As a prelude to Nancy’s private call with her beloved dating coach, Sheri and Nancy talk beauty and self-care. A girl’s got to be ready for dates, after all. And the middle of life is an excellent time to ramp up the Sanctuary & Beauty pillar. Whether it’s a two-hour wax appointment or spending the same on a cut and color as you would a car payment, Sher and Nance know this pillar can be a big commitment. In today’s episode, they help us improve our beauty game by sharing lip tips, signature nail colors and other secrets.

Then, Nancy lets us in on a juicy conversation with dating guru, Bela Gandhi. We hear about her recent dates — the good, the promising, and the guy who can’t stop talking about himself. Bela gets Nancy started on Phase 2 of online dating. Listen in to hear her expert advice!

Takeaways

[3:44] Taking care of yourself inside and out is so much fun. From skin care to hair and nails, it’s all a big game of self-love. Sheri and Nancy are committed to their cuts, colors, and mani-pedis. Mid-life is a great time to ramp up your beauty game.

[12:26] Calling all DreamTribers… Sheri and Nancy want your bold lip tips! Email them with your favorite cruelty-free (non-animal tested) brand of bright, colorful lipstick.

[14:13] Friends don’t let friends walk around with feathered lipstick on their face. They help them pick liners and sealers to keep it in place.

[15:32] Getting ready for a night out can be a delightful ritual. Pour yourself a “dresser” (that drink you have while you’re getting ready) and learn to enjoy the process.

[23:04] Nancy has been on four dates since she enrolled in Match.com and began this dating journey. So far, her favorite relationship of them all is with her dating coach, Bela!

[24:50] Bela tells us that men date online better than women because they see it as a numbers game. They send out many messages to many different women. Still, it’s important to give the men that look interesting the benefit of the doubt.

[28:46] Nancy recaps her four recent dates and agrees that meeting for one drink is way easier than a commitment to dinner. Thanks to Bela’s wisdom, the two-hour time limit on first dates has worked wonders. It gives Nancy an “out” on the dates that are not working and keeps her from getting too invested and staying too long on those that are promising.

[30:52] Bela’s formula for assessing whether a first date has enough pulse to move on to a second is

“Okay = good enough for a second date, and amazing = red flag, moving too fast.”

[35:26] The most important pillar in dating? Psychotic Optimism. The belief that love is on its way puts you and others at ease.

[36:13] Nancy’s homework for Phase 2 is to update her photo line-up and add one new piece of text every Sunday so that her profile gets noticed on primetime Sunday evenings. She is also starting to use the “Mutual Match” for proactive searching.

[44:26] The goal of online dating is to get off the computer and into real life. Move from emails to chatting on the phone, to a real-life date as quickly as possible. You aren’t looking for a pen pal, you’re looking for a person to connect within the flesh!

Mentioned in This Episode:

The Pillar Life

Harper Salon

Bela Gandhi