the past four years. On this episode John guides us through a discussion about national parks and federal land. We talk about Teddy Roosevelt, the massive efforts over the years to protect federal lands, and how one administration sought to destroy those efforts in record time. Also, Greg really, really likes Cool Ranch Doritos.

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How we view child discipline has certainly changed over generations. There was a time when physical and emotional abuse was the norm. At the time they called it tough love. Now we know it was child abuse and created emotionally crippled, angry humans. On this episode Greg leads the crew in a discussion about child discipline and how we are learning that treating kids like humans and with respect can lead to well adjusted, emotionally strong adults. Imagine that. Listen now or John will give you a taste of the back of his hand.

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Getting older certainly has its negatives. But it doesn’t have to be all bad. Look at Greg…he has a solid zest for life and he’s like 100. (As you can see Greg doesn’t write these.) On the next episode of HDI it’s Kevin’s turn to lead the crew and we have lots of fun talking about aging. And we promise to have you home by 7.

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The idea of what a relationship is supposed to be is changing. And we couldn’t be happier about it because the three of us can finally get that cabin in Vermont we’ve been talking about for years. On this episode of HDI John leads the crew and we’re talking about polyamory. You’ll laugh, you’re learn a thing or two, and you may even end up going to your significant other with an “idea” about how to make your relationship more interesting. (Disclaimer: The hosts of HDI will not reimburse anyone for hotel fees or alimony payments.) Enjoy!

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Some people bet on sports, others on the ponies, many love Las Vegas, and still others bet on how many slices of pepperoni a pizza will have when it arrives. Whatever your preferred game of chance one thing is for sure: humans love to bet on things. On the latest episode of HDI Greg takes us through the psychology of gambling. Money will be lost, relationships will be broken, and a man who placed a bet on Tiger Woods will give us a fit not seen since the days of Eric the Anal. Adducci!

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Why do we believe in superstitions? We know they’re ridiculous. Logically we know that knocking on wood doesn’t bring us luck. We know that walking under a ladder isn’t going to lead to tragedy. (Well, unless the ladder falls on you while you’re under it.) And deep down Greg knows that the order he puts his hockey gear on won’t make him any better at the sport. But many of us succumb to these beliefs. On this episode Kevin leads the crew and we’re talking superstitions. And we apologize for the appearance of Robot John in place of actual John. We assure you John feels shame for his technical snafu.

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When you have great hair…you flaunt it. No matter what age you are. On this episode of HDI the crew discusses hair. And Greg and John attack Kevin’s sense of style. Which, if you’ve met them, is extremely ironic. Plus, we pose the question: if Hitler had worn the Tom Selleck…would Tom Selleck wear the Hitler since the Tom Selleck would be forever frowned upon? Think about it.

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There was a time when “getting your bell rung” or “seeing stars” just meant you needed to shake the cobwebs, grab a smelling salt, and get back out there! Nowadays we know that head injuries are nothing to take lightly. On this episode Greg leads the crew in a discussion about concussions. It’s a great conversation, although Greg doesn’t remember that on account of all the concussions he’s had.

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Science denial is everywhere in our society from those who think COVID is a hoax to climate change deniers to people who don’t believe hair helmets regrow hair (ahem..Kevin). On this episode the crew talks about how so many people are opting to mistrust scientists with huge brains and years of schooling, research, and training and instead put their faith in a President who looks like the fourth member of the Lollipop Guild. I mean…why not? Side note: John had some marijuana-induced technical issues with his sound file. So please forgive the slight dip in production quality.

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War! Huh! Good God, y’all! What is it good for? Absolutely…lots if you’re a power hungry, land grabbin’ politician. On this episode John leads the crew in a discussion about American Wars. We talk history, you’ll see if Kevin finally wins the Price is Right dining set, and we chat about Patrick Swayze. Because…Road House!

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Birth control has been around for a lot longer than you might think. Humans have been trying to figure out how to enjoy sex without the worry of having a baby for thousands of years. On this episode of HDI Greg leads the way and educates us on the baby blocking methods that could have prevented any one of us from being here. Greg may have wished that Kevin and John’s parents had used something 40-something years ago.

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It’s painfully obvious to all that we live in a divided country. Our two party political system has become so contentious that people are picking sides, digging in, and flipping the bird to the other side. Is it hopeless? Can we figure out a way to come together? Perhaps it’s time to admit the Union didn’t work and that it’s time to break up. On this episode the crew attempts to answer the question: would we be better off if the United States split up? Join us for a rousing discussion that might get us all deported.

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A lot of people don’t know that John was in the Blair Witch Project. He. Was. So. Scared! Wanna learn about witches, warlocks, and witchcraft? John is leading this episode and we’re talking black magic. Spells will be cast and lingams may be steamed. Grab your broom and hold on tight…cuz this is gonna get weird.

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The Mormon faith is complicated and nuanced. And what better way to learn about it then from three liberal heathens? On this episode of HDI Greg teaches us about Mormonism. Can they really not drink alcohol? Spoiler alert: no, they can’t. Clearly this is not the religion for us since Kevin drank a bottle of wine during the recording. Put on your favorite pair of magical underwear, crack a beer, and come be saved with us!

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Ah, Spring. The snow is melting…birds are chirping…grass is growing…and the person sitting next to you on the bus has wads of Kleenex shoved up each nostril. Anyone who suffers from seasonal allergies knows that pain. On this episode of HDI we’re talking about allergies, something Kevin knows all to well. We talk about hay fever, food allergies, and how John saved Greg’s life once by administering Benadryl. (Spoiler alert: it wasn’t orally.) Join us for our most congested episode yet.

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Humans have been interested in the end of the world for thousands of years. Whether it’s a religious belief, a psychic premonition, or a science based prediction, many believe life on earth has an expiration date. On this episode of HDI John leads the crew in a rousing discussion about how it will all end. John thinks it’s soon, Kevin thinks it’s further out, and Greg doesn’t care either way as long as he’s the first to go.

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The media has been in our lives in a variety of forms for generations. It informs, educates, and even helps catch bad guys. Yes the media has a checkered past and a history of being dishonest. (Sorry, Fox News, lying to the public is another thing you didn’t invent.) But it’s certainly done more good than bad. It’s a vital tool to Democracy. Don’t believe us? Just ask someone in North Korea. Or better yet, listen to the latest episode and let John convince you!

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On another special Covid-free quarantine episode Greg leads the crew in a chat about our furry friends. Not actual furries…social distancing prohibits furry gatherings. We’re talking about dogs! Grab a treat and settle in for what we hope is a brief diversion from the current reality.

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Ah conspiracy theories…fodder for tabloids and wannabe journalists alike. They can be entertaining like people believing that the earth is flat and they can be deplorable like someone claiming a school shooting was faked in an attempt to take people’s guns away. (Seriously…eat shit Alex Jones.) On this episode of HDI we’re talking conspiracy theories, in all their bizarre glory. Amazingly though, we never talked about Elvis. But don’t worry we definitely chat about Mel Gibson. Also the earth is hollow. You heard it here first!

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An HDI Special Presentation: We’re all trying to make the best out of having to stay home. Here at HDI we decided to do a virus-free, off schedule episode on what we all want to be doing right now…playing outside. Kevin leads the crew as we chat about how Americans aren’t doing as much in the great outdoors as we used to. We’ll chat about the benefits of spending time outside, the harms of a primarily indoor lifestyle, and also…has anyone else not actually seen the movie Grease or is Kevin alone on this one? Look for an Instagram poll later this week.

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Ah, the American Dream: our right to be born in the slums, work hard, and eventually become CEOs of multi-billion dollar companies that don’t have to pay taxes. On the latest episode of HDI Kevin leads the crew in a talk about what drives us to achieve the greatest heights we can. And who actually has a legitimate shot at the American Dream. (Spoiler alert…it’s white men.) Journey with us as we chat and light fancy cigars with hundos! Well, probably more like 20s. Actually it’s singles. Honestly they’re Swisher Sweets that someone left in Greg’s car six years ago and we can’t find a lighter. We’re releasing this one a couple days early since everyone could use a laugh right now. Enjoy!

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Join us for our first ever Swear Jar Episode! John leads the crew in a discussion about censorship. So what did we do? We censored ourselves. And we’re using our profanity for good by donating to charity every time we swear. This episode is benefiting Child Help, a great non-profit that helps abused and neglected kids. You can help too! Head to our Campaign Page and make a pledge for each time we curse. (Don’t worry, you can cap it.) Let’s help some great kids get a second chance!

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Dating has been around for a long time. From leaving a calling card, giving a wink, and hoping for the best to swiping right (or is it left) with a feverish vigor in an attempt to find the perfect mate, humans have long engaged in the courting process. On this episode of HDI Greg leads the crew in a discussion about dating. And who better to talk about dating than two married men and another guy in a committed relationship? But don’t worry…we have opinions and stories that will make you laugh, cry, and feel bad for us.

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Ah credit cards…the cause of and solution to all of life’s problems. Or, at least, many of them. On this episode of HDI we’re chatting about revolving debt…in all its glory. We’ll talk history, present, pros, cons, and everything in between. Plus, John will give you his current credit score, social security number, mother’s maiden name, current and previous addresses, salary, and turn ons and turn offs. Come for the humor, stay for the identity theft.

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So many of us start our days with that sweet, sweet jolt of glorious caffeine. But it comes at a price. And not just the exorbitant cost of going to a Starbucks. There are environmental costs as well. On this episode John leads the crew in a discussion about coffee. So grab a cup of your favorite brew, spike it if you need to, and join us for an energetic discussion. Who you callin’ a psycho??!!

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It’s seriously astounding what used to pass for advertising. Was society that shitty to women? Spoiler alert: yes…it was. But we’re getting better, despite the best efforts of those still stuck in the 50’s. On this episode of HDI we’re talking about gender roles. We’ll talk about how they were, how they’ve changed, and why it’s totally fair for all women to despise men. Greg’s leading the charge this week and he’s wearing that thing we like.

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Our strong desire to buy lots of stuff is nothing new. But it is far easier to be an excessive consumer these days. Just look at the metric shit ton of people who shopped online this past Black Friday. On this special holiday edition of HDI Kevin leads a discussion on consumerism. We’ll talk about holiday shopping and how Americans can never have enough crap and we’ll also discuss the minimalist and zero waste movements. It’s the perfect thing to listen to while you’re stuck in traffic, filled with holiday rage, and cursing out other motorists while on your way to buy stuff no one wants because you waited until the last minute to do your shopping. Happy Holidays everyone!

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We all drive right? Well, maybe not all of us. Babies don’t drive, or at least, really shouldn’t. Some people commute by train. Or bus. Or dune buggy. But most of us drive a car, truck, or SUV fairly regularly. On the latest episode of HDI John enlightens us on the complicated history of the automobile industry and its pioneers. Can a person be amazingly innovative and horribly bigoted? The only way to know for sure is to listen. Or research it yourself. But listening to us is easier.

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On the latest HDI the crew talks about anxiety and mental health. Anxiety is a very real and debilitating thing.  If you don’t believe us just listen to how anxious Greg is talking about his anxiety. This subject has affected all three of us very deeply. Download HDI and go on this journey with us. Because we love our loyal listeners we’re releasing this episode a few days early so you can listen to your three favorite knuckleheads while traveling over the river and through the woods to your holiday destination. Happy Thanksgiving! Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Fast food is satisfying. It’s delicious. It’s cheap. It’s easy. And it’s one of the worst things we can put in our bodies. But we all do it…a lot. Join us for the latest episode of HDI when Kevin leads the crew in a discussion about fast food…in all it’s greasy glory. Wanna hear John and Greg get super defensive and attempt to poke holes in air tight information about the quality of fast food? You’ve come to the right play place! Brought to you By: The Sonar Network

Have you ever wanted to hear John talk about pegging? Of course you haven’t. But you also know you can’t resist! On this episode of HDI the crew talks about human sexuality. We’ll teach you about all sorts of things you didn’t know, didn’t wanna know, or didn’t wanna learn about from three awkward, grown men. Mom…maybe sit this one out.

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First and foremost (if you can see the image for this episode) that is a fucked up ad. Also, smoking is definitely not good for you. 2/3 of the HDI podcast team are former smokers. The other 1/3 is super judgey about it and seems to enjoy telling the other 2/3 how much irreparable damage they’ve done to their bodies. But don’t let that stop you from checking out the latest episode of History Defeats Itself. Sit back, relax, listen, and smoke ’em if you got ’em!

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Ghosts are everywhere. They’re in your bedroom, in your car, in your plumbing, in your 2 stroke weed eater engine, in your hair, in your parent’s sex dungeon, in your Skinny Cinnamon Dulce Latte, in your leftover Chinese food, in your sock drawer, in your podcast microphone, and in your elderly, racist cat. The good news is that if you’re in need of an expert to come and help deal with your ghost problem, there are a lot of them out there. Like a lotta lot. Like a crazy amount of people call themselves ghost hunters. Are they legit or are they just running around like a bunch of meddling kids? Listen…and be enlightened.

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It’s probably safe to say that the majority of us take living in a democracy for granted. But most of us vote and the ones who don’t still probably know they should. On this episode we’re talking about voting. Have we learned how important our vote is? Are we aware of how difficult it is for some people to cast their ballot? Can John pronounce electoral? The only way to know for sure is to listen.

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God it feels good to swear. You wanna know how good? How did you answer that question? Probably like this: “You’re __________ right it feels _________ good to swear you mother ________ son of a _____________ stick!” We all have our own fill ins for that sentence. This week the crew is talking about profanity. Questions will be answered. People driving next to you in traffic while you’re listening to this will think you’re a monster. And have you wondered how to really insult someone in Russia? Take a listen. We have some suggestions.

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Look, flat earthers are no different than you and I. Except that they believe that the earth is a disc, the moon landing was faked, no one’s ever been in space, NASA doesn’t really exist, Antarctica is a giant ice wall, the Earth and the sun are the same size, gravity doesn’t exist, scientists are frauds, all space photography is faked, and that Elvis is alive and runs the NSA. Other than that they are just like the rest of us. Open your eyes and jump on the truth train. Choo choo!

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No matter what your opinion is regarding the crisis at the border one thing we should all remember is that the United States of America was built by immigrants. It was a fundamental part of our growth. John leads the charge this week as we tackle one of the more hot button issues in our country today.

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Let’s talk about death, ba-by. Let’s talk about you, and me. Okay that didn’t really work. But we weren’t lying…we’re talking about the death penalty! Greg enlightens us all on the history and current status of capital punishment. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll learn never to say Mel Gibson’s name three times in the mirror.

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On this episode the crew discusses the human experience. Are we truly experiencing life or are we only living to post on our social media accounts? Are we more concerned with impressing people with where we’ve been than actually being in the moment? Is Kevin really a 75 year old man trapped in a 40…er…I mean…26 year old’s body? There’s only one way to find out. Join us for another episode of History Defeats Itself!

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Read my lips. We’re talking about taxes! John leads the charge this week and takes us on a journey. A journey that reminds us how much money we have to give to the government. Side note: are home phone lines deductible?

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For their second episode, Kevin, John, and Greg tackle the topic of vaccinations. You’ll learn about vaxers, anti-vaxers, and how much more annoying John is when he has whooping cough. The diagnosis is hilarity and the only cure is listening! That’s stupid, I should change that. Eh…fuck it.

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People love their diet fads. Whether they choose to go carb-less, consume nothing but meat and booze, take up smoking, or get sedated for 3/4 of the day people will go to great lengths to shed the pounds. In our inaugural episode the crew discusses food, weight loss, body image, and diet fads of today and yesterday to see if we’ve learned from our history or if we’re simply going to keep latching on to quick fixes. Because, after all, if you aren’t awake…you aren’t eating cake.

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Join along as three guys that fell asleep during history class bring you a comedy podcast about their quest for meaning. Each episode we dive into a single topic that will range from the mundane to the fascinating. Only one of us does the research leaving the other two in the dark to learn along with you, the listener. In every episode we will trace the origin, discuss the present day impact, and attempt to forecast the future, all in an effort to determine if our subject has been a success or if it’s another example of how History Defeats Itself.

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