We thought the odd Instagram post apologising for missing a penalty or a sending off was far enough. Now, Romelu Lukaku has broken new bizarre ground with his heartfelt plea for forgiveness - all for speaking Italian nicely.

Kate, Jim and Andy mourn this latest nail in football's coffin ahead of a potentially dominant Chelsea performance against Antonio Conte's impressive Spurs. We also serve up a thorough breakdown of various German sausages and celebrate the return of The King*.

*his words, not ours.

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