In 1986, Sylvester Stallone was arguably the biggest star on the planet. Rocky, Rambo, Rhinestone… well, forget Rhinestone, but those other two killed it at the box office. So how to follow that kind of iconic success? Why not make an ultraviolet cop movie with good ol’ Cannon Films called Cobra? It’s an unbelievably mindless and blatant riff on the better (if equally proto-fascist) Dirty Harry about a rogue cop who takes the law into his own hands and kills a bunch of whack-a-doodle domestic terrorists after they go on a murder rampage in his city. Sure, there might be an actual story buried in there somewhere, but who cares? We get car chases, gun fights, explosions and Stallone dropping one-liners like he’s Schwarzenegger or something. Cobra may be a cult classic now, but watching it again is like seeing a parody of every 80s tough guy flick cranked to 11.